Raising a Glass

Robbie bought me the most amazing present today, it didn't cost a fortune but it put a huge smile on my face. I could hardly believe my eyes when I picked him up this evening and he presented me with a 2 litre bottle of my favourite brand of Root Beer. In terms of calories there is probably a whole month of wickedness packed into this bottle but I don't care, I love Root Beer and I feel like celebrating (I don't drink alcohol so celebrating with Root Beer suits me very well). The other good thing about Root Beer is that no one else in the family likes it so I don't have to share! Robbie is happy too because I reminded him that he still has a few bottles of Uncle Stuart's real ale stashed away, we bought them from Wroxham Barns in August while we were on holiday when today was little more than a dream. Back then it felt like a very big step to contemplate walking away from a job that he had loved and a company that meant so much to him, but deep down I think we knew that the time was right to move on. 

So much has happened since then; Robbie has said a fond farewell to his friends at Cross Country, closed the door on that chapter of his life and finally after lots of hard work and mountains of red tape the new chapter of his working life has finally begun. I think it will surprise a few people, in fact I think it will surprise a lot of people because there have been quite a few rumours about what Robbie will do next and none of them were right! I am very pleased about the way things have worked out, but it is not my news to share (and I never write in detail about work on the blog) so if you want the details you will have to ask Robbie.

Moving On

There has been a long silence on the blog, over a week of saying nothing I wasn't able to talk about something that was happening, hence the reason for my silence but at last I can speak again. Robbie made the difficult decision that after almost fifteen years it was time to leave the company that he works for and set his sights on pastures new. It has been a very big decision and it has occupied our thoughts for months, but it was very important to do things properly and I couldn't mention it on the blog until everything was agreed with his employer and his departure had been announced. He is still technically with the company for a few weeks longer, but he is now using up leave, his last working day was last Friday.

In the weeks leading up to his departure there were several important jobs to be done including emptying his cupboard and his desk. It sounds simple enough doesn't it, but this is Robbie that we are talking about! It took a huge amount of effort but thanks to the effort of two wonderful 'helpers' his cupboard was emptied - it is just as well that my Ford Galaxy has the rear seats removed because the contents of his cupboard filled the car. I thought that was the end of it but more bags and boxes followed as he emptied his desk - even a tardis couldn't hold that much 'stuff' so we now have a a lifetime of timetables that were taking up house room. It seems that he has several copies of every leaflet ever published by a train company, he also has the largest mug collection known to man and other sundry 'junk' that will fill at least 20 archive boxes!! By junk I mean old tickets, reservation slips and assorted stuff that 'normal' people would throw away. I have tried to be understanding but it is difficult, I feel as if I am drowning in clutter. I am ashamed to admit that you can't actually see our garage any more, the utility room has become a store room and all things railway related have invaded the bedroom!! Just occasionally I crave a a bit of 'normality'. When I told Robbie how I felt he told me that in 100 years time it will be an important historical archive. I wasn't as reassured by that as he expected, after all in 100 years (or even 50 years) I will not be around.

“One thing only I know, and that is that I know nothing.” – Socrates.

Being the parent of a teenager certainly keeps you 'real'. There was a time in my 20s and 30s when I thought  that I was reasonably intelligent with a fairly wide general knowledge. There was a time when my children were little that they looked up to me and trusted me to answer all their questions, but now they treat me as if I know nothing. My son is always keen to share his 'vast knowledge of life' accumulated over 17 years! To be fair he does have a wide general knowledge, but like most young people he only sees things in black and white, he will need to notch up a few more years before he starts to see shades of grey and then he will gradually realise how much he doesn't know. Until then he is content to tease me abort my astounding ignorance. I am not very good at sitting still and I have never been terribly interested in films and television and with one or two notable exceptions I have no interest whatsoever in sport so it is hardly surprising that I do not know the names of actors or sports personalities. Not so long ago my son decided to test me to find out exactly how challenged I am when it comes to knowing who does what. The whole family roared with laughter when I though that George Clooney could be a golfer, apparently he is an actor. I don't mind the teasing, after all if we did a similar test on history, poetry, literature or various other things I am fairly sure that I would know more than them!

