Near Death Experience

Sam's laptop has had a nervous breakdown this evening, it had been asked to do too much, remember too much and store too much – I know exactly how it feels!! The computer just shut down and refused to respond to anyone. Sam was in the lounge sitting next to the computer looking totally distracted and touching the computer from time to time in a forlorn attempt to coax it back to life. Robbie took a different approach he swore at it menacingly until he finally got it to open in safe mode. It took forever but finally the disk clean up announced that there were 7,479993.00 temporary internet files to be deleted! Once that lot was gone the computer was a little more responsive. I had never seen so many programs installed on one computer! Robbie helped Sam to delete all the unnecessary programs, you could almost hear the computer sigh with relief! He still has a massive (and weirdly eclectic) collection of music, 4645 emails to be deleted, and other assorted junk to be tidied up and removed. When you think of it like that it sounds like the virtual version of his bedroom!!

Cardboard Boxes

On Sunday we drove to Norton Canes to see Robbie's dad. I hate that journey, it is so boring and it seems to take forever, but it was important to go because his dad is moving in a few weeks and he had a few boxes of 'stuff' that he wanted Robbie to have. The last thing we need is any more 'stuff' but Robbie's dad was clear that if Robbie didn't want it it was going to the tip. I realiseed long ago that with Robbie it is a case of 'love me love my clutter' and I have to admit that my own life is far from clutter free, Perhaps that is just as well, I understood that the boxes at his dad's house just looked like boxes of junk in reality they were filled with memories and momentos from his childhood, his mum's china, his childhood birthday cards, photos and assorted bits and bobs that have no value except that they trigger long forgotten memories. How could I possibly object to him keeping such things. So this morning finds me in the lounge looking a a collection of cardboard boxes and wondering where on earth I am going to find space to store the contents. I think I will have to do some serious spring cleaning.

A New House Rule.

Robbie never learns! After a less than perfect Friday evening we had a lovely start to Saturday morning. It is so nice not to get up in a hurry, to have time to relax and listen to the radio or just talk. That's the bit that Robbie has problems with - the just talking bit. He can talk faster and for longer than anyone else I know. If talking was an Olympic sport he would be a gold medalist. His problem is what he talks about and when he talks about it! We were cuddled up, just enjoying the moment, one of those times when words are not really necessary - and then he spoiled it. He looked into my eyes and told me that he'd had an email the evening before. I thought it must be something serious, but I was wrong. He went on to tell me that the email contained details of the next three rail tours. He embarked on a detailed account of the proposed route of one of the trips. He was very excited about it because he had not traveled that route before. I was far from excited! I made a mental note negotiate a new house rule - no trains in the bedroom!!

Shirt Wars

How can the laundry cause such disruption in the household. Yesterday I spotted that Sam and Robbie would both need a clean shirt for the morning, Robbie has loads of clean shirts, but being a creature of habit he finds every excuse under the sun to restrict himself to about four shirts. Sam has plenty of shirts too, but several have been ruined by paint, ink and other assorted nasties that were beyond the help of a stain remover. One recent red stain leaves him looking as if he has a gun shot wound to the chest, so we are down to about 5 presentable shirts. I asked Sam to bring his washing down on Thursday morning, he didn't do it so I decided to wait and make him bring it down when he got back from school. The whites load was ready to go on, Sam just needed to put his shirts in and press a button, but being a typical male he 'forgot' to do it. When I got back from work I was really cross that it hadn't been done and after assorted threats I finally got him to bring his laundry down and I put the whites on.

I was so tired that I was struggling to stay awake. I am always tired, it isn't easy coping with a 'toy boy' especially one like Robbie! Anyway Robbie was messing about with his iTunes account again, so he agreed to see to the shirts when they were ready and I went off to bed. It shouldn't have taken too long, but the next I knew Robbie woke me in the middle of the night to moan that I had washed to many shirts! As far as I am concerned a white load is exactly that - a load, but Robbie insisted that I should just have washed one shirt for him and one for Sam. I tried to go to sleep and ignore him, but he went on and on until it ended in a row. The stupid thing is that this morning he went to work in 'Friday clothes' he didn't wear a shirt so all that fuss was pointless!!!

Feed Me Now!

