To succeed in life, you need three things: a wishbone, a backbone and a funnybone - Reba McEntire

A couple of weeks ago when I was chatting to my older daughter Emily she stopped in mid conversation and looked at my hands. She said "mum look at your hands, they've turned into Grandma's hands" and she took my hand in hers and looked at it closely. I can always rely on one or other of my offspring to tell me the uncomfortable truth. Some months ago my son had a word with me about my hairstyle, he warned me not to have my hair cut any shorter or I would be in danger of looking like a lesbian. I couldn't help laughing, I may have cared what people thought once, but not these days people can think what they like. 

I understood exactly what my daughter meant about my hands. You can try all sorts of lotions and potions to make your face look younger but your hands tell the truth, you can't stop your hands ageing. Several weeks ago my son asked me to buy him make up and a special sort of liquid to create scars ready for Halloween. I wasn't impressed, I don't approve of the Americanisation of our customs and traditions; as far as I'm concerned trick or treating is worse than begging because there is an element of threat. I managed to stop myself before my thoughts became words. Will knows my thoughts on Halloween and I knew he wouldn't be going trick or treating so there was no harm in him dressing up to go to a party. He has had a passion for dressing up ever since he was a little boy and in recent years he has become very creative with stage make up. It crossed my mind that if I'm not careful I will be like my grandma - she managed to turn disapproval into a performance art! When I was little it seemed as if she disapproved of everything that I found enjoyable and I don't want to be like that, so Will got his items for Halloween and he promised to send me some photos.

I used to enjoy bonfire night when I was a child but it seems to have got a bit out of control now. When I was growing up we just had a few fireworks in the back garden, Catherine wheels, Roman candles, screeches, traffic lights, jumping jacks, a couple of small rockets and some sparklers. It was all carefully supervised by my mum to make sure we stayed safe, and when our little display was over we would go back into the house and eat jacket potatoes to warm us up after standing out in the cold. Fireworks seem bigger and louder now (and much more expensive) and we are bothered by the sound of fireworks for days before and after bonfire night. It is very upsetting for the animals, so many dogs and other animals are terrified by the sound of fireworks. I think perhaps we need tighter regulation about when fireworks can be set off. I can remember my grandma saying that fireworks were a wicked waste, she said it was like burning money and I have to admit that she had a point. I haven't bought fireworks for over twenty years, but I think it would be a shame to see the custom die out completely.

The weather is finally getting a bit colder, not perhaps as cold as I would expect it to be in November but cold enough to make me want to wear a coat sometimes. At last I've packed away my summer clothes, dusted off some of my autumn and winter clothes, taken a big bag of stuff to the recycling bank and a few bits and bobs that weren't good enough for recycling were given a decent burial. I'm not usually very good at parting with clothes so I decided to reward myself with a couple of new items. I fell in love with a needle cord skirt which had a subtle rose pattern, but it was a little bit tight and much too long. I wasn't going to let a little thing like that put me off, I bought it anyway and made plans to alter it. It took a fair bit of planning and measuring, I unpicked the waistband, took out the zip, lining and part of the side seems, shortened it from the top then repositioned the zip, lining, side seems and waistband. It only took me a few hours and it was worth the effort because it fits perfectly and I like it. I guess the ability to sew is a very useful skill that both my mum and my grandma passed on to me, I'm grateful for that and I'm grateful for the example of my mum's determination and ability to cope with all the challenges that came her way. She has always told me that a woman can do anything that a man can do and we can do most things better because we take time to plan and we read the instructions! 

It was raining last Friday when I went to stay with my friend Clare but when I drove back on Saturday afternoon I was able to enjoy the beautiful Warwickshire and Northamptonshire landscape. As I left the A5 and joined the A428 at Crick the sun was sinking towards the horizon with a breathtaking display of deep fiery red colours. Ahead of me were deep, dark storm clouds but looking through the rear view mirror I could see clear skies, it was the sort of day when amid all the confusion you would expect to see a rainbow. On this occasion I only saw a faint one after I had driven away from the storm clouds, but it reminded me that I saw a very bright rainbow on another recent journey home from Clare's and when I was at her house in September we saw a double rainbow. I know it is only a natural phenomenon but I don't think it's possible to see a rainbow without feeling a glimmer of hope.

When I got home on Saturday the cats tried to lie to me, I knew that my daughter had fed them but they acted as if they were starving so I gave them some extra food and then went to sit down with a cup of tea. When I went back into the kitchen Dave the cat had vanished, I found him in a little den that he had created between the fridge freezer and the radiator. It is a fairly narrow space, I have several narrow storage boxes stacked there with brushes and mops standing behind. On top of the storage boxes I have a bag of reusable shopping bags and another bag full of carrier bags, Dave had made himself a cat nest in the bag of carrier bags. He has several cat beds, igloos, blankets etc, but he was a stray for a long time, old habits die hard and he likes to find his own comforts. I couldn't resist taking a photo of him with his 'poor pathetic me' face. I wouldn't let him stay on his nest of carrier bags, but maybe I will buy him a radiator bed instead.

