A cats got her own opinion of human beings. She don't say much, but you can tell enough to make you anxious not to hear the whole of it --Jerome K. Jerome

If there was such a thing as a Krypton Factor for cats Dave would be a champion. A few nights ago there was a commotion in the kitchen at around 2am but thankfully it was not burglars, it was Dave attacking the cat proof food recycling bin. I put the bin safely out of his way and trudged back to bed. The next morning I came down to find an open food recycling bin and an work of abstract art made from tea bags and crusts set out on the kitchen floor. Dave gave me a penetrating look and I was left in no doubt that he disapproves of cat proof containers. He doesn't eat tea bags and he's not fond of crusts, he was just proving that as far as he is concerned nothing is cat proof. Cats are such wonderful communicators, it only requires a look or an almost imperceptible flick of the tail for Dave to convey absolute contempt. 

As I picked up the debris and then cleaned the kitchen floor I realised how much of my time is taken up attending to the needs of an assortment of animals. We only have three cats, but my mum and stepfather are both frail so I help them with their animals too. Their elderly cat Jessica is beautiful, but she's as wild and unpredictable a tiger and it takes nerves of steel (and protective clothing) to get her into the cat basket when she needs to go to the vet. Shopping for the cat takes far longer than anyone would believe possible because because mum has to examine every flavour and brand of cat food to decide whether Jessica would like it. Then after lots of deliberation she buys the same combination of brands that she always buys!

Lucy is my favourite of mum's three dogs, when she came from Wood Green Animal Shelter she was pathetically thin and afraid of her own shadow, but now she is healthy and happy. One of her parents was a Shih Tzu and the other a Border Collie - an improbable liaison which probably involved a step ladder! She combines the intelligence and behaviour of a (rather neurotic) Border Collie with the build and colouring of a Shih Tzu and despite her difficult past she has a lovely friendly nature. She seems to be especially attached to me, she follows me like a shadow, sits next to me whenever I sit down and when I stop stroking her she nudges my arm with her nose to get my attention - which often results in spilt tea and a disgraced dog! 

Bobby and Misty the other two Shih Tzus are a little younger than Lucy, and completely bonkers. They are brother and sister but Bobby is twice the size of Misty, he is gentle and friendly but Misty is a little spitfire and what she lacks in height she makes up for in attitude. Taking them to the groomers is a nightmare, it's like having chimps in the car, Bobby cries because he has left my mum behind and Misty spends the entire journey telling other road users to go away! She also objects to the car radio, if I turn it on she barks frantically and searches for the people hiding in the car. Needless to say, I prefer not to take them out in the car more often than absolutely necessary! 

Shopping for their food is a nightmare, Bobby is a solid little chap and despite being reassured by the vet that he is the correct weight for his size my mum worries that he doesn't eat. Getting him to eat seems to have become an obsession for my mum, so we loiter endlessly in the dog food section looking for new possibilities to tempt him to eat. Lucy eats reasonably well (as long as no one looks at her) and she is the easiest of the three dogs to shop for. It probably only takes about 15 minutes for my mum to consider every option and then decide to buy her regular brand of dog food! 

The other member of the household is Fred the tortoise who has been part of the family since my childhood. He is probably the most pampered tortoise in the county and there are times when I envy his lifestyle! In October he retires to his winter quarters and sleeps until the spring when the days become warmer again. His summer quarters, an open fronted hutch in a large pen has to be moved around the lawn so that he can enjoy fresh grass and plenty of dandelions (his favourite). Throughout the spring and summer he munches his way through a monumental amount of salad and such like. Mum insists on having a bird net over the pen to stop them from stealing his food and every time it rains my mum covers his run with a tarpaulin so that he will not get wet, then when the sun comes out she adjusts the tarpaulin so that he has plenty of shade. So as you can see one small tortoise manages to dominate the daily routine of the household!

A couple of years ago we made the mistake of buying a multi hanger bird feeder for my stepfather so that he could enjoy watching the birds through the window. It was a success, in fact it was too successful, feeding the birds seems to dominate their lives! They get through unbelievable quantities of seed, sunflower seeds, fat balls and assorted pellets and every couple of weeks I'm dispatched to the pet superstore to buy a trolley load of supplies for the birds! Judging by the amount of food they eat it is a wonder that any of the local birds can still fly! 

I wouldn't be without my pets, but they are not quite as pampered as my mums. If the people who believe in reincarnation are proved right I hope that I will come back as a tortoise because Fred seems to have a happy and untroubled life!

'The Norfolk landscape sends a shiver through my soul....' - Raffaella Barker

Tuesday 6th August

The picture shows the view from our back gate this morning. It is such a lovely day that I would have been happy just to wander on the beach or sit in the garden. However we had a couple of errands to do so we decided to sneak another trip to the Beach Cafe as well. I love it there, it was absolutely packed today but the food was excellent and the service was exceptional. 

