A Stressful Week

The last week was one of the most stressful for a long time, there were a number of things going on but mostly we were worried about my mum, she was in hospital all week following her fall. I didn't know which way to turn, I needed to spend time with my mum and support her, but I also needed to help my step father who is ill and frail and not used to being on his own. Then there were the ordinary demands of life to be considered, going to work, feeding the family and trying my best to keep on top of the house work. I seemed to rush from one task to the next with no time to stop and think – perhaps that was a good thing! 

My mum had a deep wound on her head which was surrounded by a large area of severe bruising; they were worried that the force of my mum’s fall may have caused a bleed into the brain. The wait for the brain scan seemed endless, but thankfully it showed that we have hard heads in our family, there was no damage to her brain. More tests were necessary to determine why she blacked out, it seems her blood pressure is very high but at times her pulse becomes dangerously low. This may necessitate a pacemaker, but in the short term she has been sent home to recover from her fall and to stabilise her blood pressure with medication. 

We picked her up from hospital on Friday evening and settled her in at home before going home to pack the car and do all the last minute jobs in preparation for our holiday. I was disconcerted but too tired to argue when Robbie announced that he was packing the Lego men. It left me wondering about his priorities because at that stage he still hadn’t packed his underwear!

Choose Your Battles Carefully

My son needed a lift home yesterday evening so we got back to the house together to find Robbie feuding with the cat. Apparently the cat had committed a terrible sin and Robbie was still running through his whole (extensive) range of insults. The cat was less vocal, but he was still winning on points because the looks that he was giving Robbie spoke volumes and it really didn't need to tell us what the cat was thinking at that moment! Both retreated to their respective corners, both still bristling with indignation and we returned to what passes for normality in our house. 


I was busy getting on with some writing and trying not to notice that my son was watching total junk on the television and I was only vaguely aware of what was going on in the room. Suddenly everything seemed to go quite and I became aware that a scantily clad Robbie was creeping across the room as if he was stalking prey. Robbie doesn't do anything quietly and he is not so good at stealth either - even when he thinks I don't know I usually do! It was a comical sight, almost like a scene from a cartoon, Robbie creeping across the room in slow motion stalking the cat. Apparently the cat had spotted Robbie's unattended (and empty) plate on the table and had headed in that direction to take a look. Robbie and the cat met at the table and some complicated footwork followed; as I watched Robbie it looked like a cross between a football tackle and a Cossack dance. The next thing I knew he was holding the cat in the air and telling him that he was a thieving fatherless feline. What the cat said doesn't bear repeating, he may not have any teeth but there is nothing wrong with his claws and Robbie was pushing his luck. He put the cat down and it beat a hasty retreat to the relative sanity of the hall. 

I think Robbie had a lucky escape this time, but that better be the end of it because I have no intention of taking him to casualty and explaining to the doctor that he got injured because he was arguing with the cat in his underwear!

Underwear Heaven

Don't worry, I am not going to give you too much information and there certainly will not be a photo! After Robbie's recent problems with itchy and irritated legs we have finally found a solution. Having researched the matter on the internet it seemed that sports underwear may provide offer some protection from the irritating fabric of his suit. So Thursday morning found me at a large sports store having an excruciatingly embarrassing conversation about the correct size to buy with a male assistant who looked implausibly young. I bought the said garment, just one pair as they were scarily expensive and I wasn't sure that they would work. Robbie wasn't too sure at first, but having showed off his new knickers to my son he decided to give them a try. Our son says he will need years of therapy to recover!! On Friday Robbie rang me to say that he was in underwear heaven, apparently the new 'smalls' are perfect, like a second skin. We have now ordered more pairs, so I hope we will hear a lot less about sore legs in the coming weeks.

Lost Property!

I had one of those moments where I wanted the ground to swallow me up this afternoon, it happened when Robbie dropped his trousers in the lounge to show me how well fitting his new knickers are. Try thinking Edwardian bathing trunks and you will have a close enough image! I begged him not to show off his underwear to my mum, she is too old for shocks like that, he grudgingly agreed, but then he told me that one of the women who sometimes catches the train with him liked his new pants. I hardly dared to ask, but he admitted that he had showed his travelling companions his new pants on the train, thankfully he was not wearing them at the time! That was only the beginning of the confessions, a long and complicated story tumbled out, apparently he lost his pants on the journey home, but unlike his well travelled trousers they didn't get left on the train, he left them in someone's car! He retrieved them the following day, but I wonder how his travelling companion felt when he caught the train tat morning and asked “did I leave my pants in your car?” That man really needs a minder!