A cats got her own opinion of human beings. She don't say much, but you can tell enough to make you anxious not to hear the whole of it --Jerome K. Jerome

If there was such a thing as a Krypton Factor for cats Dave would be a champion. A few nights ago there was a commotion in the kitchen at around 2am but thankfully it was not burglars, it was Dave attacking the cat proof food recycling bin. I put the bin safely out of his way and trudged back to bed. The next morning I came down to find an open food recycling bin and an work of abstract art made from tea bags and crusts set out on the kitchen floor. Dave gave me a penetrating look and I was left in no doubt that he disapproves of cat proof containers. He doesn't eat tea bags and he's not fond of crusts, he was just proving that as far as he is concerned nothing is cat proof. Cats are such wonderful communicators, it only requires a look or an almost imperceptible flick of the tail for Dave to convey absolute contempt. 

As I picked up the debris and then cleaned the kitchen floor I realised how much of my time is taken up attending to the needs of an assortment of animals. We only have three cats, but my mum and stepfather are both frail so I help them with their animals too. Their elderly cat Jessica is beautiful, but she's as wild and unpredictable a tiger and it takes nerves of steel (and protective clothing) to get her into the cat basket when she needs to go to the vet. Shopping for the cat takes far longer than anyone would believe possible because because mum has to examine every flavour and brand of cat food to decide whether Jessica would like it. Then after lots of deliberation she buys the same combination of brands that she always buys!

Lucy is my favourite of mum's three dogs, when she came from Wood Green Animal Shelter she was pathetically thin and afraid of her own shadow, but now she is healthy and happy. One of her parents was a Shih Tzu and the other a Border Collie - an improbable liaison which probably involved a step ladder! She combines the intelligence and behaviour of a (rather neurotic) Border Collie with the build and colouring of a Shih Tzu and despite her difficult past she has a lovely friendly nature. She seems to be especially attached to me, she follows me like a shadow, sits next to me whenever I sit down and when I stop stroking her she nudges my arm with her nose to get my attention - which often results in spilt tea and a disgraced dog! 

Bobby and Misty the other two Shih Tzus are a little younger than Lucy, and completely bonkers. They are brother and sister but Bobby is twice the size of Misty, he is gentle and friendly but Misty is a little spitfire and what she lacks in height she makes up for in attitude. Taking them to the groomers is a nightmare, it's like having chimps in the car, Bobby cries because he has left my mum behind and Misty spends the entire journey telling other road users to go away! She also objects to the car radio, if I turn it on she barks frantically and searches for the people hiding in the car. Needless to say, I prefer not to take them out in the car more often than absolutely necessary! 

Shopping for their food is a nightmare, Bobby is a solid little chap and despite being reassured by the vet that he is the correct weight for his size my mum worries that he doesn't eat. Getting him to eat seems to have become an obsession for my mum, so we loiter endlessly in the dog food section looking for new possibilities to tempt him to eat. Lucy eats reasonably well (as long as no one looks at her) and she is the easiest of the three dogs to shop for. It probably only takes about 15 minutes for my mum to consider every option and then decide to buy her regular brand of dog food! 

The other member of the household is Fred the tortoise who has been part of the family since my childhood. He is probably the most pampered tortoise in the county and there are times when I envy his lifestyle! In October he retires to his winter quarters and sleeps until the spring when the days become warmer again. His summer quarters, an open fronted hutch in a large pen has to be moved around the lawn so that he can enjoy fresh grass and plenty of dandelions (his favourite). Throughout the spring and summer he munches his way through a monumental amount of salad and such like. Mum insists on having a bird net over the pen to stop them from stealing his food and every time it rains my mum covers his run with a tarpaulin so that he will not get wet, then when the sun comes out she adjusts the tarpaulin so that he has plenty of shade. So as you can see one small tortoise manages to dominate the daily routine of the household!

A couple of years ago we made the mistake of buying a multi hanger bird feeder for my stepfather so that he could enjoy watching the birds through the window. It was a success, in fact it was too successful, feeding the birds seems to dominate their lives! They get through unbelievable quantities of seed, sunflower seeds, fat balls and assorted pellets and every couple of weeks I'm dispatched to the pet superstore to buy a trolley load of supplies for the birds! Judging by the amount of food they eat it is a wonder that any of the local birds can still fly! 

I wouldn't be without my pets, but they are not quite as pampered as my mums. If the people who believe in reincarnation are proved right I hope that I will come back as a tortoise because Fred seems to have a happy and untroubled life!

Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm - Winston Churchill

Last week didn't start very well. I'm not the greatest fan of Mondays, this particular Monday started far too early and it went down hill from there. It was one of those mornings that felt like one step forward and two steps back but I plodded on with my paperwork with the occasional cup of tea to keep me going. Eventually I decided that it was time for a lunch break and I went to put the kettle on. Our fridge-freezer is taller than me with the fridge at the top. I opened the door to reach for the milk, I had been to the fridge several times during the morning with no problem but this time two bottles from the top shelf launched themselves towards me. A bottle of water gave me a glancing blow on the head and a full bottle of diet Pepsi flew out like a torpedo and hit me on the calf! I cried out, hopped, danced and fell over a cat! I missed out on lunch, I was too busy dealing with a badly bruised leg and a very indignant cat!

Glasgow Central - photo by kilnburn

Tuesday evening went a bit pear shaped, Euston had one of its increasingly frequent periods of inertia which I believe was due to signal failure somewhere or other. Eventually Robbie gave up and took himself to St Pancras, bought another ticket and caught a train to Kettering, and I headed to Kettering Station to pick him up. I got there early but I didn't mind waiting, it's a nice little station and I like the old buildings. Considering the earlier disruption a surprisingly cheerful Robbie emerged from the station. He told me that there had been news reports suggesting that Abellio would be awarded the ScotRail franchise. It was still just rumour, but an announcement was expected the following morning and he dared to hope that the rumours might be true. Robbie made a very early start the next morning and he was in London before the formal announcement was made. The rumours were true, the ScotRail contract had been won by Abellio. Robbie was delighted, he and the rest of the bid team had spent months in Glasgow working on the bid and now their efforts had been rewarded.

