A new version of the Cossack Dance

I have written before about Robbie's tendency to 'dance' with fury when I irritate him. When he is cross with me and he tries to express his opinion he does this strange thing where he puts his hands on his hips and keeps bending his knees. Then as he warms to his theme he starts flapping his arms and then thrusting one arm forward to emphasise his argument. I sometimes struggle not to laugh because if it was speeded up a bit it really would look like a Cossack dance. I wrote about it way back in 2007 after a particularly frustrating morning with Robbie.

"Now to explain this morning's upset. We got up in good time and Robbie had as long as he needed in the bathroom, so things were going well. Considering they only have fractionally more to wash than women, I can't understand why men need to take so long in the bathroom!

The trouble started when we got to the station, Robbie went to get the parking ticket. I realised that he had brought his rucksack, I attempted to lift it and found that it contained a hundredweight of work documents as well as, diary, ipod, magazines, snacks and all the 'essentials' to deal with any conceivable railway emergency! Samuel has an unhealthy attachment to his rucksack too, he hates to be parted from it, but he has Asperger's Syndrome, Robbie is allegedly normal!

I took his ipod, pager and sweets out of his rucksack and put them in my handbag. When he returned I refused to let him take his rucksack. He would look ridiculous with a suit and a rucksack, I didn't want him to look like a Sherpa! Robbie went mad and had a full scale tantrum in the car park. I won the first round and he thundered off with what I can only describe as a cross between a stomp and a shuffle - if it had been speeded up it would have looked like a Cossack dance!  He was impossible and he continued the argument on the train, I was tempted to tip my hot chocolate over him, but it was too expensive to waste. It took him until almost lunchtime to recover his temper - so much for Valentine's Day!"

Last night I woke at about 3am when Robbie shouted out and then leapt out of bed. I am not at my best at 3am and it took me a while to become fully awake and make sense of what was happening in the bedroom. The first thing that I became aware of was torrent of swear words fired through the darkness like a volley of gunfire. As my eyes got used to the darkness I saw the silhouette of Robbie over by the bedroom door. As well as the copious swearing he appeared to be going through a series of jerky movements. I hadn't been too surprised by the swearing, after all this is a man who frequently talks to his socks and underwear in the middle of the night (he always has to put his clothes for the next day in the dark because he waits until I have gone to bed - and he always wakes me up!). I gradually interpreted the jerky movements, he was bending forwards and sticking one leg out as if he was pushing his heel into the floor, it looked like a robot doing a Cossack dance, but it was cramp and Robbie was in agony!

I felt so useless because nothing that I could say or do would help. He often gets cramp at night, but I think the pain was more severe last night. It is scary to see him in so much pain                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                             

Living Dangerously

I often go to bed before Robbie, partly because I need my sleep and partly because I prefer to listen to the radio rather than watch some of the scary stuff that he likes to watch on television. This works quite well for both of us but there is just one problem - Robbie! He doesn't understand the meaning of the word quiet and he always manages to wake me up when he comes to bed. He then falls asleep as soon as head hits the pillow leaving me wide awake unable to get back to sleep and fighting to hang on to the duvet.

On Monday night he decided to take things a step further. He wasn't quite ready for bed but he decided to come upstairs for a chat. He wasn't put off when he found that I was asleep, he just kept asking if I was awake until I woke up. So what was so important that he needed to wake me up at 1.30am? It certainly wasn't something that could be classed as an emergency even in 'Robbie world'. He wanted to inform me that the cat was suffering from flatulence! I told him loud and clear to 'go away' but I wasn't going to escape that easily. He went into great detail about the exact nature of the smell, then he started rambling on about possibly changing the cat's diet. By then I was ready to harm him and he made a hasty retreat.

The next day I asked him why he woke me up and he said he didn't think I was deeply asleep because I wasn't snoring - I give up!!

It's funny how fast you can wake up when you realise you've overslept.

I spent most of Friday getting ready to go out on a train on Saturday. So by Friday evening we had a massive picnic ready to take with us, my netbook was packed in my rucksack, my camera was charged and everything was ready for an early start. At least I thought everything was ready, but there was just one thing I had overlooked – Robbie! He was still awake when I went to bed but when the alarm clock went off at a stupidly early hour he was sound asleep next to me and he refused to wake up. I tried and tried but it was impossible, he didn’t wake up but when prodded he produced a selection of grunts and insults. In the end I gave up and let him sleep. When he woke up he was very cross with me. We were too late for the train we planned to catch but we made the best of the day and with a trip to Plymouth on an HST. I always enjoy the views as we pass the sea wall at Dawlish. It was a very exhausting day, we didn’t get home until almost 11pm and by then the roles were reversed, I was asleep on my feet but Robbie was wide awake!