Sometimes I feel that life is just one long round of feeding people! Often we are not all at home to eat our evening meal at the same time, so there is the added difficulty of producing something that can be cooked or served in stages. Then I have to think of the vegetarian option and take account of assorted food fads. No wonder it takes up so much time! In comparison you would think that the animals would be easy to feed, but they are a demanding bunch too. Meg the dog likes food and she is not especially fussy, she will eat whatever she is offered as long as it does not contain peas! She hates peas, but she will make sure she licks any gravy off them before spitting them out. Dave the cat lacks teeth but he can eat almost anything and he seems to think that food stolen from the bin tastes even better(I guess that is because he was a stray). He can tell the time perfectly and he gets very annoyed if he is kept waiting for his meals. Oreo is the greediest cat imaginable he will eat absolutely anything and every time anyone goes into the kitchen he rushes to see if there is any food for him but Shadow the guinea pig is the loudest and most demanding of the pets. If she hears a plastic bag rustle or if she hears the fridge door open she shouts for food, curly kale is her favourite, but she makes sure that she gets her '5 a day'. People sometimes say that in the future we will just take a tablet rather than eating a meal, it doesn't sound very exciting but it certainly has it's attractions!

Breathing Fire

Robbie has been out to play tonight, I had to stay up and fetch him from the station at five past midnight. I miss him when he is out but I don't mind too much because I know that work weighs heavily on him just now, it does him good to relax a bit. He rang me at about 10pm to arrange his lift and he proudly announced that he had restricted himself to soft drinks all night. I will not let him get anywhere near me if he stinks of alcohol so he thought he had avoided a night on the sofa. Unfortunately he had eaten garlic bread and he stank, in fact I had to drive home with my head out of the window because his breath was making my eyes water. If he thinks he is going to breathe all over me tonight he can think again, and if the dog has any sense she will chuck him out too!!

Unbelieveable!

I am so cross! When Robbie rang me to ask how I was, he had to endure s tirade of fury about Network Rail or to be more precise about Iain Coucher CEO of Network Rail. I had just read an interview with him in Personnel Today and it made my blood boil, I'm sure my blood pressure must be sky high.

http://www.personneltoday.com/articles/2009/03/23/49963/view-from-the-top-network-rail-ceo-iain-coucher.html

The article started off by acknowledging that Iain Coucher is used to being on the receiving end of criticism but Coucher asserts that he can take it. Interestingly no observation was made on how justified the criticism is, but if it was a play for sympathy from the reader it failed miserably. I suspect his astronomical salary helps him to put up with his hurt feelings.

The article plodded on rather predictably; considering the interview was personnel focussed I didn't think he was very complementary towards his workforce. Clearly he saw this as an opportunity to tell the world how wonderful he is, unfortunately for him I don't think most of 'the world' reads Personnel Today! Then I came to a paragraph that left me speechless, I couldn't quite believe what I had read and I had to read it again, in fact I read it several times, how could anyone make such arrogant assumptions? The paragraph in question began with Iain Coucher being asked about his staff .....
he says there are three distinct cultural groups within Network Rail: "There are 17,000 or so maintenance staff in orange jackets who tend to read The Sun; 9,000 signal box and control room staff wearing Network Rail fleeces and jeans, who may be Telegraph readers; and the professional services people who wear business attire and may get their opinions from The Times."

How dare he make such assumptions about his staff! Even the interviewer used the term 'simplistic pigeon-holing', but Iain Coucher claimed it helped him to communicate with his staff. Unbelievably it gets worse, he went on.....
“I like to make sure we angle our recruitment campaigns for each of the three groups towards their interests, and I not only try and dress like them if we're going to meet up, but I read each of their newspapers, as well as the FT, every day."

I think that shows astounding arrogance, but I guess it explains a lot, if Network Rail target the majority of their recruitment at Sun readers!!

The article rumbled from one exaggeration to the next. When asked about his greatest achievement at Network Rail he cited bringing track maintenance in house. Surely that was forced upon him by the numerous episodes of engineering overruns and the ensuing travel chaos!! To put it kindly he was making a virtue out of necessity.