I loved Glasgow when I first went there many years ago but it had been a long time since I'd been to Scotland and Robbie working in Scotland gave me an opportunity to  fall in love with Glasgow all over again. In the autumn of 2013 Robbie arranged to take me to Malmaison in Glasgow as a birthday treat. It was a bit of a joke on his part, but great fun, he had booked the Big Yin suite which is inspired by Billy Connolly who is a favourite of mine. It has a four poster bed, a very nice double bathroom and a roll top bath in the living room. 

Robbie knows how much I enjoy a nice long bath so this was his way of teasing me, but I have to admit that it was fun. I enjoyed the bath, I wasn't so struck on the four poster bed, it was very solid and a bit scary, but it was reasonably comfortable.  

I don't think I would go back to Malmaison because the food was horrible, the service was poor and the room was a bit tired, but as a one off experience the suite was interesting.

Work for the ScotRail bid began in ernest in January and Glasgow became Robbies second home. He caught the Sleeper to Glasgow on a Sunday evening and he returned home late on Friday evening. During the week he stayed in the Premier Inn in George Street. It is an interesting building just a short walk from the centre of Glasgow and very close to the Merchant City area with beautiful buildings and lots of nice places to eat. Unfortunately Robbie didn't get to see much of Glasgow, he was far too busy with the bid to have time for sightseeing, but he enjoyed his walk to and from work each day. Often when he was finished for the night he would call in at Queen Street Station to watch the trains and to experience the hustle and bustle of the station.  

I was able to spend time with Robbie occasionally when he was in Glasgow. I didn't really spend much time actually with Robbie except when we had our evening meal but having so much time to myself worked out rather well. I was still working on my book at the time of my first visit, so having the room to myself gave me plenty of peace and quiet to get my writing done. I would write until lunch time, then I would allow myself an hour or two to walk into the city centre to visit the shops, look at the wonderful building and discover more of Glasgow. Then I would go back and do more writing until about 9pm when we would go out for dinner. Glasgow was even more beautiful in the dark. 

A building nr George Square, Glasgow

By the time I returned to Glasgow the book had been submitted to the publisher and I had more freedom to explore, I loved it. One of my favourite walks took me past Buchanan Galleries, past the Doc Shop and along Sauchiehall Street. There is something special about Sauchiehall Street, it isn't the grandest street in the city, in fact parts of it are quite shabby but it has character. It seems to be a favourite spot for street entertainers, some of them are very good. It seems to attract some interesting characters too, I met some interesting people on my walks, and most seemed happy to stop and chat. I'm looking forward to Robbie having some free time so that we can go back and explore Glasgow together.

“Voyage upon life's sea, To yourself be true, And, whatever your lot may be, Paddle your own canoe”

Saturday 3rd August

The alarm woke me, I could so easily have turned over and gone back to sleep but I wanted to make an early start. I have looked forward to this holiday for so long and I want to make the most of every single minute. Surprisingly 'Sleeping Beauty' got up willingly and trotted off to make a cup of tea.

Usually Robbie finds every possible reason to delay us, but to my surprise we were packed and ready to go by 9am - perhaps the promise of a brief stop at Mc Donald's to get some breakfast helped to focus his mind. I am not a great fan of Mc Donald's but their hot chocolate is very nice as an occasional treat. Dave the cat was in a very bad mood he turned his back on me, refused his breakfast and wouldn't even acknowledge me when I said goodbye to him! Poor Dave, he hates it when we go on holiday but I'm sure My daughter will take good care of him.

I'd already had firm words with Robbie about the Sat-Nav. Last time we went to Norfolk he upset it and the poor thing lost the plot, it was a case of train planner v Sat-Nav and we almost ended up in a field! This time I'd had a good look at the map and I was determined that neither of them should lead me astray. Robbie did very well really, I was somewhat alarmed when I glanced across and noticed that he was using a Quail map but apparently he was just trying to identify a disused level crossing!

We made good time and arrived in Mundesley in time to enjoy lunch at the Beach Cafe, the food there is fantastic, I love going there. Robbie had his favourite lifesaver breakfast and I had fish and chips, it was lovely, beautifully cooked, and such a large portion that I wouldn't want anything else to eat that day! After a couple of hours in Mundesley we took a gentle drive towards Walcott, picked up the key and then at long last we were at the bungalow - I have been looking forward to this for so long, I love this place.

The car was unpacked, everything was put away, and before long it was just like home, our sanctuary for the next two weeks. At last we could relax, enjoy the sunshine and leave the worries of the world behind for a couple of weeks. The view from the back garden is awesome, just sand, sea and sky as far as the eye can see - it certainly helps to put things into perspective! 

Bernard the Bathroom Cat

Yesterday after a rather frustrating day I sat down in the lounge to relax for a couple of hours before bed. Before long Bernard came into the lounge and settled down on my lap and began to purr. It may sound like a very ordinary thing, hardly worthy of comment, but for Bernard it represents a huge improvement since she became part of our family a year ago.

For those who don't usually read the blog we first became aware of the cat a couple of days before Christmas 2011 when the turkey that was left in the utility room to defrost was partially eaten by an animal. It turned out that a stray cat had broken in through a sealed cat flap. This is what I wrote about it early last year.