Tea to the English is really a picnic indoors - Alice Walker

Today didn't start quite as well it should have. The alarm went off at 5am and I jumped into action, I shook Robbie awake and told him that it was already 5am and if he didn't hurry he would be late for his train. He turned over and said that he was getting up, there was no further action for a few moments, then he sat up 'zombie style' but he seemed to be still asleep. In those few moments my brain managed to catch up with the situation and I realised that it was Saturday! I told him that it was Saturday and I was very sorry for waking him up, he said "yes dear" and still in zombie mode he settled back into bed; he was instantly asleep. When we woke up at a more realistic hour for a Saturday Robbie had no recollection of the 5am episode.

A favourite pair of Robbie's Shoes

He came back to bed with a cup of tea for me (and a coffee for him) and announced that he wanted to show me some Dickies. I wasn't entirely sure what he was suggesting until he picked up my laptop and logged on to his favourite shoe website. Apparently the 'Dickies' in question were a particular type of canvas boots. Being Robbie he couldn't just look at one pair of shoes he showed me a whole selection of footwear that he would love to own. I guess he could be doing worse things than lusting after shoes, but our house isn't big enough to accommodate all his footwear.


Looking at the website led to a (very long) conversation about shoes he has known and loved. To be honest it was more of a monologue than a conversation. We had worked our way back to 1980s but I was spared further 'time travel' to his earlies footwear memories because he sent himself to sleep! I can't say it was the most exciting start to a Saturday morning, but seeing Robbie happy and relaxed makes me happy.  I was left feeling that some things are just meant to be. Robbie came to Northampton because of me, but what better place for someone with a passion for shoes, a bus ride away from the shoe museum and a stone's throw from the Doc Shop! 

Pyjama Problems

Robbie had a better night last night, partly because he didn't dare to go to bed until it was almost time to get up! I know he must be feeling as tired as I am because trying to wake him up this morning was like trying to wake the dead. I think it's a minor miracle that he managed to get to the station in time for his usual train this morning. I am rather worried that he will be sound asleep by the time he gets to New Street, but hopefully it will be a service that terminates there and he will not wake up to find himself heading further north!

On the subject of sleep my son has a problem. Most people think that being one of only a handful of boys at a girls school would be a dream come true, but it can cause unexpected problems. On Friday his school have a pyjama day to raise funds for something or other. He doesn't possess any pyjamas, he usually wears boxers in bed. He does have a onesie but he claims is skin tight and it would attract too much attention if he wore it to school. So it looks as if he will have to pass on the PJs and just go to school in his normal clothes. Chatting to him about this reminded me of a PJ related incident when he was about eight or nine and trying to be very grown up. At 17 he doesn't like to be reminded of the things he did when he was younger but I treasure all those funny little memories.  

2004
There was a funny little episode last week with S. A couple of days before he went to his first sleepover he said he absolutely had to have some deodorant – Sure for Men Sensitive to be exact. We went to get him some deodorant, but while at the shop he asked for FCUK pre shave face wash. I pointed out that he doesn't shave but he said "it says pre shave, and I will shave one day so it is ideal for me". He went to the sleepover with his grown up toiletries and his new leather jacket looking really cool. A couple of days after he got back I asked him if his mates had been impressed by his grown up stuff. He gave me a long stare, then in a very serious voice he said "you spoiled the effect mum, you packed my Buzz Lightyear pyjamas!" 

Better to live on the roof than share the house with a nagging wife. (GNB: Prov 21.9)

Robbie has done some daft things in his time (and been forgiven for most of them!) but this week he took a step too far. I know he is a slow learner but if he ever does that again he will need police protection! Sometime I long for the old days when he used to take his pager to bed with him. It woke me up countless times during the night and sometimes Robbie would wake me up to tell me about the state of the railways, but it wasn't as dangerous as his blackberry. He has two (one for each hand) one work one and one personal one, they put ideas into his head and lead him astray. Earlier this week he 'confessed' (under duress) that he had used his Blackberry to record me talking in my sleep. He thought it was hilarious. When I found out about it I made him play it back to me, most of it was him talking rather than me - nothing new there! I did mention a train and an elephant, but I wasn't rambling, I was just remembering our recent rather amazing trip on the Severn Valley Railway. I did see an elephant and a couple of rhinos when we went past West Midlands Safari Park. He has received stern warnings and if he knows what is good for him he will not record me again.


