Have you ever found yourself in a situation where you understand every individual word but the sentence still doesn't make sense? Those with experience of building self assembly furniture would probably answer with a resounding yes. Have you come close to tears of frustration when trying to communicate with someone apparently speaks the same language as you? If you have ever had to deal with an overseas call centre the answer is probably yes! For most of us those things may be irritating or even upsetting, but they only happen occasionally and then they are quickly forgotten.
For people with Asperger Syndrome or Autism communication difficulties are a constant challenge. To some extent it is a hidden disability; people with Asperger Syndrome can often be pedantic and obsessive about certain subjects which other people find exhausting or even irritating. They find social interactions difficult because they are not good at reading or predicting situations and they often struggle to interpret emotions or the subtle subtext of what is being said. However these difficulties can be masked to some extent by a wide vocabulary and good linguistic skills, so other people may not realise that the person has not understood. Instead of being understanding, other people can become hostile and angry.
On Saturday I met a 45 year old man who has been the victim of online bullying, because he didn't fit in. He hadn't done anything wrong, he was just a bit obsessive about his favourite subjects which other people found annoying. I felt terribly sad when this chap told me that he knows a lot of people, but he has no friends. We chatted for well over an hour and I realised that he is a very knowledgeable, interesting man who means no harm to anyone. I just want to make a plea from the heart, please don't be too quick to judge people who are a bit different because they may have a hidden disability. It takes all sorts to make a world, and just a little bit of understanding and tolerance makes the world of difference.
I have to acknowledge that I have a weakness, if Robbie wants something I find it very hard to tell him that he can't have it. I have always tried to do my very best for all my family, seeing them happy makes me happy. The difference is that Robbie wants some very odd things at times. I know that I am old and boring - my 'nearest and dearest' remind me of that often enough, but I think most people would admit that Robbie has a rather unique fashion sense, and I really don't have the words to describe his approach to colour, the only word that springs to mind is 'loud'.
Yesterday he announced that his Berghaus jacket has seen better days and it is time to get a new one. He told me he had seen a nice green one and he sent me a link so that I could look at it online. I was pleasantly surprised, it was a deep olive green, it would have looked appropriate with smart clothes but it would have looked good with casual clothes too. I told him that I liked the colour and he looked surprised. He mentioned that I don't like green, but I said that I didn't mind olive green. He looked even more surprised, then he announced that I was looking at the wrong colour. My heart sank when he directed me to his chosen colour - it was pea green! I begged him to reconsider but he said it was beautiful. I only recall one instance of pea green being described as beautiful. In Edward Lear's poem the Owl and the Pussycat went to sea in a beautiful pea-green boat - but they were a very odd pair! As far as I am concerned pea-green looks good on peas, but on anything or anyone else it is a mistake.
I spent the rest of the evening trying to change his mind but I was wasting my breath. Can you imagine what it would look like if he wore that on one of 'rancid green machines' He would clash with the train and scare the passengers! So this is a plea to the select few who have more influence with Robbie than I do (you know who you are). Please take pity on me and persuade him to choose a different colour.
