There is no pain so great as the memory of joy in present grief - Aeschylus

To say that we have had a bad few weeks would be an understatement, I wrote before about the horror of receiving a bill for close on £17,000 dating back fourteen years and finding it practically impossible to provide evidence from that long ago to prove what Robbie was doing then and that he was not liable for the bill. The worry about the alleged debt has been crushing and the work involved to challenge it has not only been exhausting it has taken over our lives. However other shattering events have made us realise that our troubles pale into insignificance compared to the sorrow that others have to face. A young girl known to one of my children killed herself a week ago. I can only begin to imagine the total desolation that her parents must feel; it is such a terrible waste of a young and talented life, it is so totally pointless that words fail me.

It seems wrong to write about the death of a pet in the same post as the tragic loss of a young woman on the brink of adulthood. I mean no disrespect, but to us the loss of Megan was extremely painful. A week ago I came home from work to find that she was unsteady on her feet, she could walk, but not very well and she seemed to be having difficulty eating – a sure sign that something was wrong. Meg and Robbie were great friends and like Robbie Meg not only cleared her own plate in record time, she would clear everyone else’s scraps! Meg was about nine months old when we adopted her from a rehoming centre; she was a failed sheepdog - because she was afraid of sheep! She was afraid of all sorts of things, but she was a very good natured dog with a passion for ball games - she could handle a football far better than most of the England team! She was about fifteen and very much part of our family, we knew that she would not last forever, but we were not ready to lose her. That evening it became clear that she had suffered a stroke and the only kind option was to have her put to sleep rather than allow her to suffer. We miss her very much, even the cats miss her, but she had a good life and she brought a lot of happiness to our lives. 

'Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole'.

The Invisible Man Speaks 28.02.08

Well, I finally understand why Network Rail keep their chief executive hidden away from the public. Iain Coucher popped up on Radio 4 this morning to comment on the massive fine imposed on Network Rail by the Rail Regulator. The kindest thing I could say about Iain Coucher is that he lacks presence. There he was with that insipid little voice stuttering and clearing his throat, still trying to shift the blame and justify the unjustifiable. He showed no sign of caring about the disruption to passengers caused by the fiasco at Rugby at New Year, not to mention the additional disruption because they are falling behind with the work. He seemed equally careless about wasting taxpayers money. Perhaps someone should explain to him that in this day and age we are lied to by experts on a daily basis and his attempts at spin were at best feeble. Wouldn't it have been refreshing if he had said, we got it wrong, we let everyone down, we are sorry and we are doing x y and z to put it right, that really would have been worth the headlines.
Listening to the reporting about the £14 million fine imposed on Network Rail it seemed as if I was in a crazy Alice in Wonderland world. I guess the Rail Regulator has his hands tied by the government, but I have met earthworms with more backbone! I don't suppose Network Rail care a jot about the fine, either the government will give them more taxpayer's money so that they can spend what they originally planned or the travelling public will suffer because the Rail Regulator has £14 million of the money that Network Rail should have spent on maintenance and major projects. I think it is called smoke and mirrors!
Personally I would like to see Iain Coucher and his minions spend a day in the stocks outside Euston Station so that they would be forced to listen to the views of commuters, it wouldn't cost much and it would please a lot of people. Assuming that we have to work with modern day punishments I think the only way to get Network Rail to sit up and take notice is to hit senior managers in the pocket. The whole senior management team should lose their bonus and a proportion of salary, it should be possible after all a lowly checkout operator on minimum wage has to make up discrepancies from their salary if the till is short.
Do you remember the fairytale about the emperors new clothes? See what you make of my modern day interpretation.
A Government who cares too much about PR and too little about railways hires swindlers (you know who!) and they promise to build the finest Railway for the cheapest price. This work, they tell Government, is invisible to anyone who was is either stupid or not fit for his position. The Government is nervous about being able to see the work so it creates Network Rail to deal with the swindlers. They see nothing yet praise the work. When the swindlers report that the work will soon be finished, the Government allows itself to take all the glory on a PR campaign. During the course of the campaign, a Train Operating Company shouts out, "But no work has been done!" The public realises the Train Operator is telling the truth and mocks the government. The Government, however, holds it's head high and continues the PR campaign placing all the blame on Network Rail who in turn blame the swindlers. The Government punishes Network Rail by taking away the tax payers money that should have been used to improve the Railway. Network Rail punishes the swindlers by giving them even more contracts!!! The question is, who is the loser?

