It takes as much energy to wish as it does to plan - Eleanor Roosevelt

One of the nice things about Robbie working for himself is that sometimes he can have a day off during the week. It makes up for all those early mornings and late nights. Usually when he has time off we try to enjoy the day together, but that wasn't possible today because this is a very busy week for me, so work had to come first. 

Robbie had an appointment at the Apple shop in Milton Keynes, to have his i-pad checked out, but he didn't fancy going there by train because it is a very long walk to the shopping centre. He decided to take this chance to try out the Stagecoach Gold (Enviro 400) bus service to Milton Keynes. He wasn't impressed with the design he said it was a bumpy journey and the seats creaked and rattled, but he liked the free Wi-Fi.

I didn't hear from Robbie for most of the morning then  I got a brief text to say that his i-pad problem had been resolved. A bit later I logged on to check my email account and then I had a quick look at facebook. Robbie had found his way to the Lego shop and he'd created 3 'unique' Lego figures, the evidence was posted on facebook for all to see. I was deeply troubled by his creations, the first one seemed to be a short legged version of Robbie, the second was a colour blind woman armed with a circular saw and the third was a man apparently wearing a hard hat and carrying an implausibly large banana. It left me wondering what goes on in Robbie's head and I remarked to the cat that he could probably keep a psychiatrist fully occupied for years! One of his friends commented that counselling is available, but another friend responded "I think counselling is a little late. Besides who would want to change Robbie? We need a few Robbies in the grey old world".   

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Many a small thing has been made large by the right kind of advertising. Mark Twain

Yesterday evening I put a huge smile on Robbie's face - I brought home several packs of the newly released Lego Olympic Minifigures. He had been waiting for them to be released and they turned up several days early, so when I gave them to him he was really surprised. He sat down at the table with a cup of coffee and set about making his first Olympic minifigures. His little expressions of excitement caused my son and daughter to shake their heads and exchange exasperated looks. My son made two posts on facebook which supped up the situation perfectly.

"You know you're set out for a career in mental health care when your stepdad sits in the corner calling a Lego man beautiful...and you don't question it"

"I would worry when my stepdad says he can feel the difference between a weightlifter and a an athlete... Until I realise he is on about Lego men."

As far as I am concerned it is harmless, it is not especially expensive and it gives the kids something new to disapprove of, it takes the 'spotlight' of my perceived failings. When you think of it that way the minifigures seem much less irritating! 

The rabbit has a shiny nose as nature does intend, because it has a powder puff at the other end

The rhyme in the title is one that I learnt in childhood - before I moved on to more dubious playground rhymes! Judging by Robbie's recent difficulty when building the Lego figure in a rabbit suit, he probably didn't learn that little rhyme. 

One of our regular blog readers has asked for a picture of Robbie's version of the rabbit suit figure, so here it is. I am surprised that he didn't notice that the arms were on backwards, but more to the point what did he think the tail was? The bunny version of a fig leaf perhaps, or perhaps it was a Scottish rabbit with the bunny version of a sporran! 

Taking another look at this minifigure had made me wonder if someone at Lego has a slightly warped sense of humour, that rabbit is holding an implausibly large carrot, and the gorilla suit figure from a previous minifigure series is armed with a banana of equally magnificent proportions! 

The Wrong Head

After the drama of the Lego men on Sunday, I was quite literally left to pick up the pieces. By Sunday evening Robbie had lovingly restored most of the Lego people to their original state but there was still a small jar of parts that required attention. 

As soon as Robbie had been despatched to work, I settled down to solve the puzzle. Robbie had most of the body parts for the palace guard but it was the wrong head. So at 6.20 am I was looking at mug shots of Lego men on the computer trying to identify the 'wrong' head. Just before 7am I finally identified the head, it was the head of the man in the dinosaur suit. The dinosaur was not among the 'downstairs' Lego people and a quick trip to the bookcase to inspect the the 'upstairs' Lego men revealed that he wasn't there either. However the head of the palace guard had mysteriously reappeared, placed neatly in front of the top row of minifigures.


It didn't require a crystal ball to work out who was responsible. I woke my son and threatened him with cruel and unusual punishment if the dinosaur didn't reappear right now - it did!! It is easier to deal with my son when Robbie is not around because I don't have an echo. I explained to him that I understood that he may have thought it was funny at first, but it had upset Robbie and caused me untold grief so now it had to be put right without any more fuss. He went back to check his room but he came back empty handed saying that he was sure that there were no more 'hostages'.


I always have plenty to do before heading off to work, but on Monday as well as dealing with the food shopping and the laundry, I had to sort out the Lego men. Believe it or not I found a site that sells spare parts for Lego minifigures. I put in an order to replace a missing baseball bat, graduation certificate, and helmet and I bought some spare bases. I don't think my son was responsible for most of these things, they probably went up the hoover (over time not all together) but I am not going to tell Robbie that or he will hide the hoover!


I also catalogued every single figure and noted the accessories that it should have, so that in future Robbie can check them whenever the mood takes him.  Now hopefully I can stop thinking about minifigures for a while otherwise I really might scream!! Just for once it would be nice to have an uneventful few days.

The Naming of Parts

Sunday morning should be quiet and harmonious, especially on mother's day, but it wasn't. Robbie's rather splendid birthday card must have put ideas into my son's head because Robbie awoke to find that his Lego men had been interfered with, legs, heads hats and hair had been reassigned to different bodies leaving a very odd looking crew. To say that Robbie was incandescent with rage would be a gross understatement! He has been rampaging around like a troll with tooth ache.

He has been on the internet checking the design of each mini figure to make sure that each head was reunited with the correct body parts and accessories. He got on his hands and knees and crawled around the floor in search of missing body parts. For some reason the act of getting on his knees caused him to begin chanting, he ran through every expletive and insult in his vocabulary (and a few that weren't). When I opened the bedroom door I almost jumped out of my skin to find him on his hands and knees apparently worshipping the minifigures on the bookcase. Having run out of expletives he was running through a selection of dark threats and insults. It is the second time this week that his actions have left me speechless. I just stood there wondering if it was time to call for the men in white coats. He looked up and announced that he had a headless guardsman and the baseball player had lost his bat. I have a feeling it is going to be a very long day!!

On Parade?

When we got back from holiday I had so much to write about that I forgot to mention the guard of honour that greeted us. When we first got into the house things were a bit chaotic and it wasn't until I sat down later on that I noticed that there was a line of Lego minifigures standing to attention on top of the unit in the lounge. I didn't think much of it until Robbie commented darkly that someone had been playing with his Lego figures. I thought that was unlikely, when I asked the possible culprits the reason for line up proved rather ordinary. I had asked them to tidy the lounge and they had collected up members of Robbie's mini gang from various places in the lounge and put them all together on the unit in the hope that Robbie would put them away upstairs. I know that Robbie is 'unique' but it feels back to front to have the children telling their step father to put his toys away!

Robbie was late home yesterday so I met him on my way back from work. He nearly burst with excitement when he went to put his bags in the back of the car and he saw that I had bought him a Lego minifigure bag from Toys R Us. His excitement was out of all proportion to the cost of the bag, he even took a photo of it and posted it on Facebook!