Trouser Trouble

It is a strange life, when Robbie is at home I want to send him back to work and when he is going back to work I want to keep him at home. He has been challenging at times over Christmas, but I wish he had a bit longer at home. On Christmas Day he was still trotting around in his PJ's when my mum, stepfather and brother arrived at lunchtime, a fairly alarming sight especially when you are not expecting it. He eventually got dressed in his cords and his 'Ho, Ho, Homer' T shirt (that slogan proved too tempting for the kids!) but more shocks were in store – his trousers fell down when he was doing the washing up! I thought that was the end of the trouser trouble, but I nearly crashed the car on Tuesday when we were taking my Mum and step father shopping and out of the silence he suddenly announced that he was not wearing underwear! I sincerely hoped he was joking because he was wearing the same pair of cords that had fallen down on Christmas Day, and it was 'geriatric' day at Morrisons - he could have caused mass hysteria! I really don't know what triggers him to speak his thoughts sometimes, but I really wish he wouldn't, I have far too many grey hairs already!

The Bottom Line

Friday morning was one big rush, Robbie was running late again but this time it was planned, he had worked late the previous day before going to see Blood Red Shoes at the Academy in Birmingham. He didn't get back to Northampton until midnight and it was 1am before we got to bed, so it is hardly surprising that he didn't want to get up at 5am. Robbie was still galloping around in his pants when I was trying to get Sam organised, but he managed to get dressed and out of the house in time for his train. It was not the most inspiring vision to start the day, but I managed to banish all thoughts of Robbie's underwear from my mind and get on with the day. Robbie arrived home in a cheerful mood and announced that he'd had a brilliant day because the new pants he was wearing felt so comfortable. I was not quite prepared for such detailed information about his underwear (it's OK, I will spare you the detail) but if that is all it takes to bring a smile to his face I will know what to buy him for Christmas!

Vanishing Act!

Dave the cat had a late afternoon appointment at the vet on Monday, as his infected eye was still looking very uncomfortable. The cat box was put in the kitchen the evening before and Dave took no notice of it until about half an hour before his appointment when I bathed his eye again, he wasn't too impressed by that and when I touched the cat carrier he vanished. After a frantic 15 minute search Laura and I found him hiding in the furthest corner under Emily's bed, he swore menacingly when we found him, but he got to his appointment on time. There are no scratches on the eye so he has some eye drops and the infection should clear up in a few days.

I forgot to mention Robbie's random comments on Sunday, he just can't help himself - wrong time wrong place! He woke me up to tell me about a chap from some railway company or other who has exceptionally long service with the same company (why would I need to know that!). He waited until we went to visit my mum in the afternoon to discuss his favourite pair of pants and why they were such a wonderful fit - some things are best left unimagined!

'Small' Mistakes 13.12.07

Robbie still manages to surprise me occasionally. While I was cooking yesterday evening he was sitting on the floor sorting out the load of washing that had just come out of the tumble dryer. He is much better than I am at pairing up socks and sorting out underwear ready to be delivered to each member of the family. He commented on the make of a pair of pants that belonged to one of the girls. I had never heard of the brand he mentioned and I suggested that he knew far too much about women's underwear. He was unfazed and he went on to tell me he knew because an acquaintance of his wears that brand! He seemed genuinely surprised that I should object to such intimate knowledge of someone he doesn't know particularly well, he just shrugged his shoulders and said that they were chatting about underwear one day. I have often said that Robbie would talk to anyone about anything - here's the proof! I guess it makes a change from talking about trains!!

I put the Christmas tree up yesterday, it is a longer and more complicated job than you would imagine. Finally the tree was up and ready to decorate, I leave that to the children because there is always an argument about how the decoration should be arranged and in particular whose angel should take pride of place on top of the tree. Each year since the children were born I have bought a Christmas tree decoration for each child, nothing too expensive, just something pretty (and not too delicate). I used a coloured DVD marker to write a the year, the child's name and a little message on the base or the back of the decoration. The message usually comments on a milestone or achievement that year, e.g. starting school, able to read, learning an instrument, favourite pop group, etc. I always added 'love from mum and dad'. Now the children each have their own box for their decorations and they read through all the old messages each year as they decorate the tree, the memories and the messages have become very special and the decorations provide little 'snapshots' of their childhood.

When Oreo walked into the lounge and saw the tree his eyes lit up, he was delighted to find that someone had thoughtfully provided him with an indoor climbing frame! He was distracted by a long piece of tinsel that he encountered on his way to the tree. He couldn't be sure if it was alive or dead, so he pounced on it, chased it all around the room and killed it (just to be certain it was dead). Unfortunately the tinsel got caught in Oreo's collar during the struggle and when he realised that he was being followed by a gold sparkly snake, he was seriously spooked. He leapt in the air - and so did the tinsel, he rased around the house as if the devil was on his shoulder and he was closely pursued by the tinsel, eventually I liberated him by stepping on the end of the tinsel. By this time he was too exhausted to climb the tree, but it is only a matter of time before he does. Perhaps this year we will start a new tradition instead of an angel we will have a cat at the top of the christmas tree!