As we ate our lunch I watched the people on the beach, the children with buckets and beach toys playing in the pools left by the tide and paddling in the sea and the parents keeping a protective eye on their little ones. It took me back to when my children were little, they loved the beach and they loved to play in the pools left behind by the tide. In one way it seems as if I have blinked and they are all grown up, but at the same time it feels as if it was a lifetime ago because so much has happened in our lives since then.

We went to Stalham for the errands I mentioned and on our way back to the car we found a fantastic little shop called Truly Local. If you are ever in Stalham it is well worth a visit. All the produce is sourced from a 35 mile radius of Stalham and the quality is obvious. We had a bit of a spending spree, we bought some beautiful strawberries, cream, strawberry jam, marmalade with whiskey (for Robbie), tomato focaccia, tomatoes (for me), goat burgers (for Robbie) and a couple of local beers Grain Brewery's Blonde Ash and Hare of the Dog by the Why Not Brewery (also for Robbie!). He wanted to buy some squirrel meat too (apparently it is very popular) but we are on holiday and I really don't want to mess around making a casserole. We were told that it tastes like rabbit and you cook it in much the same way. I don't eat rabbit and I really don't have a burning desire to try squirrel, but Robbie seems to have other ideas! We will certainly go back to Truly Local while we are in Norfolk, I wish we had a shop like this at home.

Worry often gives a small thing a big shadow - Swedish Proverb

Today was very frustrating, one of those days when everything seems more difficult than it should be. I had a hospital appointment this afternoon, I'd been looking forward to it and dreading it at the same time. I badly needed some answers but I wasn't sure that I was going to like what I heard, so I felt very anxious.

Robbie came with me and since parking at the hospital is challenging at the best of times, I decided to park in a nearby car park and walk the short distance to the hospital. We still have snow but as the hospital is very close to the town centre I was fairly sure that the pavements would be gritted - they weren't! We slipped and slid towards the hospital very slowly indeed, but we made it without any serious problems. The road and pavement leading to the hospital main entrance were treacherous, it beggars belief that the local authority take no responsibility for making sure that roads and paths leading to hospitals, schools and the like are cleared and made safe. Having negotiated the icy pavements I had to pass a huddle of smokers who blocked the pavement just outside the hospital grounds. I was on my way to the chest clinic and the last thing that I needed was their second hand smoke!

I didn't really get the answers I wanted, just lots more questions, more medication. To be fair he did take my problem seriously and he understood how debilitating this cough is, it makes every aspect of my life so much more difficult. He requested lots of tests including an MRI scan, blood tests (I think they took a whole arm full of blood!) and various breathing tests. I have to see the consultant again in 2 months, I really hope the increased medication will help because the thought of putting up with this for another two months makes me feel like giving up. 

We had to go to a different part of the hospital to get my blood tests don so we walked back towards town a different way, but the paths were just as bad and our progress was slow. We walked through St Giles churchyard, it is beautiful at any time of year but the snow against the white snow-laden skies made it look magical, for some reason it made me think of Narnia. I have happy memories of walking through the churchyard with my aunt when I was a child and it looked so beautiful today that I asked Robbie to take some photos for me with his new phone.

Robbie took me to the Cordwainer for something to eat because I had been too anxious to eat much at lunchtime. He likes Wetherspoons food but it didn't really 'float my boat' and it was so dark in there, I like to see what I am eating. It is scary, but I have to admit that I sound more like my grandma every day!
   

The greatest gift is our own eyes, sense of smell, and abilities to deduce - Patricia Cornwell

I was dreading going home after our holiday, because I knew the house would be a mess, it was, but it was not as bad as it was last year. We had a nice surprise because my daughter had painted the bathroom and it looks very nice. When we opened the front door we were met by a very unpleasant smell and my first hour or so at home was taken up with trying to track it down. It wasn't animal related and it wasn't the bin, amazingly the bin bag in the kitchen was almost empty. I tracked the pong to the kitchen but I couldn't identify it, I checked for rotting vegetables, but there were none, I had a good sniff inside the fridge but the smell wasn't coming from there. 

In the end I had to leave it and get on with tidying the kitchen and doing the laundry. Then Robbie made me a cup of tea and I sat down in the lounge to drink it. I could smell an over-ripe banana in the fruit bowl and I took it out to the food recycling caddy and as I lifted the lid, the pong was revealed in all it's glory. The contents of the caddy which had morphed into a green hairy mass, had been there since before our holiday! When I had escorted the stinking mass to the outside food bin and disinfected the food caddy, the inquest began. My son was adamant that it was not on his list - a typically aspie response! My older daughter who has a poor sense of smell claimed not to have noticed it and her sister announced that she doesn't have anything to do with food recycling because it is gross. So, the combined intellect of two university graduates and an A Level student was not sufficient to cope with the 'complexities' of  emptying the food caddy. Next year I will leave the cat in charge!