He danced around the issue of his very large and increasing salary with the skill of a politician and his ability to spin the facts made Tony Blair look like an amateur!
"In the five years since we took over from Railtrack, we have achieved the highest ever punctuality record.......”
Really? It certainly doesn't feel like that and I suspect it doesn't feel like that to the TOC's either!

"We have pushed passenger satisfaction to an all-time high.......”
I am certainly not convinced by this statement, maybe the TOC'c have improved passenger satisfaction, but that would be in spite of rather than because of Network Rail! What about Network Rail's customers, the TOC's, the freight companies etc - I seem to remember some eloquent expressions of dissatisfaction from Virgin and I think the freight operators were unhappy too.

Having stretched my credulity to the limit, he managed to save the best until last. Under the heading 'minorities' he said
"We try and recruit minorities at the same rate as they apply, so if 10% of applicants are women, we try and convert that same proportion into job offers.....”

Women are NOT a minority!! They may be under represented in the rail industry, but there are some very able women in the industry and with a little effort there could be more. Network Rail should be doing more to encourage women to apply for employment. Women have many strengths including built in 'lie detectors', maybe Network Rail should employ a lot more women – to help them think up more believable excuses!

An Odd Weekend

I had a really odd weekend, Robbie went off to his dad's on Saturday and the children were out and about doing their own thing, even the dog was out! I am not used to having time to myself, there were hundreds of jobs that I could have done, but I got side tracked and spent a relaxing couple of hours sorting out my jewellery and finding a better way to store my earrings. I like jewellery but I don't wear it very often so it was nice just to remind myself what was hidden away in my jewellery box. I enjoyed the luxury of time to myself, but I had to drag myself back to reality to get on with my writing work, prepare a meal and as always 'mum's taxi' was much in demand.

Sunday morning was quiet, Laura went off to work, Emily was out and Sam didn't emerge from his room until much later. There was nobody to wish me a happy Mother's Day until Emily got home later on, Sam eventually managed to wish me a 'happy female care givers day' (I wonder about that boy sometimes!). I had a number of phone calls from Robbie, but it was a luxury to listen to the omnibus episode of the Archers in peace.

Later in the day I went off to see my mum and then to collect a very talkative Robbie from the Station. He'd had a lovely time at his dad's, he'd seen many family members and he had 'topped up' his accent and was talking even faster than usual. It was now clear why he didn't want me to go with him, I would have cramped his style, he admitted to drinking far more than was wise and knowing Robbie what he admitted to was probably an under estimate! Anyway when he got home he smelled of stale alcohol and smoke (other people's smoke) and he was pointed in the direction of the shower as soon as he got home! Even so it was nice to have him back.

Memories

Apparently we have several new blog readers, I always find it amazing that anyone should want to read the blog, but apparently they do. Anyway I decided to go back and choose a few of my favourite blog posts so to amuse the new readers.

Car Wash
Human Rights
Naked Truth
Family Ties -and Shirts!
The Wellington Boot Phase
Essentials
Feeling Blue

A Scary Thought!

Sam and Robbie get on very well really but they are a bit competitive and they never miss a chance to get the other in trouble with me. Then to leave me completely confused, when I am really cross with one of them they back each other up. When I got home last night it seemed a fairly relaxed atmosphere Robbie was sitting in the corner working in his laptop, I had expected him to be ready to go with me to fill the car up, but he was in his PJ's so I decided to leave the car until the morning. As I took Sam to school this morning he told me about Robbie having a little tantrum the when he got home yesterday. Apparently Robbie had been looking for a particular T shirt and he came down stairs to check the folded laundry in what Sam described as leggings. This had me laughing out loud, the thought of Robbie in leggings is so disturbing that it is funny. Sam kept a straight face and assured me that it would take years of therapy to deal with a sight like that. I protested that Robbie did not possess any leggings and suggested that he must have been wearing trunks. Sam shrugged and said settled on a new description - 'unmentionables'. Robbie insisted that he was wearing PJ's and he came up with a variety of complaints about the way Sam dresses. They are like two little boys, but I wouldn't want to change either of them (well not much anyway!).