Recently I encountered a woman who told me that she intended to return the game that she had bought for £32.99 the previous day because it was not fit for purpose. I asked what was wrong with it and she said that the questions were much to hard (the game was age 12 to adult). I must have looked a bit sceptical because she told me what some of the questions were.

- Who was Nebuchadnezzar

- What is an archipelago

- Who was Samuel Pepys

I was able to answer all the questions so she posed a few more which I also answered correctly. It was probably just luck that she chose questions that I was able to answer, but I was deeply offended when she told me that I only knew the answers because I am old! I thought (but didn't say) that old or not, I would not wish to publicise my ignorance by returning a game because it was too difficult! Maybe I am old, but I like to think that I could answer the questions because I have a wide general knowledge and I had a good education.

These little episodes along with the start of an annual recruitment phase at the company I work for has led me to realise that it takes all sorts to make a world - and it takes all sorts to make a good workforce. A group of people with different and complementary skills (and personalities) will make a stronger and more competent workforce. Only a fool appoints in his/her own image.

Decisions, Decisions.

It seems as if the blog has focussed a lot on aches and pains recently, I try not to sound too gloomy, but as I write about the ordinary events of family life it is hard to avoid writing about something as important as Robbie's struggle with back and leg pain. Over recent years his legs have misbehaved more and more frequently (that is true of the rest of him too - but that's another story!). He has written off so many pairs of trousers and jackets, but every cloud has a silver lining - I suspect he is single-handedly responsible for the improvement in Marks and Spencer's profits.

For quite a long time I have been trying to persuade Robbie to take his health more seriously and to make some adjustments in his life to make things a little easier. To be honest I get more attention when I talk to the dog (and she is deaf!) but finally we have reach the point where Robbie has had to take stock and admit that even a superhero would struggle to cope with the wide range of commitments that he was trying to cope with.

As well as a demanding job and a difficult journey to work every day, he had his rail tours, gigs, various union responsibilities, family commitments, a demanding wife, and one or two other little diversions that he would kill me if I mentioned on the b

log (yes even worse than milk floats!). Anyway Robbie has reluctantly admitted that he has to put his health and his family first. Sometimes just getting to work is a real struggle, but he never gives up, he loves his job, and he puts his heart and soul into his work, so that has to come first, before any of his other activities. He loves his trains too, I am sure if he had to choose between me and a deltic he would the deltic! Never mind, I know my place! He couldn't give up his trains and his rail tours, it would be cruel to expect him to do that, but he has promised to be more realistic about how much he can do.

So that leaves gigs and the union. In his heart Robbie knows that gigs will not figure very much in his future, but he isn't quite ready to put that into words. He would't be able to stand for that long and that ridiculous bouncing up and down thing that he used to do has to stay firmly in the past. I know it is hard, but I am sure we can find other ways for him to enjoy his music (I use the term music in it's broadest sense, to me the stuff he likes is just noise). The union was the most difficult decision of all. I make no secret of the fact that I disapprove of his union involvement, but I love Robbie and I am proud of the work he has done to support his colleagues in many different ways. Recently he has been very unhappy and stressed because there have been times when his health has stopped him from fulfilling his union responsibilities and there have been even more times

when his union work has encroached on his paid work to an unacceptable degree. In the end the union pressures were too much to cope with and something had to give. It was such a hard decision but Robbie has finally decided to step aside from his union roles and let others take their turn.

So if you see Robbie he could use a few friendly words because it has been a difficult few weeks, but beware, he doesn't like people to make a fuss so a dodgy joke or a chat about trains would be

far more welcome than an excess of sympathy. He may have had to face a few setbacks, but in his head he still thinks he is Superman!