A Good Drying Day

When I woke up on Thursday morning I was surprised to find that it was already a beautiful sunny day, so I decided to strike while the iron was hot and get some washing out - it was dry in a couple of hours! To be honest I was feeling a bit anxious because today was A level results day and my son had to go and pick up his AS Level exam results. It seemed to take forever but eventually the phone rang and his sister informed me that he had got good grades. My son then came on the phone, for just long enough for me to congratulate him, then he handed me back to his sister, I don't think he has any idea how how much I worry about him at times!

I didn't really want to go anywhere today the garden and the beach are all we need and the weather is perfect, but the lure of the beach cafe drew us to Mundesley for a late lunch. The food was excellent and better still they have mastered the art of making a good cup of tea, in fact their pot of tea for one provided two full cups of tea and the milk jug contained plenty of milk. The beach was busy but the tide was out so there was plenty of room for everyone. I was tempted to go for a stroll on the beach at Mundesley, but in the end we decided to head back to our beach at Walcott instead. Robbie doesn't paddle, but I love it so we strolled along the beach with me splashing about in the shallows and him keeping a safe distance. This year I asserted my independence and bought a pair of Crocs, much to the disgust of my daughters. For years they have told me that it would be too embarrassing for words if I wore Crocs, but I decided that they will just have to come to terms with the embarrassment because I needed some comfortable and practical holiday footwear. They are the most comfortable shoes i have ever worn, so I think I will wear them at home too!!

“Only when the tide goes out do you discover who's been swimming naked” - Warren Buffet

I am one of those people who doesn't like hot or strong tasting food, but my son a more adventurous attitude to food. He enjoys hot and spicy tastes and one of his favourite treats is hot salsa dip. When I went shopping a couple of days ago I bought him some salsa dip because it was on offer. I was I a bit of a rush when I got home and I absent-mindedly packed it into the fridge with the chilled items. The fridge was rather full so I just tucked items in whatever spaces I could find because I knew the fridge fairy (Robbie) would rearrange it anyway - he always does!

We have a fridge freezer with the freezer at the bottom and the fridge above and I find it hard to reach  the top shelves of the fridge. I don't know why I put the salsa dip in front of the milk on the top shelf, but it certainly wasn't intended to be a booby trap. The salsa had escaped Robbie's attention on the day of purchase, but it made it's presence felt the following morning. It is Robbies habit to wander downstairs wearing 'not a lot' to make a coffee (tea for me) and to feed the cats. He opened the fridge and reached up to get a new bottle of milk and the glass jar of dip fell from a great height, smashed and splattered everywhere. Thankfully 'everywhere' did not include that sensitive spot that would probably have required a trip to casualty. However it did involve a massive clean up operation which disrupted his morning routine - I was not popular! 

Don't judge each day by the harvest you reap, but by the seeds you plant - Robert Louis Stevenson

I love Saturdays, there is nothing better than the luxury of time. Going to bed on a Friday evening knowing that you don't have to set the alarm clock. Then waking up on a Saturday morning knowing that you can lay there and listen to the radio if you want to, or you can take a long lazy bath without anyone telling you to hurry up. Perhaps most important of all from my point of view is having time to enjoy a cup of tea without the need to rush, in fact I can enjoy two cups of tea if the mood takes me!


It was such a relief to have a more or less dry day on Saturday, it gave us a chance to consider the garden. I use the word consider rather than a more active word because I rendered myself incapable of anything more active. Robbie whispered the magic words into my ear and I gave in to temptation. The words in question were 'full English' - Robbie's speciality. I couldn't resist, it was more brunch than breakfast by the time we got around to eating and by then I was hungry. I ate too much because it was too nice to leave and after that I felt so full that I thought I would never be able to move again. So we spent time planning our next moves in the rather than actually doing the deed.  

We decided that the back fence needed urgent attention. I wanted something to grow up the fence that would look more attractive than the fence and would deter anyone who may be tempted to climb the fence. So we went out to choose some plants to grow along the fence. Robbie spotted a very pretty fuchsia, which while beautiful was not what I had in mind at all. We settled on Pyracantha it has several things to recommend it, it will add some colour to the garden in winter and if anyone tries to climb over that they will probably end up on hospital, it has thorns as long as spears! We bought some more potting compost too. We need to replace the soil in the tubs in the front garden, they have been washed out and waterlogged for so long that we need a fresh start. I think I will leave that job for a little while until I am certain that it has stopped raining.