"The saga of the cat continues, every time we put her out she sits outside meowing all day and all night, then just when you notice that it has all gone quiet you realise that she has broken in again! We can't go on like this so I decided that today I was going to take her to the vet to see if she has been chipped. There were just two small problems, catching her and getting her into the cat carrier. 

Yesterday evening my son and daughter caught her - eventually! She had hidden herself behind the fittings in the utility room again and it took forever to coax her out. Finally she was confined to the kitchen (where we hoped she wouldn't be able too hide, but she had other plans. She made her escape and this morning she had to be coaxed out from under a bed! 

Once again she was confined to kitchen and when the rest of the family had been despatched to work and school, I was left to get her into the cat carrier. There was just one problem the cat had decided that there was no way that it was getting into the cat carrier. She grew several extra legs (or at least it seemed like that), she did some amazing gymnastics, the only thing she didn't do was get into the cat carrier. Then after about ten failed attempts I managed to get her in and lock the door of the carrier behind her. I took a few minutes to calm her and let her get used to the carrier before heading off to the vet.

According to the vet she is a female and aged about three. She is not significantly under weight, but she is timid. She is not on any missing lists, I have checked with every group in the area, so the vet thinks that the best thing to do is to look for another home for her."

We didn't plan to keep her, but she was so skittish that it was not easy to find anyone to take her. She has always been a very clean cat, never any accidents but she spent months hiding away from us, she just coming out to to eat before darting back into her hiding place. For some reason the bathroom was her favourite hiding place, she liked to scramble right behind the bath where no one could reach her. We were reluctant to give her a name or to get too attached in case we were able to rehome her and until we had taken her to the vet we didn't even know if she was male or female so we jokingly referred to her as Bernard (named after Nursie in Blackadder, a girl with a boy's name) and by the time we were ready to give her a name she had 'become' Bernard.

I think she will always be shy especially with strangers, but she has a family now and she seems happy. When she came to us her coat was dull and harsh to touch and she was always hungry, but now she is in lovely condition and her coat is soft and silky. We didn't intend to become a three cat family but it is nice to see what a bit of love and attention can do to change the life of a stray.

“Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow.” - Jeff Valdez

Despite being my day off, Friday has been rather stressful. More snow fell in the night, just enough to cover the roads and the cars. They had been cleared after the previous snow fall a couple of days ago but the roads were slushy and reluctant drivers had to spend time clearing snow from their cars before taking to the road. It was very cold, the sort of day when you want to stay at home in front of the fire. In fact Dave the cat made sure that he had the warmest spot in the house all day and he made it quite clear that he had no intention of moving. 

Robbie was working from home, so we didn't need to go far, but my daughters had to drive to work and my son had to brave the elements to walk to school. I hoped there would be no more snow because I had to take David (my step father) to a hospital appointment in the afternoon. The snow continued falling all morning and the roads became more dangerous, so we took the decision to postpone his appointment. He is frail due to his kidney cancer and he walks with two sticks (he has had two hip replacements), so I was very worried about him falling and hurting himself. I think he was quite relieved not to have to go out in the snow.

By early afternoon the buses had stopped running and reports of traffic chaos filled the news broadcasts. One daughter was already home, but she was worried about her boyfriend who had to drive back from Cranfield and I was worried about my other daughter who would not be able to drive home from her teaching placement at Corby until her school closed. Eventually both arrived home safely, apparently it took three hours to get back from Cranfield and my daughter took almost as long to get back from Corby. 

We need to get our local planning sorted out, the world shouldn't grind to a halt every time we have a couple of inches of snow, but that is a problem for another day. At least all my family are home safely for the weekend.

Easter Eggs and Summer Holidays

This morning I found myself asking the cat what the world is coming to. He didn't answer, he was probably lost for words. I have to admit that every year I become a little bit more like my grandmother. As far as I know she didn't talk to cats, but she often told me that the world was going mad - I wonder what she would make of the way things are now. 

The reasons for my frustration were Easter Eggs and summer holidays. Our local co-op had Easter eggs on display on 27th December and I think the media began bombarding us with adverts for summer holidays at about the same time. Surely they could have waited until we had taken the Christmas decorations down! After all the hard work and expense of Christmas all I want is a bit of normality, with some peace and quiet. I don't even want to think about Easter or summer holidays for a while.

On the subject of Christmas decorations, we will be taking them down tomorrow and guess what everyone is too busy to help! After several weeks of decorations it is nice to see the room looking less cluttered, but I always have mixed emotions about packing away the decorations. Christmas is behind us,  another year has begun and I can't help wondering what sort of challenges the months ahead have in store for us. 

We have a large collection of Christmas decorations, some date back to my childhood and the children have their own decorations, I have bought them one every year since they were born and marked it with the year and a few words about milestones for that year. They make up a very special store of memories. Every year before the tree goes up there is a lot of debate about whose angel will go on top of the tree. My angel hasn't been anywhere near a Christmas Tree for years, but she still looks good despite her advancing age. When I was a little girl my mum used to help me to make a new dress and new wings for the angel every year. We made it from crepe paper, scraps of tinsel and foil and she looked just as good as the expensive shop bought angels that have taken her place. It is little things like that which make Christmas special, it doesn't have to cost a fortune to create happy memories.

