My son needed a lift home yesterday evening so we got back to the house together to find Robbie feuding with the cat. Apparently the cat had committed a terrible sin and Robbie was still running through his whole (extensive) range of insults. The cat was less vocal, but he was still winning on points because the looks that he was giving Robbie spoke volumes and it really didn't need to tell us what the cat was thinking at that moment! Both retreated to their respective corners, both still bristling with indignation and we returned to what passes for normality in our house.
I was busy getting on with some writing and trying not to notice that my son was watching total junk on the television and I was only vaguely aware of what was going on in the room. Suddenly everything seemed to go quite and I became aware that a scantily clad Robbie was creeping across the room as if he was stalking prey. Robbie doesn't do anything quietly and he is not so good at stealth either - even when he thinks I don't know I usually do! It was a comical sight, almost like a scene from a cartoon, Robbie creeping across the room in slow motion stalking the cat. Apparently the cat had spotted Robbie's unattended (and empty) plate on the table and had headed in that direction to take a look. Robbie and the cat met at the table and some complicated footwork followed; as I watched Robbie it looked like a cross between a football tackle and a Cossack dance. The next thing I knew he was holding the cat in the air and telling him that he was a thieving fatherless feline. What the cat said doesn't bear repeating, he may not have any teeth but there is nothing wrong with his claws and Robbie was pushing his luck. He put the cat down and it beat a hasty retreat to the relative sanity of the hall.
I think Robbie had a lucky escape this time, but that better be the end of it because I have no intention of taking him to casualty and explaining to the doctor that he got injured because he was arguing with the cat in his underwear!
Our dog Meg is a great communicator. If she knows that she is in trouble she walks along with her tail tucked under her chin and her body close to the ground, and if she has to walk past me she will do a wide circle, we never hit her so it must be instinctive behaviour. When she wants something she makes absolutely sure you know about it, she becomes very fussy and affectionate and she keeps walking backwards and forwards and looking at the thing she wants (back door, food cupboard, water bowl, lead etc) until her slow but loveable humans finally get the idea! Robbie is much less subtle, when he wants something he 'creeps' shamefully. I am almost sure that the phone rings differently when he wants something because I can tell instantly, even the little silence before he speaks is different.
Yesterday I got one of those phone calls, he was a bit too loving, there were far too many compliments and he found it even more difficult than usual to get to the point, so I cut through the flattery with a simple “What do you want?” This brought on a bout of stuttering from Robbie, then a painfully drawn out explanation that he had been offered a ticket for Tyseley Open Day in Birmingham, and he would very much like to go. I was a bit disappointed because he was out all last weekend and he has other trips planned so I was hoping for a nice ordinary weekend. He obviously wanted to go because he offered to take me with him – no chance! A railway yard open day is not my sort of thing because it will be attended by the 'socks and sandals brigade' and to be brutally honest that many peculiar people in one place is a bit hard to take! The venue also puts me off, I don't like going to Birmingham, it is too chaotic and it makes me feel despondent. When we are heading to Birmingham on the train I give up hope soon after we pass Rugby, everything starts to look grim and unloved and a close encounter with Birmingham New Street Station is enough to ruin anyone's day!
I told Robbie he could go, he would have only talked about it all weekend anyway, so he may as well go. I will find something to keep me busy on Saturday and when he gets back he will find a list of jobs to keep him out of trouble on Sunday!