What goes on in his head?

It was 8.30am on Saturday morning and I was tired of waiting for Robbie to wake up, so I decided to wake him up. He seemed oblivious of the first two or three prods, then suddenly he turned over and said "That's a surprise, there were no announcements". I asked what he was talking about and he said that he dreamt that Google had a new operating platform and he was trying to work it out. Not for the first time it left me wondering what goes on in that man's head. I have never knowingly had a dream about Google, in fact I haven't given it a passing thought. What sort of person  dreams about Google for heaven sake!!


We had to go shopping for a gift for Robbie's new nephew. I was tempted by the usual sort of baby designs but Robbie was attracted to the more colourful designs. We couldn't agree, but then Robbie spotted a blue all in one with a Thomas the Tank Engine design and his mind was made up, apparently you are never too young for trains!! I know when I'm defeated, but I made sure that we found a cute cuddly elephant for the baby too.


Robbie spent most of the day planning and re planning the best route to south Staffordshire. I wondered why it was proving so hard to plan a train journey, I know it was a bank holiday weekend, but surely it shouldn't be that difficult. Eventually all became clear; he could take a more direct route and have time to eat with me before he left, but if he took the more contorted route via Walsall he could do a bit of bus spotting as well! If time had been on his side I think the buses would have won, but in the end he chose to spend a little longer with me so that we could go and eat.


I dropped Robbie off at the station in good time for his train and I drove off to do some shopping and to enjoy a few hours of peace and quiet. The peace and quiet didn't last long, when I got home my son had taken control of the television and I had to endure his viewing choices all evening. Well I didn't have to, but it would have been unkind to object when there was nothing that I wanted to watch. I occupied myself with family history research on the internet and before long I had 'zoned out' the junk on television. Meanwhile Robbie was at a family party to celebrate the wedding of his nephew (a different nephew, not the newborn one!!) according to his texts he was having a great time, but he had to admit that he is getting old - the music was too loud!! Maybe it wasn't such a hardship to put up with junk television after all, at least I could control the volume! 

Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm - Winston Churchill

It is time to admit that I am a failure, I know that because Robbie told me so loud and clear. I picked him up when I finished work yesterday evening so it was passed 9pm when we got home. The cats were not impressed, they are very good at telling the time (thanks to Robbie's efforts) and they knew that their dinner was late. The loudest complaints were coming from Shadow the guinea pig. I am not aware that Robbie has been actively teaching Shadow to tell the time, perhaps guinea pigs have an innate sense of time or perhaps she just loves to eat whatever the time.


Robbie and the cats disappeared into the kitchen; it was hard to work out if he was feeding them or trying to extend their vocabulary! A little later Robbie emerged from the kitchen holding a plastic bag with a few flecks of green in it. The clues were there, the expression, the hand on the hip, not to mention the expletives from the kitchen - he was not a happy chap. The plastic bag had once contained curly kale, but except for tiny traces of green it was now empty. He waved the bag at me and said "now what am I going to do?". It took me a moment to compose my features because there was something vaguely ridiculous about Robbie who is not noted for his love of 'greens' getting so upset about a deficiency in the curly kale department. Before I could say anything he said "what am I going to say to the guinea pig". I took a deep breath and said that we had other greens, carrots and apples as well as her dried food and hay, so it was unlikely that she would starve. Unbelievably he walked over to the guinea pig to show her the empty bag and to apologise on my behalf for running out of curly kale. I don't think she took too much notice, she was too busy tucking into an apple and her dried food. 


As soon as I finished work today I dashed to the supermarket and we now have an ample supply of curly kale. After all I don't want the guinea pig to think that I'm a failure!

Too Many Cooks ................

Robbie has many talents, but don't worry I am not going to tell you about all of them! He is surprisingly useful in the kitchen and on a good day we can work well together. The difficulty is that I think of it as my kitchen while he acts as if it is his. To be fair it is not the best designed kitchen in the world and we could do with a lot more storage space, but for the time being we have to work with what we have - and that is where the problem arises. 


I have written before about him being a control freak when it comes to food shopping, and about the way he controls the fridge. It can be challenging, but most of the time I tend to let him get on with it, he may be totally rigid about the everything having to be the correct size and in exactly the right place, but at least he makes an effort. There are times when he goes a bit too far, such as his phase of leaving post-it notes in the fridge, thankfully that is a thing of the past but we still have bitter disputes about sell by dates. I don't expect him to eat anything that has past its use by date, but I am not as fussy especially with things like horseradish sauce. I am the only one in the house that likes it, so how dare he throw it away without asking me! He was in big trouble when he did that - but he will not do it again!!