Avoidance Tactics

When it comes to getting one of the cats to the vet I have to be very cunning they know exactly what the word 'vet' means, they can even spell because they understand even if I spell out the word 'V E T'. Meg the dog just turns into a nervous wreck but the cats are more cunning Oreo tries to sneak outside and then heads up the highest tree he can find, while Dave simply makes himself invisible,he is an expert on hiding and nothing will entice him out. These challenges are nothing compared to the difficulty of getting Robbie to go to the doctors. He doesn't rush out of the back door and head up the tallest tree he can find, but his avoidance tactics are just as effective. Last week he promised me faithfully that he would go to the doctors but he didn't make it, this week he has been ducking and diving and insisting that he is far too busy at work to go to the doctors. He has been having acute pain running down one arm and it is becoming more frequent, so I am not going to let him mess around for long. If he doesn't see sense I will have to send someone out with a tranquilliser dart like the ones they use on chimps! One way or another he is going to the doctors.

Questions, Questions.

We went to Sam's parent's evening yesterday but Robbie seemed unable to ignore his phone for more than a minute or two. On the way into the school he was having a text conversation about what train he caught to get home and how long it took him to walk to the station. He put the phone away, but as we were sitting in the classroom listening to a rather pleasing report of Sam's performance in science another text arrived almost silently, if the teacher noticed his suit pocket vibrating he didn't comment on it. As soon as we were back in the corridor he checked his text to find that was yet another colleague asking about the exact make up of a certain train! Robbie had to reply (in detail) before we could go and talk to Sam's English teacher – and they say that men can't multi task!

Not Wanted

Robbie's dad is moving house in a few weeks time. Robbie feels a bit sad about it as it will break the link with the village that he grew up in. When he was talking to his dad at the weekend Robbie arranged to go over and visit his dad next Saturday. His dad said that there was a lot of 'stuff' for Robbie to take home, so we would have to bring the car. I am suspicious of that word 'stuff' Robbie already has far too much clutter and I really don't know where to put any more! We need to be fairly ruthless in sorting out the junk that we already have. I agreed to drive to his Dad's house to pick up the stuff. I am not keen on driving that far north, it is such a boring journey and it seems to take forever to get there. I especially hate driving in Walsall because they don't seem to understand the difference between roads and pavements, it is like lemming year, people just dash out into the road! Anyway I was willing to drive to his dad's next Saturday, but to my surprise Robbie doesn't want me to go! His dad is having a bit of a get together for a few friends on Saturday evening, and Robbie wants to stay for that, he seems happy to take Sam with him, but he is worried that I will cramp his style! Never mind, I will have a nice day on my own instead.

Birthday Boy

Robbie was up bright an early to open his birthday cards and presents, he is still a kid at heart. He had money to buy a new pair of Dr Marten's, an emergency phone charger, a DVD box set of Spooks, a pen set in a leather case, more money and more pens. He had a lovely day and in the evening we went over to my mum's for a cup of tea and a birthday cake. Mum and David bought him a very posh suit wallet to replace the one he had stolen, he was almost speechless (a very rare event for Robbie!)

Time to Ourselves

Saturday was a rather special day. Robbie had to be up early to go to an appointment, so I had to be up early to take him, but he took me out to breakfast afterwards to make up for it. We had the rest of the morning to ourselves, it is really special to just be able to chill for a while because we spend most of our time rushing from one thing to the next. In the afternoon we went to my mum's house for an early birthday celebration. It was a day early but my aunt and uncle had their diamond wedding party on Sunday so Robbie had his birthday tea early. It was a really nice gentle sort of day

Red Nose Day

On Friday Sam sent me on an errand that sounded deceptively simple, but it look up a large chunk of my day. He wanted me to get him some green spray on hair colour, red, black and white face paint and some fake scars. I went to a number of different places looking for the items without success, in the end I had to go to a specialist costume shop and it cost a fortune. He wanted the items for Red Nose Day, apparently they were going to dress up at youth club. I wasn't quite prepared for the vision that emerged from his bedroom and we got some very odd looks as I drove him to youth club!

Sleep Talking

Robbie can go from being wide awake to fast asleep within seconds. It is rather disconcerting because he can fall asleep in mid conversation or even in the middle of doing something. Last night we were in bed talking and mid way through a sentence he started to talk about 'the Doncaster stop' I had no idea what it meant and he was not making sense so I couldn't ask him. A little later he was wide awake again, he seemed to be listening to what I was saying, but soddenly he shouted out '1955' then dozed off. I woke him and repeatedly asked what was special about 1955, he looked at me as if I was mad and in a very sleepy voice he said 'BR modernisation plan published, the dawn of the Deltics' - then he began to snore! If he is going to talk in his sleep I wish he could come up with next week's lottery numbers or at least something useful.

