Slow Learner

Robbie is having trouble with his knees - no it is not another post about his legs misbehaving, this time the cause is crystal clear - groveling! In the past I have called him a slow learner, I was being generous his behaviour this week suggests rank stupidity. He waited until Thursday morning to ask if he could 'play trains' at the weekend. I am not at my best before 6am so it was stupid to ask me when I was still half asleep. To add insult to injury he then tells me that it will only be a day and I will hardly notice that he isn't there. A little more digging illicited the information that he would leave for work on Friday morning and arrive home late morning on Sunday - since when does Friday to Sunday equal one day? Last night he sat there with a face like a pig's bottom (not that I am over familiar with the nether regions of pigs) and a little black cloud of doom hanging over him. I was so angry with him, this is our last weekend before going on holiday, there is loads of work to do getting things ready and I don't see why I should do all the hard work while he is out having fun. It didn't help that he had his headphones in and spent the evening doing 'train stuff' on the computer. This morning he tried the 'poor pathetic me act' and it made me feel like breaking something - his neck probably! I decided to let him go for his own safety and because I will have a nicer weekend without him, but he needs to watch out, he is going to be a very busy boy next week!!

Miracles Do Happen!

I have tried everything, threats, encouragement, punishment and even bribery! Bribery works best, but even then making progress is painfully slow. No, I am not talking about trying to achieve world peace or anything like that - I am referring to the problem of getting a 14 year old to tidy his bedroom! After weeks of nagging Sam has finally rediscovered the carpet in his bedroom and by Friday it should be sorted out to my satisfaction. It feels like a miracle - maybe I could get Robbie to sort out his stuff next!

Laura got back from holiday on Monday, she had been to Greece and she looks very tanned and a bonus is that the sun light has eased her skin condition a bit. She had a really good time, but now she has to face reality and start earning some money ready for university. Why does time go so fast when you are on holiday and so slowly when you are doing things you don't like.

An Extra Leg?

I found out why Robbie has been so impossible recently, he is worried. He is having numbness and pain in part of his hand, until now the numbness has only been in his feet and legs. When he told me I thought it may be something like carpel tunnel syndrome, but the symptoms don't match that. He will not go to the doctors to find out what is causing it, so his imagination is on overtime. Why do men make everything so complicated?

I explained to Robbie that I was very tired and that when he wakes me up at night I can't get back to sleep. I even warned him that if he woke me up again he would need to run very far and very fast! By the time he came to bed at about 1am I was asleep, but he was talking loudly as he walked into the bedroom. This time he was accusing me of stealing his socks! At the weekend when I was sorting and folding the clean washing I paired up and delivered at least eight pairs of socks; so unless he has recently grown an extra leg he should have enough socks to last a week! I didn't argue with him, I was too tired. Thankfully I was so tired that I went back to sleep fairly quickly.

Giong Comando - A Scary Thought!

On Sunday night I went to bed at at about 12.20am and Robbie assured me that he wouldn't be far behind. It was the usual story, I stayed awake, he didn't come to bed and I fell asleep. Suddenly I was aware of him shouting, he was really angry and moaning that he had no clean pants for the morning. I told him that they were in the pile of folded laundry that I gave him earlier, and there was at least enough pairs of pants for a week. He argued and insisted that there were no pants and he would have to go without. I was equally sure that the pants were exactly where I said they were. It was well past 2pm and I begged Robbie to shut up, but he was warming to his theme and he intended to list the many ways that I was neglecting him. Nothing I could say or do would make him shut up, and I was so annoyed about being woken up that I was ready to harm him. There was no alternative, I got up and went to sit in the bathroom to listen to the radio for a bit. When I got back he was still awake and I made it clear that if he spoke to me again I would go and sleep downstairs. He didn't speak, but he 'breathed aggressively' until he fell asleep and started snoring. I was awake for ages, then when I had got to sleep again it was time to get up! All that fuss about missing knickers! In the morning I made him look again at the pile of clean folded laundry and there were the pants, exactly where I said they were. That man is impossible sometimes!

Lost For Words

It hasn't been the most wonderful weekend. Robbie has been struggling with a bad back and an uncooperative leg for a while and he found last week especially challenging. We planned to go shopping as soon as he got home on Friday, but I could tell as soon as he walked to the car that all was not well. He was not walking very well at all and as soon as he got into the car he complained about the pain in his leg. He then sat in the car and had a serious word with his foot telling it to behave itself - I was expecting the men in white coats to turn up at any minute! It is the sort of situation when whatever you say will prove to be the wrong thing. I could tell there was something on his mind and before long he told me that a casual remark by a colleague had really got to him. He hates to give in, and accept that he has a problem, but occasionally he has to take things a little more steadily. He still meets his deadlines, but sometimes he just needs to do it his way.

Shopping wasn't a joy Robbie insisted that we should still go but he was ready to fall out with his own shadow. He may not have had much control over his wayward leg, but he was going to make sure he controlled everything else. We nearly came to blows when we got to the checkout because it had to be done Robbie's way and he got really assertive about it. I left him to put the shopping in the car his way, but when I dared to put something in the fridge he declared war and ordered me out of the kitchen. When I went back a bit later to do some washing up he tried to take over and when I resisted he stood behind me telling me I was doing it all wrong!