Now we have a new problem - recycling. We recycle paper, plastic, metal and glass without any problems, but now our local council collects food waste too. We have an indoor caddy for food scraps and an outdoor food bin. We don't have much food waste, mostly it is used tea bags, egg shells, a few crusts and an occasional potato that has passed it's prime. Logically I want the food caddy on the work top near the kettle so that it is easy to put tea bags straight into the caddy. However Robbie takes a different view, he doesn't like it there and he would rather have it on the opposite worktop near the cooker. So for several weeks it has been a case of 'hunt the caddy' - he moves it and I move it back again. As if that is not irritating enough, on Monday morning it had vanished completely. I rang the 'king of the kitchen' and he admitted that he had hidden it in the cupboard under the crisps to hide it from the cat. It seemed like lame excuse, Dave the cat is the 'Robbie' of the cat world, they share a passion for food of all kinds, but even Dave would turn his nose up at egg shells! The caddy has stayed in 'my place' for two days now, so we will see what happens over the weekend. 

The man who reads nothing at all is better educated than the man who reads nothing but newspapers - Thomas Jefferson

There are many things that I love about Robbie, but his choice of newspaper is is not one of them. I detest the thing I resent the waste of paper and I resent the waste of money, I would rather he spent it on a railway magazine, even if he spent it on  Lego or any of his other many and varied obsessions it wouldn't seem so pointless. I have managed to change or modify many things about Robbie over the years, but he remains stubbornly attached to his limp lefty newspaper, so I do my best to ignore it.

Yesterday evening we settled down in the lounge, me with my laptop and Robbie across the room with his newspaper. I was lost in my own little world writing the blog when I glanced up to see Robbie holding his phone out to the cat, and more worrying still the cat was looking at it as if he was reading a text! I asked Robbie what he was doing and with a totally serious expression he said that he was showing the cat the time to prove that he had to wait another hour until feeding time. 

I shook my head in disbelief and settled back to writing the blog. A little later completely out of the blue Robbie asked "How much does mum pay for David's socks these days". It seemed such an odd question that I had to ask him to repeat it in case I hadn't heard him properly. I told Robbie that I have never given a passing thought to the price of my step father's socks - but thanks to Robbie I have now! Once he get's started on a subject there is no stopping him and I heard all about the advantages of loose top socks, a very good deal he had spotted; the price, the colour, it went on an on until I begged him to stop.

Finally he was quiet and I went back to what I was doing. Peace reigned for a little while, then Robbie's voice rang out asking "Have you noticed that you don't often see radishes in the supermarket these days?" I thought about it for a minute and decided to try my luck with a one word answer - no! It was worth a try, but it just encouraged him to provide more radish related information. I listened for a while but I really couldn't summon up much interest in radishes. I asked if he had ever eaten a radish and he informed me that he hadn't. I informed him that he hadn't missed much! I told him that if he was that interested I would buy him some radishes, but he quickly declined and told me that it just was something he had been reading about. 

So now yo know why I dislike that dratted newspaper, it puts ridiculous ideas in his head!

Finding the Magic of Christmas

I often think that we have got it all wrong when it comes to Christmas we get so tied up with buying presents and   Christmas food becomes an ordeal from start to finish - shopping for it, to storing it, cooking it and digesting it! Despite all my good intentions Christmas crept up on me and I was as disorganised as ever. I had been stashing presents away for months, just little things for Robbie, he is a big kid when it comes to Christmas and it makes me so happy to watch him opening his presents. I had been reasonably organised about presents for other family members, our children provide lists now, so that's easy and buying for my young niece and nephews is a pleasure. Finding the money is a bit more of a challenge, but that is the same for everyone. 


The bits of Christmas that I find challenging include getting the Christmas tree and decorations out of the loft, putting the tree up - and tidying up the mess afterwards! Arguing about where best to put the tree and acting as referee in the annual argument about whose turn it is to have their angel on top of the tree this year. The food shopping is probably the biggest headache, affording it, making sure that we have enough food while trying not to buy so much that it will be wasted. It is just such an effort tackling the supermarket, unloading the shopping and packing it into the fridge and freezer. Then I have to cope with Robbie huffing and puffing because the fridge is not packed correctly and things are in the wrong place in the freezer. Last but not least is wrapping, I quite like wrapping up presents but suddenly everything has to be wrapped at once and however well prepared I think I am, I find that someone has 'borrowed' the scissors, or the sellotape - or both!


