Robbie On A Bad Day

Where do I start? Maybe I should just say that Robbie's mood yesterday evening was a little fragile, it was clear that he was tired - the sound of snoring was a bit of a hint! I went to bed at around 11pm and I thought he would follow shortly after - he didn't! I made sure that all my alarm clocks were set correctly because it always takes my body clock a few days to adjust to losing an hour. Then I settled down to sleep. The next thing I remember is being woken by someone treading on my ankle - Robbie had finally decided to come to bed. I probably told him to go away as I drifted back to sleep, but I was woken again shortly after by a loud bleep, then another, then a whole series of bleeps and a flashing blue light. In my confused and sleepy state I couldn't work out what was going on, was it morse code or some sort of secret message? I forced my eyes open to see Robbie kneeling naked on the bed attempting to change the time setting on his new Lego alarm clock. There was a brief but brutal exchange of insults and I advised Robbie to take clock to the bathroom to set it with the light on! It was just after 2am and I was determined to get some sleep so I turned my back on him and pulled the duvet over my head.


His Lego alarm clock announced  that it was 5am and time to get up - he slept on. After several further episodes of blue lights and bleeping and considerable input from me, Robbie plodded off to the bathroom. That dratted alarm clock continued to serenade me every 5 minutes until Robbie returned, I wanted to implant it in his head but I restrained myself and told him to take it away and drown it! His interest was then taken up with pants! Allegedly I had deliberately deprived him of his favourite underwear by failing to do a dark wash yesterday. I did a dark wash on Sunday evening, how many pairs of pants could he possibly have got through since then! I provided him with clean pants and socks but he wasn't keen to let go of the issue and he continued muttering about the underwear conspiracy until he found something else to moan about. Apparently I have deliberately failed to oil the hinges on our bedroom door just to annoy him! That man makes my hands itch sometimes!!


The thing is that none of those things were the real problem. The truth is that he is in so much pain from his back and his legs that he doesn't know how to put one foot in front of the other. He will not go to the doctor because he knows there is nothing they can do except give stronger pain killers. I feel so useless, I wish I could make the pain go away, I wish I could do something, anything to make it easier for him. There has to be some way to ease the pain and I am not going to give up until I find it!


Photo by Clix

How Did This Become My Job?

I have written before about Robbie's selection of alarm clocks, each one set for a slightly different time. The theory is that if one alarm doesn't wake him the next one will, the reality is that none of them wake him up. They wake me up, they probably wake my neighbours up but Robbie slumbers on! Each time I silence an alarm I wake him up, he responds, he even speaks to me, sometimes he tells me in no uncertain terms to go away, often he agrees that he needs to get up but before he has even finished his sentence he is snoring again! It isn't good for my blood pressure, I end up wanting to scream at him, in fact I think I will have to design an alarm clock that administers an electric shock, maybe that will get him out of bed without all this fuss!

Direct Action - By The Dog!

I need to buy an alarm clock with sharper edges because the only way an alarm clock will ever wake him up is if I beat him with it! Robbie was late home last night and he'd had a hard day so I understood that he needed to unwind for a while. I went off to bed shortly before midnight leaving him to follow soon after, but he did his usual trick of falling asleep on the sofa and he didn't get to bed until the dog decided to chuck him out of the lounge. Megan is a very placid dog, but she has her limits and when the snoring gets too bad she wakes him up and sends him off to bed. A couple of weeks ago he was asleep on the sofa and he woke with a start to find the dog standing on top of him licking his face. It frightened him half to death and he thundered up the stairs as if the devil was after him!

This morning was a rush because I couldn't wake Robbie up, I had to resort to threats of harm before he finally struggled out of bed. I will not see him again today because he is going off to a gig after work, a group called the Bombay Bicycle Club. I am not really interested in music so When he first mentioned The Bombay Bicycle Club I had visions of Robbie on a bike, what a scary thought! I will be asleep before he gets home tonight, so I expect I will have similar problems waking him up tomorrow morning.