So why the quotation from the Bible, partly because it is one of my favourites and also because it gave me an excuse to include a Snoopy picture. The other day Robbie reminded me how much he likes Snoopy and it made me Realise how much Robbie has in common with Linus! The main reason for the quotation is because it is the 400th anniversary of the King James Bible. People who know me well will know tat it is not my favourite version of the Bible despite the beautiful use of language. I prefer the more accessible and down to earth language of the Good News translation, but I recognise the importance of the King James Bible. It made the Bible accessible to ordinary people in English but it is also an important literary work in its own right and it has influenced the way that English is spoken.


"And the earth was without form, and void; and darkness was upon the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God moved upon the face of the waters. And God said, Let there be light: and there was light..." 
Genesis ch1 v1-3

Norfolk Here We Come - Again!

Robbie set the alarm on his Blackberry to the time that he wanted to wake up, so at a stupidly early time the alarm went off. For a small phone it makes a very loud noise, it could wake the dead, but it doesn't wake Robbie - apparently that's my job!  The alarm went off and sleeping beayty didn't flinch, I shouted at him to turn it off and he said yes but did nothing. I yelled louder, this time he obeyed and turned the alarm off, but he didn't wake up! This process was repeated ever 5 minutes until 5.20 by which time I was ready to kill. I made dark threats about the fate of his Blackberry and he woke up sufficiently to turn the alarm off completly before pulling the covers over his head and going back to sleep. I went off and had my bath and got on with my morning routine before trying to wake him again, but after a series of insults (from him) he finally got up and waddled off to the bathroom to have a shower. 


By some miracle we were ready to leave the house at 8.20 and after a quick detour for fuel and to buy Robbie some breakfast we were on the road just before 9am. heading for Norfolk. This time we were going to collect some of my mum's luggage to make her journey home a little easier on Saturday. Traffic was fairly heavy but we made good time and we were at the bungalow just after 11.30. It was so nice to be close to the sea again, to look our across the beach and to listen to the rythum of the waves, to me it seems like the heartbeat of the earth.


My mum and stepfather took us for lunch in Mundesley, it was very nice, lamb shank with vegetables and yorkshire pudding. Afterwards we took my mum shopping in North Walsham while David (my step father) relaxed back at the bungalow. As we set off for North Walsham a butterfly fluttered across the windscreen of the car and then it fluttered alongside the passenger window until we reached the end of the lane. Then as we travelled along the very pretty country road to North Walsham Robbie noticed that we had a stowaway, a grasshopper was travelling on the windscreen wiper. Foolish as it may seem I had vague worries about it not being able to get back to it's correct habitat, but by the time we reached North Walsham my attention had been taken up with other things. 


We spent a happy couple of hours in North Walsham, Robbie bought some railway magazines and a couple of prints of old railway posters but I had more practical matters in mind, I bought some oven cleaner! As we drove back Robbie made a series of excited squeals and pointed out of the window. Usually this signals that he has seen a train, but as there was no railway line nearby I realised that it must be something else. He wasn't pointing out of the window he was pointing at the window, the grasshopper was hitching a lift back on the passenger window! I think it bailed out at almost the same spot that we picked it up!


Robbie had a bit of a sulk because I was unable to stop at exactly the spot he requested to enable him to  take a photo of a tractor in an adjoining field. He got over it eventually and it was such a nice day that we were able to go and sit in the garden with a cup of tea, or in Robbie's case a cup of coffee. Later on we went for a walk on the beach and I found a lovely 'wishing stone', if only it really could make my wishes come true.


We sat outside and watched the bats flying around the garden for a while, but then Robbie decided to go and have a shower because he was too hot. I went in and chatted to my mum, then after an hour or so we realised that Robbie was 'missing in action', he hadn't made it to the shower he was sprawled across the bed fast asleep. He didn't surface again, so when I went to bed I had to wake him up and ask him to move so that he wasn't blocking the entire bed. He answered me, but when I asked him to move he lifted his legs in the air, peddled vigorously and then resumed his original position. It took consiberal effort to shift him but eventually he went off to have a wash and get ready for bed. I stood at the window looking out at the moon on the sea and wishing that I could hang on to the precious times that sometimes seem so fleeting.