It was no surprise when later in the evening we had an argument because he was being totally controlling and unreasonable. I look forward to the weekend all week but I don't know why because something or other always comes along to spoil it.

Memory Lane

When I was a child colour television was a new and exciting development and daytime television had yet to be invented. It sounds rather quaint now, but we knew what we wanted to watch and we turned the television on five minutes or so before to 'warm up' and when the program was over we turned the television off and got on with other things. When I was small sitting down to see Watch With Mother was an important part of my day and among my favourites was Mary Mungo and Midge, a cartoon series about the adventures of a girl, a dog and a very badly behaved mouse who lived at the top of a tower block. When I was a little older another cartoon series captured my imagination, Captain Pugwash was the cowardly and greedy leader of a band of pirates and their comical exploits always made me smile. John Ryan, the cartoonist who created Mary Mungo and Midge and Captain Pugwash died last Friday, his work brought a lot of pleasure to generations of children. Television may have become much more sophisticated since then, but somewhere along the way it has lost the simple magic of those long gone days of Watch With Mother.

Head in the Clouds

Robbie was very late home last night, so he met me from work to get a lift home. Guess what he talked about on the way home - trains! Apparently there are plans to electrify certain routes and Robbie has big reservations. He probably has good reason for his doubts, but I was tired, hungry and not in the mood to hear a detailed comparison of the merits of diesel against electric. I was just thinking that for once it would be nice to talk about anything but trains, when Robbie did one of his famous conversational U turns and began talking about clouds. He pointed upwards and said "look at that cloud formation". I was tempted to remind him that I was driving and it was fairly important to keep my eyes on the road, but as usual I couldn't get a word in. I thought it was nice to hear him talking about something that had no connection at all with trains, you could almost call it romantic (well, as close as Robbie gets anyway). Then he spoiled everything by telling me that there was a list of cloud names in that dreaded book of his, Shott's Original Miscellany. He started to list the various different types of cloud and I made a mental note to burn that book. I love books and I honestly don't think I could destroy any book, but in Robbie's hands that book becomes an offensive weapon!

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/road-and-rail-transport/5892821/Electrified-rail-network-the-benefits.html

Why Does He Do That?

This morning as I was sitting on the bed drinking my tea I watched Robbie getting dressed. It wasn't his body that I found so fascinating, it was the method. I have always known that he has the shower process organised and timed to the last second. Not only can he tell you what order the 'bits' have to be washed in, but he has also timed each action and he knows exactly how many squirts of shower gel are required, needless to say he also dries himself 'by numbers' too!

When he gets dressed the socks come first, he has a very special relationship with his socks, they are like an extension of his personality - loud and annoying! It is the next bit that fascinates me, why would anyone put their tie on before their shirt? I was still pondering that as he put his trousers on, and I reminded him to fasten his zip. He put things right but then he went on to explain that he would never go out with his zip undone because when he stands on the pavement next to the drive he always checks that 'all is secure'. It is true, I have told him off for doing it many times, and he always stands on exactly the same spot to do it. Why would anyone do that in public, when it could be checked in private before leaving the house!

You Don't Understand!

This a quote from Robbie this evening, to get the full effect you should know that he was waving his arms around and looking anguished as he said it. "You don't understand, they are mine, they mean everything to me and nobody should take them away from me". With all that drama you could be forgiven for thinking that he was auditioning for a part in Eastenders, but believe it or not he was talking about his lost socks!!

The Vanishing Trick

I wasn't too happy with Robbie on Sunday night. He was telling me all weekend that he was looking forward to getting home, and he promised me lots of attention. He spent the evening listening to train noises on YouTube, then when I told him that I was going to bed he said he would be there in a minute. He even came up to bring me a drink and to tell me that he just had to lock the front door and put the dog out before coming to bed, then he vanished. I waited and waited, but after an hour I gave up and went to sleep. He finally arrived over an hour and a half late and he got a very short answer when he tried to cuddle up to me. I didn't get a chance to discuss his vanishing act with him until this morning, We went through the usual ritual, first he denied it, then he said he was mistaken about the time, then finally he admitted it. He was doing something that he has to do in private, he doesn't like talking to me about it, but apparently it really did take him an hour and a half - he was packing his bag for work!!

Robbie was unwell this morning, he had 'the trots' and being Robbie I was treated to a detailed account of his troubles. He got ready for work as usual, but then he came into the lounge and announced that he felt dreadful and he had a really bad sore throat. I suggested that going to work wasn't the wisest move, even if it wasn't swine flu, he wouldn't be popular if he passed on his troubles to everyone else in the office. In the end he decided to work from home today. To be honest I am a bit worried about Swine Flu, I have been in contact with it, but I hope that Robbie just has a nice ordinary bug. I was OK this morning, but then I developed similar symptoms and I had to come home from work feeling very unwell.