An Attempt to Justify the Unjustifiable 29.11.07

The rail industry hit the headlines again today for all the wrong reasons. The latest fare increases were announced, and as expected they have increased significantly more than the rate of inflation. Some fares are capped by the government and they will rise by inflation plus 1% but the rest will increase by anything up to 11%. It seemed that every time I turned on the radio or TV a different selection of railway bods were squirming and stuttering in an attempt to justify the unjustifiable! I know the Prime Minister has been doing a whole lot of squirming for different reasons this week, but I think somebody ought to be asking him some probing questions about this too because it has his government's mucky fingerprints all over it. The government wants more trains, more carriages and more people to travel by public transport, great, but what are they doing about it? They are promising a 7% increase in the number of trains, but there is a 40% increase in the number of passengers! If they really believe all the stuff they spout about sustainable public transport and the need to reduce our impact on the environment then they really must put their money where their mouth is! Correction, I mean our money, tax payers money (they just like to pretend it is their money!). To have a coherent public transport system they have to bite the bullet and tax motorists, airlines etc and invest in the railways and in bus services.

I know it is hard for the government to understand, but you can't change things by just talking about it, they actually have to do something to bring about change. I am just an ordinary person and I don't know anything about the railways, but I know when I am being conned and the present situation is little short of exploitation. Many commuters have no choice about the train service they use to get to work and some have no viable option except rail transport, but they are still customers and they are entitled to expect a basic level of service which includes decent station facilities, accurate information, punctuality and a seat! I was amazed to discover that there is usually no penalty for trains being overcrowded and this is not included in the performance criteria of the train operating companies. It is ridiculous to expect rail passengers to pay extortionate fares, because many can and do vote with their feet. I enjoy visiting family in Devon and Cornwall and it is nice to travel by train rather than taking the car but the snag is that once we get there the public transport connections are almost non existent and the return rail fare would cost £548 for me, Robbie, Emily, Laura and Sam! If I drive I add a few miles to the car and I can get up to 7 people there and back on a tank of diesel (about £65). Until this ridiculous situation changes people like me will not use the railways!

Criminal Incompetence! 20.11.07

As I get older I am rarely shocked and I have become used to staggering levels of incompetence from service providers and government department. Today proved to be an exception. I am horrified to find that HMRC has lost a couple of computer disks that were not even encrypted, they were just password protected. Incredibly those disks contained the names, addresses, dates of birth, NI numbers and bank account details of all Child Benefit claimants and their children. Alistair Darling stood at the House of Commons despatch box looking distinctly uncomfortable as he revealed the full extent of the incompetence which led to this loss. Perhaps he thought that wearing that lurid cerise tie would distract peoples attention, or perhaps he is just colour blind, but it would take much more than bad taste to cover up this bit of bad news.

They say there is no evidence that this information has fallen into the wrong hands, but since they have no idea where the disks are there is no evidence that the information has not been stolen. The information would be worth a fortune to criminals. The data protection act seems powerless to protect us from idiots! If we can't trust our government and its departments with our most sensitive details, why should we trust them with anything else? After all this is the latest in a catalogue of errors when it comes to losing personal data, they are starting to look accident prone. I am absolutely certain that the W.I. could do a better job of running the country.

So, while I am worrying about identity theft and potential fraudulent activity against my bank account I can only find one positive comment to make - this is one of the few things that we can't blame Network Rail for!!