Soon Robbie was fast asleep again. I snuggled under the duvet, but it was a long time before I fell asleep. I lay there listening to the sounds of the sea and remembering the many happy times and a few sad ones spent here. This little bit of Norfolk will always hold a special place in my heart.

Puzzled

Robbie came to bed very late last night or more accurately I should say this morning, so when I got up he was still in the land of nod - and he remained there for half the morning! He was late coming to bed because he had got carried away with doing his jigsaw of the Flying Scotsman. I am not a jigsaw person but there is something about an unfinished jigsaw that demands your attention and spent a peaceful couple of hours with Radio 4 and the jigsaw. When Mr Sleepy finally woke up he wasn't best pleased, but he hid it well. We went out for lunch at Mundesley which was a nice treat. After that we had a bit of a potter around before heading back to the bungalow. I went for a walk along the beach, but Robbie stayed behind with his jigsaw, he made it very clear that my help was no longer needed. I was very happy out on the beach, I found a wishing stone and I wandered along noticing all the little details that you only notice when you are on your own.

Robbie completed his jigsaw, it looked amazing, now he has the next one out and he is planning to start that later this evening. It has pictures of old Hornby models on it, it looks really difficult but apparently he doesn't need any help! I have really enjoyed today, it has been fun, it is so nice to have to relax without the day to day world crowding in on us.  

To dare to preserve the randomness of mind which in children produces strange and wonderful new thoughts and forms - Gordon Webber

Robbie has been keeping up his reputation for randomness, this afternoon he asked me if it was true that gooseberries were green. When I told him that they were he expressed amazement and said he had never known that. We have been together for quite a few years now and I am certain that the subject of gooseberries has never cropped up until today, the odd thing is that he went on to tell me that he doesn’t like them!

Robbie showed a marked reluctance to get up this morning, so we didn’t go to the North Norfolk Railway, we went to Cromer instead. Cromer is not very big, but it has two very nice book shops and both have a good selection of railway books so it will not come as a surprise that Robbie bought a couple of books, one was about buses and the other is about British industrial locomotives. We also bought a board for Robbie’s jigsaw, he has brought two jigsaws on holiday with him and predictably both have a railway theme.


This evening I haven’t been able to get two words out of him, he has been busy reading his Bus book and reading bus timetables that he picked up in Cromer. There is no hope when he is not train spotting he is bus spotting and when he runs out of buses he stands at the window with his binoculars spotting ships!

To dare every day to be irreverent and bold. To dare to preserve the randomness of mind which in children produces strange and wonderful new thoughts and forms. To continually scramble the familiar and bring the old into new juxtaposition.

Gordon Webber

The Art of A Good Argument

The fact that Robbie and I argue will come as no surprise to regular readers of the blog, but the things that we argue about are perhaps a little more surprising. I listened to a discussion on the radio recently about the causes of arguments within relationships and I realised that Robbie and I argue about some very strange things compared to other people. So I decided to come up with a list, and looking back at the blog has revealed lots of evidence too..

The gender of God - Robbie is convinced that God is male, rather formal and definitely C of E, my understanding of God is considerably different. If Robbie gets too pompous about it I tell him that God is female and he loses it completely!   Sunday Morning Musings

The merits or otherwise of Ken Livingstone - This subject crops up when Robbie wants to provoke an argument, he knows exactly which buttons to press to get a reaction and it always works. The mere mention of that odious little man sends my blood pressure sky high and totally ruins my day. Red and Green, Not Fit to Be Seen

The fridge - Robbie is the self appointed ruler of the fridge. It has to be set out his way and he even expects me to buy condiments and such like in the correct size to fit in the spaces that he has designated for them. He is destined to be a very disappointed man because I do as I like!
The Fridge Police  Fitting In  King of the Fridge

Supermarket shopping - Supermarket shopping together is a very dangerous activity because it is very likely to lead to arguments. Robbie likes to push the trolley, to organise the trolley so that the items are stacked in the correct manner (according to him), to dictate the size shape and brand of item purchased and to be in complete control of the order the items are put through the checkout. There have been occasions when we have almost come to blows and on several memorable occasions he has danced with fury!  Survival - Against The Odds!