Light At The End of the Tunnel

This evening I begged Robbie to apply for another job and finally he seems to be seeing things my way. He has always loved his work and I know it will be hard for him to contemplate moving on, but even he has had to recognise that things haven't been so good for a while. He seems to be constantly under pressure and it is impacting on our home life. I hardly ever see him and when I do I only have to turn away for a second and when I look back he is sound asleep! There has to be a work life balance and at the moment the scales are weighed down by the pressures of work. As I said in my last post, you only get have one life and living well is what matters most. It is easy to get stuck in a rut but it is a little more difficult to acknowledge it and do something about it.

Not Entirely Forgiven! 19.09.2007

Robbie headed off to work still feeling a little sorry for himself and not entirely forgiven. A few weeks ago I asked him how old his colleague Richard was, at first he shrugged and said 'indeterminate' then he shrugged and said that he was about the same age as me. Having read a recent comment from Richard where he admitted to being almost 60, Robbie realised that he was in a hole (bit of an understatement!) and started digging furiously. He assures me that Richard looked very good for his age. I suppose that there is a vague possibility that he has a painting in the attic, but it seems far more likely that life with Robbie has aged me dramatically! If you are wondering about my age, I'm younger than George Clooney. Robbie has meetings in London today so he can finally collect Sam's lost jacket from Euston. The saga with the car continues, I am feeling far too frustrated about it to write any more on that subject now. I will update you when I have more information.

Laura doesn't usually get much of a mention in the blog, but she has had a good few days so it is nice to have something positive to write about. She has got a weekend job at a large toy superstore and she starts her training tomorrow evening. Emily worked for the same company, but as she is off to university she will only work for them during the holidays from now on. I think it does the girls good to learn the value of money and to get some idea of real world, as long as they keep things in proportion and don't let it get in the way of their studies.

She got tickets to go to the Paul O'Grady Show in London, it wouldn't fill me with enthusiasm but Laura was really excited about it. She rang me after the show to tell me that she had been given a nodding Buster (dog). I wish I had known that a nodding dog would have given her such pleasure, I could have saved a fortune on Christmas and birthday presents over the years!

Robbie is going to a concert this evening, a group called Blood Red Shoes, the girls will be out too, so Sam and I will have a nice quiet evening.

Ambition 03.08.07

According to my children I am very old fashioned. The reason for this sweeping statement was because I had asked the girls what they hoped for as an eventual career. To them it seems years away, but I don't think it is so unreasonable to expect someone who is about to go to university to have given a little thought to career options. Apparently people don't do that these days. This set me thinking, I have an old postcard with wandering footprints on it with the words 'People who don't know where they are going usually end up somewhere else". I guess that is true with careers as much as anything else. The high hopes of childhood often diminish and people settle for something very different. I just want the girls to make the most of every opportunity because it is so much more difficult to change career or undertake further training later in life when you are tied by financial commitments.

For much of my childhood I wanted to be a farmer or a writer, my eventual career has been very different. My very first ambition was to be a news reader, I was only very small and I used to sit in the bath holding one of those old fashioned shower attachments that fitted onto the taps as if it was a microphone, I would make up all sorts of news and pretend I was on the Radio. On the subject of microphones, when Laura was little she wanted to be a Spice Girl, but she will kill me for mentioning it. Robbie wanted to be a lorry driver because he liked lorries, so he hasn't strayed too far from his original aspirations, it seems his passion for trains has served him well because he loves his work. Sam's first ambition was to be a trolley pusher at the supermarket. At some point a well meaning aunt suggested he may like to be a vet instead because he is very good with animals, but Sam declined claiming that he only liked animals from the outside not from the inside! He then went on to his spy phase, there was a brief period of wanting to be a super hero, then he wanted to be a cartoonist. He still has a strong interest in films and he has had various thoughts about careers in the film industry. I wonder what his future will hold.

So what is my ambition now? Fairly simple really, to grow old disgracefully and to write.