This year was like every other year,  by Christmas morning I was exhausted and it was a real struggle to get up and join in the fun of present opening, but the excitement of gift giving works it's magic and memories of other Christmas mornings fill my mind, distant memories of my own childhood when Santa always left shiny new coins at the bottom of my stocking. Then there are the special Christmas memories of my own children when they were little. One daughter asked Santa to bring her a sheep - that was one Christmas wish that didn't come true. There was the time when I was filming both daughters singing Christmas carols for their grandma and the little one (age 4) kept stopping to tell her older sister off for singing her part, it was so funny. My favourite memory of my son at Christmas was when he was a shepherd in the nativity play, he was 3 or 4 at the time and he walked up to Mary and Joseph swinging his knitted lamb around by by it's tail!


Like snowflakes, my Christmas memories gather and dance - each beautiful, unique and too soon gone. ~Deborah Whipp

In the end the food and the presents don't matter so much, it is being together that counts, family time taking pleasure in the special people around us. Christmas may be hard work but this year just as every other year, sharing the day with all the people I love made it all worthwhile.

Living in the Past

It is half term, it seems as if they only went back to school a couple of weeks ago, but I have my son's company for the week. He (the one who likes to remain nameless) graciously agreed to come to the supermarket with me in return for a lift into town afterwards. According to him we had no food in the house and he was starving, but in reality the fridge, freezer and cupboards were well stocked; he just had a yearning for junk food and cereal. Typical!


As we drove out of the supermarket I wondered aloud if the woman at the traffic lights seriously thought that off white, skin tight almost see through leggings with a short top was a good look. I answered myself with the thought that someone should buy her a mirror for Christmas!  The nameless one in the passenger seat laughed out loud, he said "Mum, you make me laugh you are always living in the past" He went on to tell me that I didn't understand fashion, that may be true but I am fairly sure the world is not ready for sights like that!


In a way he is right, I don't live in the past but I carry it with me. It only takes a word or a look, a sound or a smell to transport me back to the people and places of my past. Sometimes a smile or a guilty look from my son reminds me so much of his dad. The smell from the brewery takes me back to my earliest years when I used to go with my aunt to deliver the church magazine in the streets that are now long gone. The sight of magnolia blossom brings back memories of my college rooms with the beautiful magnolia tree near my window. 

I came across this photo recently, I remember going to the Odeon to see the Aristocats, it was a birthday treat for one of my best friends. Looking at the Ladybird shop next door reminded me how much I disliked shopping for clothes with my mum when I was little. She has always loved fashion, but even when I was tiny I detested frills and fuss. It was a battle of wills, my mum got me to try on countless outfits and I objected to every single one. Sometimes I got my own way, but more often my mum dressed me in the clothes she liked. Among the horrors that still haunt me was the seriously unflattering ruched swimming costume and a bright red wet look raincoat that made terrible noises every time I moved. The worst by far were the orange hot pants, unlike my mum I have never been a hot pants type of person! So maybe my son is right I don't understand fashion, but I do understand that there are some sights that the world will never be ready for!!

'The Norfolk landscape sends a shiver through my soul....' - Raffaella Barker

Our holiday in Norfolk had been planned long before our recent woes and despite the huge black cloud of worry hanging over us we decided to go and make the most of the peace and freedom that we always find in Norfolk. These things never work out as planned and before we could pack and get ready for our holiday we had to address the pressing issues that were crowding into our week. Robbie had important deadlines to meet at work, but he also needed to see the GP urgently, and just to confuse matters further he had to take time out of a very busy week to deal with three totally intelligible letters sent by CMEC/CSA which no one dealing with his case could explain. They couldn’t even tell who had sent the letters or why, I in these days of austerity I can’t help wondering why a government agency would send out three different letters to the same person on the same day in three different envelopes and then waste hours of staff time responding to frantic phone calls from intelligent people who are totally baffled by the correspondence. What I wonder has happened to plain English and what on earth has happened to customer service?



Robbie arrived home from work at 11pm on Friday evening; I was tired, frustrated and still packing. Robbie was so tired that he was like a zombie and so challenging that if I hadn’t sent him upstairs to sort his clothes out I might have harmed him! It was heading towards 3am when I went to bed and Robbie was even later because he was dealing with final bits and bobs of work that had to be done before we could go on holiday. I knew that would fall asleep but I was too tired to wait for him, in the past Meg would have woken him up and sent him to bed when she got sick of his snoring, but now he had a stark choice, find his own way to bed or stay put.


The alarm woke us at 6am and ‘sleeping beauty’ reluctantly plodded off to make a cup of tea. Within half an hour I was up, washed, dressed and packing the car. I wanted to be on the road by 8am, but Robbie trotted around in a state of undress and showed a marked reluctance to get himself organised. He still had to finish off some bits and bobs at work and this was delayed further by computer problems. The clock ticked on, 8 o’clock came and went and by 10 o’clock a near naked Robbie was still messing around with work matters and I was finding it increasingly difficult to keep my temper. I finally chased him off to get ready and at 10.50am I went to sit in the car to wait for him, at least I could listen to the radio while I waited. At 11.30am he came out to announce that he was on his way before scuttling back in to do a few last minute jobs. At 12.OO I was parked outside Marks and Spencer’s waiting for Robbie to buy himself a coffee and a breakfast baguette. Then at long last we were on our way.