There is always one moment in childhood when the door opens and lets the future in. ~Graham Greene

I have been working on a project, it is a rather belated project now because it should have been completed in time for my son's 18th birthday on 20th of December, but I was feeling so poorly that time got the better of me. I am creating a photo scrapbook for my son with photos and memories from my son's childhood. 

I spent ages choosing photos, the hardest part was deciding what not to include. Then when they were printed I had so much trimming and cutting out to do that my fingers ached for days afterwards. Now I am busy arranging the photos and creating the scrapbook - it takes ages to get it looking just right, but he is worth the effort. 

As I look at all the photos I can't help wondering where all the years have gone. How did that angelic looking little chap grow up so fast, it only seems like a few years ago that he played a shepherd in the nativity play at nursery and he walked in swinging his lamb around by the tail!

Here is an extract from my diary dated March 2004 when my son was nine, as you can see life with him has never been dull.

"As we were coming back from Music School at lunchtime my son said "I have my usual maths and English homework, but there is something else this week; I have to catch a worm because Monday is take a worm to school day" 
He went on to explain that they are making a wormery. Surely my life is complicated enough without having to go out and dig for worms! I urged him to wait until Sunday afternoon before collecting his worm, but being a boy he just couldn't wait and when I was working in the kitchen he brought in a large worm and put it into my hand. I was prevailed upon to provide a suitable container for it, and over the next hour or so I was introduced to five or six more worms in assorted sizes. 

At teatime all my efforts to change the subject were
thwarted and we were treated to a lecture from my son on the reproductive habits of the earthworm. His understanding of the term hermaphrodite was rather sketchy, and my memories of `O' Level Biology were too limited to be useful. Sam concluded in his deep and serious voice (which always makes me want to laugh) "I think it really means that they don't enjoy themselves very much!"

We had a bit of a disagreement at bedtime when I realised that the little terror had taken the worms to bed with him. When I refused to allow him to have them on his bedside table. He said "mum, you can't put them outside, they are part of the family now" We compromised and they are spending the night in the shed (in their container). I must remember to thank his teachers for completely disrupting our weekend."

My son has always loved animals, so our pets all have a place in the scrapbook. I thought I had got all the photos for the album but Dave the cat had other ideas, I think he wants to make sure that he will be included. He posed for this photo (he is wearing my son's hat) and it is so cute that I have to include it.

If you carry your childhood with you, you never become older.  ~Tom Stoppard

The greatest gift is our own eyes, sense of smell, and abilities to deduce - Patricia Cornwell

I was dreading going home after our holiday, because I knew the house would be a mess, it was, but it was not as bad as it was last year. We had a nice surprise because my daughter had painted the bathroom and it looks very nice. When we opened the front door we were met by a very unpleasant smell and my first hour or so at home was taken up with trying to track it down. It wasn't animal related and it wasn't the bin, amazingly the bin bag in the kitchen was almost empty. I tracked the pong to the kitchen but I couldn't identify it, I checked for rotting vegetables, but there were none, I had a good sniff inside the fridge but the smell wasn't coming from there. 

In the end I had to leave it and get on with tidying the kitchen and doing the laundry. Then Robbie made me a cup of tea and I sat down in the lounge to drink it. I could smell an over-ripe banana in the fruit bowl and I took it out to the food recycling caddy and as I lifted the lid, the pong was revealed in all it's glory. The contents of the caddy which had morphed into a green hairy mass, had been there since before our holiday! When I had escorted the stinking mass to the outside food bin and disinfected the food caddy, the inquest began. My son was adamant that it was not on his list - a typically aspie response! My older daughter who has a poor sense of smell claimed not to have noticed it and her sister announced that she doesn't have anything to do with food recycling because it is gross. So, the combined intellect of two university graduates and an A Level student was not sufficient to cope with the 'complexities' of  emptying the food caddy. Next year I will leave the cat in charge!

Living Dangerously

I often go to bed before Robbie, partly because I need my sleep and partly because I prefer to listen to the radio rather than watch some of the scary stuff that he likes to watch on television. This works quite well for both of us but there is just one problem - Robbie! He doesn't understand the meaning of the word quiet and he always manages to wake me up when he comes to bed. He then falls asleep as soon as head hits the pillow leaving me wide awake unable to get back to sleep and fighting to hang on to the duvet.

On Monday night he decided to take things a step further. He wasn't quite ready for bed but he decided to come upstairs for a chat. He wasn't put off when he found that I was asleep, he just kept asking if I was awake until I woke up. So what was so important that he needed to wake me up at 1.30am? It certainly wasn't something that could be classed as an emergency even in 'Robbie world'. He wanted to inform me that the cat was suffering from flatulence! I told him loud and clear to 'go away' but I wasn't going to escape that easily. He went into great detail about the exact nature of the smell, then he started rambling on about possibly changing the cat's diet. By then I was ready to harm him and he made a hasty retreat.

The next day I asked him why he woke me up and he said he didn't think I was deeply asleep because I wasn't snoring - I give up!!

If the shoe fits, buy it in every color! Author Unknown

Robbie abandoned me again on Wednesday because he'd had a better offer. How can I possibly compete with  his beloved trains, especially when it is something a bit unusual that can't be put off until another day. It would have been nice to have spent the day with him, but he bribed me with the promise that if I let him go he would take me out for lunch on Thursday. I had a nice time without him, I visited one of my favourite shops (but I didn't spend too much!) then I went to the park with my daughter. We bought an ice cream from the van, Gallone's make the best ice cream in the world! It was lovely in the shade of the big horse chestnut trees, we watched the children in the playground and reminisced about how much better the playground equipment used to be before 'health and safety' spoil the fun. She will be 21 in a couple of weeks, I couldn't help smiling when she said that things were so much better in 'her day'. I wonder how she will feel when she is my age.