Emergency

Monday 13/8/07 Emergency!

Sam came to have a quiet word in my ear this morning. It appears that between us we had forgotten to pack his smalls and he was seriously short of socks, so a mercy dash was called for. We made a quick trip to North Walsham to kit him out with the essentials. Once assured that his dignity would be preserved he was far more interested in looking at DVD's and we bought him a couple to keep him occupied if we have a rainy day.

Robbie started his jigsaw this evening, he has taken over the table and he is not keen on having any help with it. As you can see from the photo, he was not keen on being interrupted and had to be forced to smile for the photo. Meet Victor Meldrew reincarnated!

Trust Not Restored 20.04.07

Robbie has managed to restore my old AOL and recover most of the lost email, but he hasn't yet restored my trust in him. Last night I didn't feel he was taking the situation seriously enough, and this morning he expected me to be back to normal because most of my mail has been restored - I wasn't! I tried to explain that it felt like a violation and when that fell upon deaf ears I explained I was more upset by him interfering with my email than if I had caught him trying on my underwear. That caught his attention and with a big grin he announced that it fitted perfectly and made him look really good. That has to be a matter of dispute! Sorry Richard, what a thought for a Friday morning, you can read on safely without any more disturbing images being conjured up. I am still feeling upset with Robbie, but at least I have my nice English voice back on AOL and my spell check works in English again. That American accent drove me mad, but I guess it could have been worse it could have had a French accent!

I have had to confiscate one of Robbie's ties. I have always hated it anyway, but wit the local elections looming people would think he was canvassing for votes. Does anyone remember Roger Red Hat from the old school reading scheme, well we almost had Robbie Red Tie!

White Knuckle Ride 20.02.07

One of the things that Sam and Robbie have in common is there ability to take you on a white knuckle ride through the English language. Just when you think you are heading in one direction you are suddenly careering out of control on a totally different track.

Sam goes back to school tomorrow after half term, so being a typical man he was busy dashing off some last minute homework this afternoon. He told me it was English homework and he went on to explain that he needed to finish on a cliff-hanger, but he was having difficulty finding the cliff!!

This evening I was busy typing a letter when I became dimly aware of Laura and Robbie talking about underwear. Suddenly Robbie turned to me with a magazine in his hand and said "I know these are women's, but I wouldn't mind some of these". I could feel my hair standing on end, was my husband telling me he was a tranny. No, he had simply changed subject mid sentence and he was showing me some truly hideous spectacles!

When Robbie came home from work this evening we shared a brief intimate moment and Robbie manage to swerve mid sentence from us to a two minute discrepancy in his train timetable for May. He followed this up with a brief explanation of difficult periods - I knew he was in touch with his feminine side but this was over the top even for him! Guess what, we were back on timetable problems again.

Robbie's Ramblings 01.01.07

I have finally got Robbie to write something for the blog, so today I will be handing over to him. I't's a bit soppy, but not bad for a novice! Just before I go, I must remind you not to worry if you see him shopping for women's underwear in Birmingham. He's not a 'tranny' (as far as I know!) but he has to replace certain white items that he managed to turn grey in the wash!! So over to Robbie.

Well, they says there's a first time for everything.....and writing something for my 'ramblings' is I suppose one of them! Chris has threatened that I can't go to bed until I write something for my blog. I suppose I did well to get away with it for so long!

Christmas has come and gone, and now its time to reflect on yet another wonderful Christmas and New Year with Chris and the children in Northampton. To me, Christmas is all about children and families and being part of this family in Northampton means EVERYTHING to me.

Every Christmas Chris says to me (and I always believe her...d'oh!) that she has only bought me a little present, and she was quite insistant about it this year. You can imagine my face when after the children had opened all their presents there was a red sack in the corner unopened. To my AMAZEMENT it was for me!!

So there I was like a kid again, unwraping my presents....railway DVD's galore, a stationary set, a parker pen set, a coat, Hugo Boss aftershave, an ipod speaker docking station, and........................................a 30GB, black, video ipod!!! These days, there are only a few things that bring tears to my eyes (getting married to Chris to name but one), but when I opened the ipod I couldn't help myself! What a lucky boy I was. It has been another GREAT CHRISTMAS..... and I still have loads of railway DVD's to watch!!