Considering the late start we had a reasonable journey and made good time. Before we had even left Northampton Robbie did his usual trick of squealing with delight at something that he had seen from the car. This time it was not a train, it was two traction engines in the car park of the rugby club, he was very disappointed that I refused to stop for him to take a closer look. One day he will cause an accident by shouting out like that. I got my own back on him later when I told him that I had caught him out in a bit of mischief (yet again), it is one of the few occasions that I can recall Robbie being completely speechless. He should know by now that I don’t miss much!


We arrived at about 3pm and began the exhausting process of unpacking and putting everything away. I was exhausted and all I really wanted to do was to make the bed and crawl into it, but suddenly we were thrown into panic mode – it seems I had forgotten to pack the coffee! Robbie was very good, he managed not to stamp his feet, but the arms were folded and the bottom lip was sticking out as if he was a sulky toddler. So, before the unpacking was completed we had to get back into the car and head for Tesco in order to find the correct brand of coffee. By then I was far too tired to contemplate cooking, in fact I wasn’t even sure I was awake enough to eat anything, but Robbie’s rumbling tummy led us to the fish and chip shop. I found that I was hungry after all and I managed to clear my plate before sleep finally caught up with me.

Death By Misadventure - Well Almost!

Dave had a near death experience last night and it was partly my fault. My favourite meal is liver and bacon, but I always pick the bits of onion out of the gravy, the onion needs to be there to flavour the gravy but there is no way that I want to eat that slimy stuff so I pick it out. I usually put the onion bits in a little plastic bag but yesterday there was an empty crisp packet at the top of the bin so I scooped the gravy covered onion into that folded it over a few times and put it in the bin. I thought no more about it and in due course I went To bed. The problem is that a when it comes to food Dave is a chap who just can't say no (a bit like Robbie really!) and old habits are hard to break, he was a stray for a long time and he still has a compulsion to rummage through the bins. It seems Dave went rummaging in the bin, found the crisp packet and in an attempt to get the bits of onion and gravy he got the crisp packet stuck on his head. Robbie came home very late from a rail tour and he found Dave sprawled on the floor in the hall almost unconscious with the crisp packet on his head. At first Robbie thought he was dead but when he removed the crisp packet and stroked him for a little while Dave revived and by the time I went down to feed him in the he was his old self again. I would have been devastated if anything had happened to him, I love that cat so much.

Shopping for the Cat

Robbie has his funny little ways. I have written before about him talking to the animals and even attempting to teach the cats to tell the time, but it is becoming silly now. He has taken the Dr Doolittle thing one step further, he now claims to speak for the cats! He really doesn't need to, both cats are quite capable of making their feelings very clear. When Robbie is cross with Oreo he hides under the bath (the cat not Robbie, Robbie wouldn't fit under the bath!) but Dave stands his ground and swears back and if Robbie points at him Dave raises his paw to remind Robbie that what he lacks in teeth he makes up for in claws! Dave is my cat and as far as he is concerned Robbie should know his place. He hates Robbie to sit next to me or to hug me and if Robbie is brave enough to try Dave pushes his way between us and sits there defiantly until Robbie moves away. I accept that Dave can communicate eloquently with Robbie and I understand they both have more than a passing interest in food, but this is going too far. According to Robbie, Dave prefers me to buy his cat food from Tesco (not my usual supermarket), he would prefer it to be in a foil tray rather than in a pouch and he would like more of the fish flavours and less of the meat flavours. Apparently his lack of teeth makes our usual brand of cat food a bit of an effort for him. Really? I find that hard to believe, this is the cat who can steal and eat a whole sausage, he likes nothing better than climbing into the bin to forage for treats and when we bring the shopping home he will rip open anything that takes his fancy if we take our eyes off him for a second. I suspect Dave's sudden interest in supermarket shopping has more to do with Robbie's preferences than the cat's! 

Loud and Impossible to Ignore

On Friday evening I collected my daughter from university, she was finally home after a trip to USA. She is a Geography student and the trip to SW USA was an important part of her course. Her flight home had been delayed by five hours so I expected her to be tired and jet lagged, she wasn't, she was very talkative. 