Robbie kept his promise and took me out for a carvery lunch, it was lovely. We ate outside in a shady spot in the garden, after all those weeks of rain it is lovely to have some sunshine. I waited until after lunch to break the news to him that the cats had scratched his Dr Marten boots! His initial reaction was calm, especially when I offered to take him to the Doc Shop. He was over the moon with his new purchases, some English made pink shoes and some English made black 1461s with yellow stitching. He was more vocal when he got home and spoke to the cat, he called him a fat, furry, fatherless feline (among other things!).

Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm - Winston Churchill

It is time to admit that I am a failure, I know that because Robbie told me so loud and clear. I picked him up when I finished work yesterday evening so it was passed 9pm when we got home. The cats were not impressed, they are very good at telling the time (thanks to Robbie's efforts) and they knew that their dinner was late. The loudest complaints were coming from Shadow the guinea pig. I am not aware that Robbie has been actively teaching Shadow to tell the time, perhaps guinea pigs have an innate sense of time or perhaps she just loves to eat whatever the time.


Robbie and the cats disappeared into the kitchen; it was hard to work out if he was feeding them or trying to extend their vocabulary! A little later Robbie emerged from the kitchen holding a plastic bag with a few flecks of green in it. The clues were there, the expression, the hand on the hip, not to mention the expletives from the kitchen - he was not a happy chap. The plastic bag had once contained curly kale, but except for tiny traces of green it was now empty. He waved the bag at me and said "now what am I going to do?". It took me a moment to compose my features because there was something vaguely ridiculous about Robbie who is not noted for his love of 'greens' getting so upset about a deficiency in the curly kale department. Before I could say anything he said "what am I going to say to the guinea pig". I took a deep breath and said that we had other greens, carrots and apples as well as her dried food and hay, so it was unlikely that she would starve. Unbelievably he walked over to the guinea pig to show her the empty bag and to apologise on my behalf for running out of curly kale. I don't think she took too much notice, she was too busy tucking into an apple and her dried food. 


As soon as I finished work today I dashed to the supermarket and we now have an ample supply of curly kale. After all I don't want the guinea pig to think that I'm a failure!

White Rabbits

Photo by Fish

When I was a child I was always told that on the first of the month the very first thing I should say was 'white rabbits'. It never really made any sense to me, but apparently this ritual somehow brought good luck. I guess I have never been superstitious, I couldn't imagine how a white rabbit could bring good luck. We had pet rabbits when I was young, mine was black and white female with attitude (all the women in our family are a force to be reckoned with) and my brothers was a big placid white rabbit called Skippy. He was a big softy, he was gentle and he liked to be petted there was just one problem, he didn't like my grandma. Their cages were mounted on the wall one above the other with Skippy on top. My grandma was not very tall (under 5ft) so she had to reach up to Skippy's cage  when she went out to feed the rabbits. Skippy would do a turn jump and urinate on her head every time he saw her. That particular white rabbit certainly didn't bring my grandma much luck and he made life miserable for us too because my grandma had plenty to say about it - we never heard the last of it!


When I began this entry it was my intention to write about a different white rabbit. The rabbit in question appeared in our garden a few days ago much to my son's amusement. He thinks I have some sort of Dr Dolittle thing going on, after all most people don't have white rabbits turning up at their back door uninvited. We still have our feline lodger, she turned up and just moved in and of course Dave turned up as a stray a few years ago. According to the vet 'the lodger' is a probably a long term stray, we haven't been able to find her original owners so we are trying to find a new home for her. Fortunately the white rabbit was easier to deal with, it lived in the road behind us, but it had decided to make a tour of local gardens. Thanks to my son it was caught and returned to the safety of it's own garden. Robbie wasn't at home when the rabbit turned up, but when he heard about it he vowed that if one more animal moves in with us he would move out!

One cat just leads to another - Ernest Hemingway

According to my husband I have some sort of 'weird magnet' that makes me an interesting target for assorted 'odd bods'. He does have a point even when I visit new places I seem to attract the 'square pegs' of this world. Last autumn I visited the Severn Valley Railway for the first time, as I stood in Kidderminster  Station chatting to Robbie a little man (he was considerably shorter than me) entered the station area from the platform and marched straight up to me, shook my hand and launched in to a long explanation of why steam trains are better than diesels. Suddenly he stopped talking about trains, informed me that he had important things to do and marched off in the direction of the refreshment room. Robbie thought it was very amusing that the man singled me out when he had a whole crowd of people to choose from. 


I had a similar odd experience earlier this week. I gave my daughter a lift to work, on the other side of town. Her office is located in an area that was once a village but it got swallowed up by the town many years ago. I dropped her off, turned the car around and I was just about to pull away when a middle aged man approached the car and knocked on my window. He didn't look like a mad axe man so I opened the window a little and he asked me if I would like to take him to town. I was rather shocked, I am not in the habit of picking up strange men especially before 9am! I told him that I was not going to town, he said "never mind, I didn't really want to go to town anyway". It may not be a village any more but clearly they have at least one contender for the position of village idiot! 