Trains come first - I shouldn't really complain, Robbie has never made any secret of the fact that he lives, breathes and sleeps trains, but there are occasions when it would be really nice if he could put me first just for a few minutes. In Disgrace Again 

Waking me up  - I really wish that I could make him understand how annoying it is to be woken up. He may be able to go to sleep as soon as his head hits the pillow, but if he wakes me up it takes me ages to get back to sleep. Of all the things that we argue about I find this the most hurtful because it is so thoughtless.  Tiredness Can Kill


What to wear - Robbie is so conventional in some ways, but when it comes to clothes he is unique, in fact I sometimes wonder about his sanity. The clothes he wears are a bit like him, loud, startling and a bit crazy - need I say more! I believe passionately in freedom of choice - my freedom to choose not to go out with him looking like that!! Human Rights


Hoarding - Both of us are hoarders, we both hoard different things for different reasons and it often leads to conflict. I have written countless posts about Robbie and his love of clutter, so it seems only fair to link to posts that explain what I hoard and why. Confessions of a Hoarder  Parting with Memories

Being tactless - Robbie has an unfortunate habit of speaking his thoughts and it can get him into big trouble at times Questions Questions 

Lack of awareness - Robbie is very lovable, but he has a complete lack of awareness of the way that his actions impact on those around him - mostly me!
Give Him an Inch and He Takes a Mile! 


The Location of the North - This is a matter of fierce debate. Having grown up in Northamptonshire I know that the North starts at Watford Gap but Robbie grew up in Staffordshire and he gets extremely annoyed when I say that he is from the north. We have a similar debate about the Midlands, Robbie thinks that the Midlands means Birmingham, but I keep telling him that Northamptonshire is classed as East Midlands while the whole area around Birmingham is the West Midlands. If yo really want a reaction from Robbie tell him that he has a Birmingham accent - and then run very fast!! I cant tell the difference but he insists that his Walsall accent is completely different.


Burial or Cremation - This is something that we will never agree about. When the time comes I want to be cremated because I think it is cleaner and more responsible, but Robbie wants to be planted. If he really annoys me I tell him that he will have to make sure he outlives me if he wants to get his own way, but he knows that if it came to it I would of course respect his wishes.

Some of these things are fairly trivial but some we could almost fight to the death over. Maybe that is why the blog is so useful, it helps me to get it out of my system without harming him! Some people say it is healthy to argue, it is better than not communicating at all and it is fun making up afterwards!

Robbie On A Bad Day

Where do I start? Maybe I should just say that Robbie's mood yesterday evening was a little fragile, it was clear that he was tired - the sound of snoring was a bit of a hint! I went to bed at around 11pm and I thought he would follow shortly after - he didn't! I made sure that all my alarm clocks were set correctly because it always takes my body clock a few days to adjust to losing an hour. Then I settled down to sleep. The next thing I remember is being woken by someone treading on my ankle - Robbie had finally decided to come to bed. I probably told him to go away as I drifted back to sleep, but I was woken again shortly after by a loud bleep, then another, then a whole series of bleeps and a flashing blue light. In my confused and sleepy state I couldn't work out what was going on, was it morse code or some sort of secret message? I forced my eyes open to see Robbie kneeling naked on the bed attempting to change the time setting on his new Lego alarm clock. There was a brief but brutal exchange of insults and I advised Robbie to take clock to the bathroom to set it with the light on! It was just after 2am and I was determined to get some sleep so I turned my back on him and pulled the duvet over my head.


His Lego alarm clock announced  that it was 5am and time to get up - he slept on. After several further episodes of blue lights and bleeping and considerable input from me, Robbie plodded off to the bathroom. That dratted alarm clock continued to serenade me every 5 minutes until Robbie returned, I wanted to implant it in his head but I restrained myself and told him to take it away and drown it! His interest was then taken up with pants! Allegedly I had deliberately deprived him of his favourite underwear by failing to do a dark wash yesterday. I did a dark wash on Sunday evening, how many pairs of pants could he possibly have got through since then! I provided him with clean pants and socks but he wasn't keen to let go of the issue and he continued muttering about the underwear conspiracy until he found something else to moan about. Apparently I have deliberately failed to oil the hinges on our bedroom door just to annoy him! That man makes my hands itch sometimes!!