She had seen some amazing places but for the first hour or so all she could talk about was how much she disliked the food. This surprised me as I had assumed that they would have the same sort of food as we do in UK, but apparently that is not the case. She was appalled that they have doughnuts for breakfast, she said that everything was far too sweet and the portion sizes were ridiculously large. She said that everywhere seemed to smell of peanut butter and it made her feel ill, I think she may have been exaggerating because I can't imaginine anyone wanting to eat peanut butter on a regular basis. I think she may have seen peanut butter here but we don't have it at home. I quite like it but she doesn't like nuts so I am not surprised that she was put off by the smell. I asked if they still have Root Beer in USA, back in dim distant past they used to have root beer at Mc Donalds and I loved it. As far as I was concerned it was the only nice thing at Mc Donalds, but it was probably very bad for me - it seems that everything that I like is bad for me! She didn't know anything about Root Beer, but she told me that Mountain Dew is different in USA, it is high caffeine here but apparently they can't put as many additives in it here as they do in USA.  


My daughter said that fuel was really cheap (I wish it was here) but she went on to say that apples were very expensive. I am not sure why apples and fuel popped up in the same sentence, but who knows what goes on in the brain of a 19 year old! I can't think why apples would be expensive but that is what she said. Anyway I must stop obsessing about food, but in the interest of fairness I should point out that within a couple of days she was longing for some of the things she had eaten in USA. Young people are so fickle!

Being a typical young woman she found time for a bit of a spending spree. She bought herself some lovely clothes and a new ipod, and knowing Robbie's passion for PJs (or as he says 'lounge-wear') she bought him a pair of PJ bottoms, he loves them because they are loud and hard to ignore - just like him. They have M&Ms in various colours all over them, to say they are brightly coloured is an understatement - they are scarily loud. I didn't think the blog was ready for another picture of Robbie in his PJs but you can see the pattern in this picture. I think Robbie was rather touched that she knows him well enough to make such a perfect choice.

Dr Dolittle

I am used to Robbie having long conversations with the cats and he invests a lot of effort into teaching them to tell the time. On Friday evening I witnessed a conversation between Robbie and Dave the cat. Dave had been fussing around asking to be fed and Robbie pointed up at the kitchen clock and said "when the big hand is on twelve it will be feeding time". Dave is very good communicator, his expression and his body language was more eloquent than any hand signal. He stalked off into the lounge and settled down by the fire, he preferred to examine his nether regions than to have yet another lecture on telling the time from Robbie.

The big hand finally got to 12 and true to his word Robbie fed the animals. Afterwards Dave had the devil in him and he did a couple of things to annoy Robbie, he tried to steal Robbie's food and then he sat on some newly folded laundry. When it comes to food Robbie is not good at sharing, dressed only in his underwear he pursued Dave around the lounge and the kitchen flapping a tea towel at him and telling him that he doesn't steal Dave's food and he doesn't intend to share his with Dave! Robbie chased Dave up the stairs and I heard a series of expletives emanating from the bathroom. Obviously Robbie had given up on teaching him to tell the time and was now giving him a lesson in colloquial English! Robbie announced that Dave had hidden behind the bath (I didn't really blame him) but suddenly Robbie thundered down the stairs waving an aerosol can. Dave darted into the lounge in search of protection and I told Robbie to put the can down and behave himself. I am used to acting as referee in spats between Sam and Robbie (at times it is like having two teenagers), but having a row with a cat is a step too far!

Clever Cats

Robbie is not one to shy away from a challenge, but sometimes I think he is a slow learner. Surely he should know by now that it is impossible to train a cat - but it doesn't stop him trying! Each time the clocks change he begins a process with the cats to reset their body clock. Train planning spills over into all aspects of Robbie's daily life including feeding the cat's. they have their booked slot and he nothing will make him deviate from it. Each day Robbie talks to the cats and explains how much longer they have to wait until their designated meal time (using the 24 hour clock of course!). Oreo is nice but dim and he doesn't take much notice of Robbie, but George humours him by looking vaguely interested. He is older and wiser than Oreo, he can tell the time, and he can manipulate Robbie. If Robbie makes him wait for his food, he gives him the run around, he raids the bin, scratches the door and does countless other things to get his attention. Robbie hasn't quite made the connection yet, a well fed cat is a well behaved cat! Eventually Robbie will realise that cats have a more elastic concept of time - rather like Network Rail!

Cold Feet

Robbie went back to work on Friday, but he was still not back to normal (not that he could ever be described as normal) he was still feeling cold and still off his food. In fact he is still finding it hard to eat, it is almost unheard of for Robbie to leave food on his plate, but this weekend his eyes have been bigger than his belly! It seems to be taking a long time for him to get his energy and appitite back. The oddest thing is that he has gone off coffee, he just can't face it. He has also been suffering from very cold extremities, so we have had to come up with some unusual solutions to keep his feet warm, it is harder than you think because one of his feet is four sizes bigger than the other. I have been forbidden to discuss the solutions we tried, but it involved pink polka dots!