I don't know why I have such a well developed 'weird magnet' perhaps it is because I find people interesting. A friendly smile costs nothing and makes everyone feel better, very often you find that people who seem a bit odd at first are very interesting when you get to know them. The trouble is I seem to attract the waifs and strays of the animal kingdom too. Looking back through the blog I am reminded that we have had a parade of uninvited guests over the years. A toad once came through the cat flap to visit us. On two separate occasions birds have fallen down the chimney - and lived to tell the tale because I went to to considerable trouble to rescue them. One was a collared dove and the other was a huge and rather stupid pigeon. Then there was Dave the cat, he turned up ill and exhausted and set up home in one of our recycling boxes - he is still here! Now there is 'Bernard' the cat who kept coming in and hiding in the utility room, she is still here too.


The problem is that I don't have infinite resources. When Dave found us a few years ago we were strictly a one cat family, but he was so poorly and so much in need of someone to care about him that before I knew what had happened we had become a two cat family. I had no idea how much time effort and money it would take to restore him to health. He is now very much part of the family, in fact he thinks that he runs the house. He and Oreo are good friends and we love them, but they are expensive to to maintain and looking after them is time consuming. Bernard is really sweet and she is becoming less timid but we really can't cope with a third cat. I can't turn her out and all my efforts to find her original owner have proved fruitless, so we really have to find a new home for her.
According to the vet she is about 3 and in good health. She is very clean, we haven't had a single accident since she moved in. She is timid but she enjoys attention, she just needs gain trust in the people around her. She is scared of other cats and she tends to hiss if they go too near her, but she is not vicious, she just keeps out of their way. Please contact me if you know anyone who can offer her a loving home.

The man who reads nothing at all is better educated than the man who reads nothing but newspapers - Thomas Jefferson

There are many things that I love about Robbie, but his choice of newspaper is is not one of them. I detest the thing I resent the waste of paper and I resent the waste of money, I would rather he spent it on a railway magazine, even if he spent it on  Lego or any of his other many and varied obsessions it wouldn't seem so pointless. I have managed to change or modify many things about Robbie over the years, but he remains stubbornly attached to his limp lefty newspaper, so I do my best to ignore it.

Yesterday evening we settled down in the lounge, me with my laptop and Robbie across the room with his newspaper. I was lost in my own little world writing the blog when I glanced up to see Robbie holding his phone out to the cat, and more worrying still the cat was looking at it as if he was reading a text! I asked Robbie what he was doing and with a totally serious expression he said that he was showing the cat the time to prove that he had to wait another hour until feeding time. 

I shook my head in disbelief and settled back to writing the blog. A little later completely out of the blue Robbie asked "How much does mum pay for David's socks these days". It seemed such an odd question that I had to ask him to repeat it in case I hadn't heard him properly. I told Robbie that I have never given a passing thought to the price of my step father's socks - but thanks to Robbie I have now! Once he get's started on a subject there is no stopping him and I heard all about the advantages of loose top socks, a very good deal he had spotted; the price, the colour, it went on an on until I begged him to stop.

Finally he was quiet and I went back to what I was doing. Peace reigned for a little while, then Robbie's voice rang out asking "Have you noticed that you don't often see radishes in the supermarket these days?" I thought about it for a minute and decided to try my luck with a one word answer - no! It was worth a try, but it just encouraged him to provide more radish related information. I listened for a while but I really couldn't summon up much interest in radishes. I asked if he had ever eaten a radish and he informed me that he hadn't. I informed him that he hadn't missed much! I told him that if he was that interested I would buy him some radishes, but he quickly declined and told me that it just was something he had been reading about. 

So now yo know why I dislike that dratted newspaper, it puts ridiculous ideas in his head!

First Catch Your Cat .......................

The saga of the cat continues, every time we put her out she sits outside meowing all day and all night, then just when you notice that it has all gone quiet you realise that she has broken in again! We can't go on like this so I decided that today I was going to take her to the vet to see if she has been chipped. There were just two small problems, catching her and getting her into the cat carrier. 


Yesterday evening my son and daughter caught her - eventually! She had hidden herself behind the fittings in the utility room again and it took forever to coax her out. Finally she was confined to the kitchen (where we hoped she wouldn't be able too hide, but she had other plans. She made her escape and this morning she had to be coaxed out from under a bed! 


Once again she was confined to kitchen and when the rest of the family had been despatched to work and school, I was left to get her into the cat carrier. There was just one problem the cat had decided that there was no way that it was getting into the cat carrier. She grew several extra legs (or at least it seemed like that), she did some amazing gymnastics, the only thing she didn't do was get into the cat carrier. Then after about ten failed attempts I managed to get her in and lock the door of the carrier behind her. I took a few minutes to calm her and let her get used to the carrier before heading off to the vet.


According to the vet she is a female and aged about three. She is not significantly under weight, but she is timid. She is not on any missing lists, I have checked with every group in the area, so the vet thinks that the best thing to do is to look for another home for her.                     

Cat Wars

Since just before Christmas we have been targeted by a rather beautiful cat. It kept getting in through our cat flap and hiding in the utility room. Getting it to leave proved easier said than done, each time we thought it had gone we locked the cat flap and blocked it up but within a day the cat would reappear as if by magic. I began to think that either it was a time traveller or a ghost, but the muddy footprints and mess that betrayed it's presence suggested that it was all too real. The utility room houses an accumulation of clutter that needs to be kept but doesn't really have a home, everything from deckchairs to the cat carrier. Robbie was afraid that it would hide behind the fittings or the general clutter and die of starvation, but it is still very much alive.