The thing is that none of those things were the real problem. The truth is that he is in so much pain from his back and his legs that he doesn't know how to put one foot in front of the other. He will not go to the doctor because he knows there is nothing they can do except give stronger pain killers. I feel so useless, I wish I could make the pain go away, I wish I could do something, anything to make it easier for him. There has to be some way to ease the pain and I am not going to give up until I find it!


Photo by Clix

The Big Freeze

Robbie often comes up with ideas and most of them are totally batty (I think he reserves his sensible thoughts for work) but his latest daft idea has really annoyed me. We have had a couple of occasions recently when he has struggled to get up on time. Any sensible person would tell him that if he stays up working on his timetables until 2am he will not be ready to wake up again at 5am! Robbie has given the matter a lot of thought and has come up with the idea that we are feeling tired because the bedroom is too hot, so without any discussion he turned the radiator off. We only have it on for a few hours morning and evening, but that is enough to take the chill off the room and make it comfortable. Without heat it is so cold that I can't get to sleep for ages and when I wake up in the morning it is so cold that I just want to turn over and go back to sleep. I have had a full and frank exchange of views with Robbie and until normal heating is resumed I am on strike!

Direct Action - By The Dog!

I need to buy an alarm clock with sharper edges because the only way an alarm clock will ever wake him up is if I beat him with it! Robbie was late home last night and he'd had a hard day so I understood that he needed to unwind for a while. I went off to bed shortly before midnight leaving him to follow soon after, but he did his usual trick of falling asleep on the sofa and he didn't get to bed until the dog decided to chuck him out of the lounge. Megan is a very placid dog, but she has her limits and when the snoring gets too bad she wakes him up and sends him off to bed. A couple of weeks ago he was asleep on the sofa and he woke with a start to find the dog standing on top of him licking his face. It frightened him half to death and he thundered up the stairs as if the devil was after him!

This morning was a rush because I couldn't wake Robbie up, I had to resort to threats of harm before he finally struggled out of bed. I will not see him again today because he is going off to a gig after work, a group called the Bombay Bicycle Club. I am not really interested in music so When he first mentioned The Bombay Bicycle Club I had visions of Robbie on a bike, what a scary thought! I will be asleep before he gets home tonight, so I expect I will have similar problems waking him up tomorrow morning.

Longing for Normality

I was so angry with Robbie last night that I shouted at him. He didn't have much to say during the evening because he was glued to this laptop. I was busy too and by the time I went to bet at about a quarter past midnight 'Noddy' was dozing with his head resting on the computer keyboard. I woke him up, but I knew that he would be dozing again within moments, so I left him to it and went to bed. I was woken by a thumping and bumping in the bedroom and Robbie spoke to me in a sergeant major sort of voice. What he said was a bit 'out of focus' because I was sleepy, so I ignored him and tried to cling on to sleep. The next thing I knew something sailed past my face and thumped onto the pillow, I don't know what it was but it was intended to wake me up and it worked. Robbie informed me that he had been talking to me and with menace in my voice I asked what was important enough to wake me up. I am used to Robbie, but I couldn't believe the answer - he wanted to tell me that CrossCountry had produced a blow up guitar to celebrate the Reading Music Festival. He had seriously woken me up to talk about a blow up guitar! I did a spot of 'fortune telling' and all was silent until Robbie's voice broke through the darkness to inform me that it was a limited edition blow up guitar. How do I make him understand that I have absolutely no interest in blow up guitars, not even limited editions!!

I thought he would try to be a little more more 'normal' this morning, but he only had one topic of conversation - the pros and cons of the new hybrid FGW season ticket. it almost made blow up guitars seem interesting.

Getting Him Up!

Robbie is impossible - but that may not come as a surprise to many blog readers! The cause of my annoyance this morning is his inability to wake up when the alarm clock goes off. Before we went on holiday a situation had evolved where Robbie has just one alarm clock on his side of the bed and I had three! The were all set by Robbie to the time that he wanted to get up, in fact he had it so that they went off at five minute intervals and he didn't need to get up until the last alarm sounded. It was a lot of nonsence, it woke me but (in fact it drove me mad!) but Sleeping Beauty slumbered on and when I tried to wake him he would call me unpleasnt names.

