The subject of death and funerals has been much on our minds recently and it is hardly surprising that thoughts of my first husband's last days have been very much to the fore. Sam was only eight when his dad died, so for him even more than the rest of us, grief has been a gradual process as he has grown in maturity and understanding. Eric pops up in conversation all the time, but sometimes Sam needs more specific information about his illness. Yesterday Sam and I were chatting about funerals and he told me that he remembered some parts of his dad's funeral vividly. I asked him if he remembered choosing the music for the funeral, he didn't, but when I told him about it he laughed out loud. Memories are precious, even the sad ones, they bring the people we have lost a little closer and sometimes when you least expect it you find yourself smiling. Here is an extract from my diary, it will explain why we had to laugh about the choice of music for the funeral.
Emily chose the music for the end of the church service, Eva Cassidy
was one of Eric's favourites and we used to play that CD in the car
all the time. Sam and Laura had taken responsibility for choosing the music for the crematorium. It was a difficult choice because Eric and I
didn't share the same taste in music. Eric liked Cliff Richard while
I quite definitely didn't! We both liked Eva Cassidy and the whole
family liked the BeeGees, Eric used to 'sing' along in the car and he was
surprisingly good at the high bits. They chose one of the songs
Eric liked best, I was horrified when they announced that they had
chosen 'staying alive' !! I had visions of the curtain closing as
that song rang out, Eric would have found it hilariously funny, but
it just wouldn't do! In the end Laura was put in charge of the
seating arrangements in the cars and together we chose Somewhere Over
the Rainbow by Eva Cassidy for the crematorium.
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