It would meow at the kitchen door asking to be let in but when we opened the door to the utility room it would vanish behind the fittings again. It became a bit of a myth, we could hear it, we see it's footprints but we never saw more than the tip of it's tail vanishing behind the shelves. Then last Thursday it came back again, and it had a swearing match with Dave (the cat) through the door that connects the kitchen with the utility room. That was the last straw, my daughter decided that something had to be done, but being a busy young woman she set her brother the task of catching the cat. It took him all evening but eventually the cat was caught and found to be healthy and apparently well fed. Having made sure that it could not get back in we evicted it in the hope that it would go home, but it sat by the window all night and meowed loudly. 

The cat is a very unusual colour, from a distance it looks as if it should be a ginger tabby but it has created just in 'grey scale'. On closer inspection it has a faded ginger colour mixed with grey and black, with two white feet and white under it's chin and down it's chest. So I think that makes it a tortoiseshell of sorts. I have read that it is very unusual to get a male tortoiseshell so it is probably a girl (it is not keen to let me inspect it from that angle) but I think it looks like a male. It was too complicated to keep calling it 'the cat' because we have two cats of our own, so we have called it Bernard after Nursie in Blackadder, a woman with a man's name.


We congratulated ourselves because we could not hear the cat meowing outside on Friday night, but our celebrations proved premature. A trip to the freezer (in the utility room) on Saturday revealed the truth - the cat has got in again!! It is unbelievable, I have no idea why it has chosen us. Robbie's cousin said "This kind of thing is going to happen when Robbie and Dave start surfing the internet looking for ginger cats..."

Teaching an Old Cat New Tricks

I saw far too much of the station car park last week, Robbie was working impossibly long hours and he was in so much pain that getting home on his own really wasn't an option. Thanks to the 'rancid green machines' (which are the bane of Robbie's life) I had plenty of time to take in all the 'delights' of Northampton Station. In fact I could probably have read the whole of War and Peace during my evening sojourns at the station. So by the time we got home and and got a meal on the table, Robbie was nodding off before his fork reached his mouth, like the dormouse at the Mad Hatter's tea party in Alice in Wonderland. 

It seemed as if the fun and closeness of the week before was just a distant dream but when life is tough and stressful, you have to take pleasure in the little things and the fleeting moments of fun. One evening after our meal I came into the lounge and was surprised to find Robbie wide awake and sitting at his computer. I was even more surprised to see Dave the cat sitting on his lap with his front paws leaning on the table, apparently looking at the computer screen. I told Robbie to "get that cat away from the table" but both he and the cat ignored me - nothing new there. As I sat down I realised that Robbie was talking to the cat comments such as "look at that one" and "this one is even better". Curiosity got the better of me and I walked over to see what they were doing. To my amazement they were looking at pictures of ginger cats! One thing is certain, there is no one in the world quite like Robbie and I am proud of him for so many reasons, but most of all for being true to himself. 

Choose Your Battles Carefully

My son needed a lift home yesterday evening so we got back to the house together to find Robbie feuding with the cat. Apparently the cat had committed a terrible sin and Robbie was still running through his whole (extensive) range of insults. The cat was less vocal, but he was still winning on points because the looks that he was giving Robbie spoke volumes and it really didn't need to tell us what the cat was thinking at that moment! Both retreated to their respective corners, both still bristling with indignation and we returned to what passes for normality in our house. 


I was busy getting on with some writing and trying not to notice that my son was watching total junk on the television and I was only vaguely aware of what was going on in the room. Suddenly everything seemed to go quite and I became aware that a scantily clad Robbie was creeping across the room as if he was stalking prey. Robbie doesn't do anything quietly and he is not so good at stealth either - even when he thinks I don't know I usually do! It was a comical sight, almost like a scene from a cartoon, Robbie creeping across the room in slow motion stalking the cat. Apparently the cat had spotted Robbie's unattended (and empty) plate on the table and had headed in that direction to take a look. Robbie and the cat met at the table and some complicated footwork followed; as I watched Robbie it looked like a cross between a football tackle and a Cossack dance. The next thing I knew he was holding the cat in the air and telling him that he was a thieving fatherless feline. What the cat said doesn't bear repeating, he may not have any teeth but there is nothing wrong with his claws and Robbie was pushing his luck. He put the cat down and it beat a hasty retreat to the relative sanity of the hall. 

I think Robbie had a lucky escape this time, but that better be the end of it because I have no intention of taking him to casualty and explaining to the doctor that he got injured because he was arguing with the cat in his underwear!

Apparently Size Does Matter!

Yesterday evening I was sitting quietly in the lounge doing some writing when I noticed out of the corner of my eye that Robbie was loitering by the fruit bowl for a suspiciously long time. I turned to look and caught him measuring bananas. I really should know better by now, but I couldn't help asking why. He told me that he was selecting a banana to fit into his banana carrier for work tomorrow. I knew this would happen, before long he will expect me to check the dimensions of the bananas in the supermarket, or even worse he will get himself arrested for measuring bananas at the supermarket! When he came home from work today he cheerfully announced that he had been to another department at work to show the women his banana carrier  - I wonder what they thought!

I had some very happy news yesterday, I have a new nephew. He arrived a little early but he and his mum are fine. His big brother who is three had been hoping for a sister and he asked then to take the baby back and exchange it for a girl! I expect he will soon get used to his baby brother. They kept us waiting until today for news of a name, I rather like their choice but my brother seemed lost for words (a very rare event) when I reminded him that he had named his son after my cat!