At the start of this week I insisted that Robbie should have the alarm clocks on his side and take responsibility for getting himself up. He was very reluctant but I insisted, after all he is the one that needs to be up at that time, not me. It is a disaster, on Monday I finally woke him up by throwing the alarm clock at him, on Tuesday he went bask to sleep and called me a 'stupid woman' for making him late and this morning I woke him up five times to ask hin to turn the alarm clock off. He found a number of different ways to tell me to go away and in the end he passed me his mobile phone and asked me to turn it off when the racket was being created by one of the alarm clocks not the phone.

We have a sofa bed in the lounge, it looks as if it will be getting a lot of use!

Making Up

Robbie was late coming to bed again last night. I expect he was finding it hard to drag himself away from that book again. I don't know what time it was when he finally arrived in the bedroom, I had been deeply asleep but his loud conversation woke me up. I growled at him but he ignored the warning and continued talking. Then just to ensure that I had no chance of getting back to sleep he put his search light on and sat on the edge of the bed contemplating (or searching for) his navel. I threatened him with dire consequences but he just laughed at me, so war broke out. I was ready to kill him! He settled down in bed still giggling and within seconds he was snoring, but as always I took me forever to get back to sleep. I am going to confiscate his bulb!!

This morning he was repentant (and bruised). He said he wants to make up for always putting the trains first and neglecting me. Guess what he has in mind? A trip to York on a Voyager and a visit to the National Rail Museum!! Oh well, at least he is consistent. Sometimes I don't know if I should laugh or cry!

A Special Birthday

I think Robbie wishes he was still on holiday, I had problems waking him up this morning. I had to get cross with him before he would get moving so he has been issued with an ultimatum, from now on I will wake him up once, if he doesn't get up that is his problem not mine and I will not change my routine to help him out.

This morning was really busy, it is Laura's 18th birthday and she was really excited about opening her presents. We bought her a ring, she also had clothes and DVD's they were all things that she wanted. This evening we are going out for a family meal. Where have all those years gone?

Pillow Talk

When I woke this morning my mouth felt like sandpaper after yet another night of coughing. I lay there trying to send telepathic messages to Robbie that I needed a cup of tea, but he just carried on snoring. I tried more direct methods and pinched his bum, that was more effective and after several attempts he roused for just long enough to steal the whole duvet. Eventually he woke up but I still had an eternity to wait for my tea. He put his arm around me, cuddled up and embarked on a detailed monologue of the exact journey times for all the replacement buses between Northampton and Euston yesterday – scintillating! Just when I thought my ordeal was coming to an end he decided to name every station between Euston and Birmingham New Street and then he speculated on the meaning of each name! Finally nature succeeded where I had failed, he needed the loo and he plodded off to the bathroom. He returned at last with a cup of tea and when he got back in bed I made sure he kept well away from the subject of trains. He is so exhausting, I may have to send him back to work before New Year in order to get a few hours respite!

'Exciting' Information

Robbie and I finally had a weekend together without having to rush around, and at long last we are both feeling a little more human again after the flu bug. There is nothing nicer than waking up on a Saturday morning and not having to rush to get up. I had almost forgotten how good it felt, I had also forgotten Robbie's unfailing ability to spoil the moment - this week his thoughts strayed to the hand dryers in the gents toilets at Leeds Station! Why would he imagine that I would be interested at all, and why choose that moment to share such 'exciting' information? I don't suppose I will ever be able to change him, but there are times when I wish he could be just a little bit more 'normal'.

Dozy!

David is still in hospital in Oxford, so I took my mum and Emily to visit him again, it is a really horrible journey with far too many roundabouts and stops and starts and it takes ages. David was moaning yesterday, a sure sign that he is getting back to his old self! He is having trouble sleeping because of all the noise on the ward.

I haven't really seen much of Robbie over the last couple of days, he leaves for work at about 6am and I don't get back from work until 10.30pm and by then I am so tired that I just want to sleep. Robbie sat down on the sofa soon after I got home and within seconds he was dozing. About ten minutes later he suddenly jolted awake and started talking, I didn't take much notice at first but I became aware that he was giving a detailed account of a plot from a Simpsons episode. As the question 'why?' formed in my head, he stopped talking and looked confused. Then he admitted “I've been rambling haven't I” and he settled down and went back to sleep – a bit like the dormouse in Alice in Wonderland!