All Dressed Up 07.11.07

Sam came home from school feeling deeply aggrieved. Apparently the much detested cross country running has been 'repackaged' and is now timetabled as 'run for fun'. Fun implies a degree of choice and enjoyment but 'run' most certainly does not! Sam confirmed that the new lesson was indistinguishable from cross country, in fact it was so bad that he almost collapsed. Some things never change! My school successfully inoculated me against sport, athletics, swimming, music and latin and now in these allegedly enlightened times Sam's school is doing exactly the same thing to him. Exercise is important, but you can't bully people to exercise, the only way is to encourage them and make it genuinely enjoyable

My schooldays began in the 1960's when times were changing fast - but my school clung to outdated rules and traditions. Our uniform was rigidly enforced, panama hat, blazer, white gloves and gingham dress in summer and Harris tweed coat, winter hat, navy gloves, blouse, tie, skirt and cardigan in winter. We had indoor shoes and outdoor shoes as well as plimsolls and dancing shoes, so much of our day was taken up with changing our shoes. Our regulation hanging purses provided ample opportunity to strangle ourselves, but if we survived until break time they often came undone as we ran around playground causing grazed knees. After break the classroom always smelled of TCP!

Rules were strongly enforced, hat, gloves and outdoor shoes were obligatory when outside, even on a hot summer day. At the end of the school day we had to be checked by a teacher before leaving to ensure that we had our hats and gloves on. We were not allowed to eat in the street under any circumstances, that was an unforgivable sin. We had to participate in a number of ceremonies and rituals each year, church service on Ascension Day, Speech Day, Harvest Festival, Sports Day and the Carol Service. That all sounds very innocent until you consider that we spent days learning how to walk and how to shake hands so that we would be able to accept a winners ribbon on sports day. Harvest Festival and Ascension Day required days of practice and the carol service required us to learn to sing in Latin! I detested all the fuss and those early school memories have inoculated me against all forms of pomp and circumstance. I like things plain, simple and unpretentious.

With that in mind I was very interested to read Jan's blog today. She wrote a fascinating entry about the state opening of parliament and all the ritual and custom involved. Jan quite rightly pointed out how special our traditions are. I found it quite thought provoking as I had never really considered it before, I would be sad to see our traditions lost, but on the other hand it seems a bit ridiculous. It all seems a bit 'Emperor's New Clothes' a lot of pomp and very little substance. I found myself feeling sorry for the Queen, I'm sure she would rather be at home with her feet up watching Judge Judy instead of meeting a load of weird old men wearing tights and fancy dress. She has to sit there and read a speech written by someone else about all the 'good' intentions of her government. This year it wasn't even news, the prime minister announced it all last month. The Queen must have seen so many failed ideas repackaged and dressed up to seem more acceptable to the public. On that subject I wonder why the European Constitution springs so readily to mind! In the end cross country running cannot be made more palatable just by giving it a new name, and schoolboys know when they are being conned - I suspect the British public know when they are being conned too!

A Personal Choice 05.05.07

Do you remember the deal I struck with Robbie to allow him to go to the diesel gala. He completed the first part of the bargain on Thursday and he has another week to complete part two. Thursday was an interesting day, I took Emily to vote for the first time. Listening to her talk about the experiences of her friends (other first time voters) I realised that with all the heavy handed government control of education, they have missed the basics. Nobody has ever explained to them how to vote, I don't mean who to vote for, I mean the process of going to put your cross on a ballot paper. Consequently the vast majority of her friends didn't vote, and of the couple who did, one spoiled her paper and one accidentally voted for the wrong party (because she didn't think that you were allowed to vote for 2 counsellors from the same party!). The right of every adult to have a vote was something our ancestors fought for and it is terribly sad that so many people do not bother to vote. From my point of view, I always seem to end up worse off whoever wins, but that's another story!