Old Age?

I am so tired this morning I just feel like curling up and going back to sleep, but there is no chance of that because I have too much to do. As well as my work I have to pop into town because it is Robbie's birthday at the weekend and I have one or two little purchases to make. His main present has already been sorted out, but I want to spoil him a bit. He thinks he is old, but he is only going to be 37, so he must think I am absolutely ancient!

On Saturday we are going to my mum's for a special birthday tea, but he has to wait until Sunday (his birthday) for his birthday cake. Mum has made him his favourite chocolate cake. Mum and Robbie get on very well because they have a common interest – food! My mum makes it her mission in life to feed people until they beg for mercy and if eating was an Olympic sport Robbie would be a gold medallist! I'm not going to write any more about his birthday now because I don't want to spoil the day and anyway I am heading off to town.

Changes

Sam has to select his GCSE options and he has very clear ideas about what he wants to do. He is not a great one for taking advice (its a man thing) and his form was completed before I even got to see it. At first I was anxious, but he is taking a broad range of subjects and it is better that he take subjects that motivate him to work hard. It is a difficult adjustment for me to find my youngest child suddenly very grown up and sensible, but I expect I will get used to it. Anyway the sensible bit doesn't last long, we just get fleeting glimpses of the sensible side and then we are back to the old familiar totally unique Sam.

On the subject of not taking advice, Laura is getting ready to take her driving test and is determined to get a car as soon as she can drive. I must admit that it will be a relief to have a second driver in the family, but I worry about the expense of Laura running and insuring a car, and of course I worry about her staying safe. I think this is just another case of mum needing to adjust!

Lost For Words

My nephew Oliver came out of hospital on Monday evening, I hope he is going to be OK now, he is such a lovely little chap.

Robbie was a little more forthcoming about his delayed return on Sunday, apparently he took himself off on a train ride. Words fail me – but he'd better watch out because I don't think they will fail me for very long!

Living Dangerously

Robbie has really overstepped the mark this time. He went off on his rail tour on Friday and was due home at tea time on Sunday, I took that to mean 5pm – 6pm. While he was playing trains I was running around doing all those mundane things that you only notice if they don't happen, washing, cleaning, putting away, pet care, food shopping, cooking, filling the car up and picking people up or dropping them off. I know he thinks we have a succession of 'good fairies' to do all that while I sit around watching Judge Judy, but I have news for him, they didn't turn up!!

I had a couple of brief phone calls from him on Saturday, but I was busy and all he could talk about was the rail tour. On Saturday evening I took my mobile and the house phone up to bed thinking that he may ring me to say goodnight – he didn't. He didn't ring in the morning either, I was a bit hurt, but I got on with my work and I was rather distracted because my little nephew had been admitted to hospital with breathing problems. 5pm came and went and there was no word from Robbie, so I began calling and texting with no response. He has two phones so I found it hard to believe that they both had no battery or no signal, but I continued to call al evening with no response. He was coming from Preston, I know it is in the north, but surely it shouldn't take an entire day to get home!

At 10.05pm I got a text asking for a lift, so his phone was working fine when he wanted something!I picked him up at about 10.30pm, he didn't manage more than a couple of words and there was no explanation or apology for not answering my calls. When he got home he went prowling around the house looking for things that hadn't been done, he didn't find any – or at least if he did he had the sense not to mention it! For reasons best known to him he decided to potter around in the kitchen tidying things that were already the way I wanted them. I had moved the furniture in the lounge and everyone agreed that the room worked better that way, Robbie didn't comment on it, but after I had gone to bed he moved it back. Clearly he has a death wish! This morning I put it back to the way I wanted it – two can play at that game!

Men!

I have been abandoned for the weekend again because Robbie is off on another rail tour, he is going from somewhere in the north to somewhere else in the extreme north and back again. He left early this morning and he will be gone until Sunday evening. By that time 'as if by magic' the food shopping will have been done, the washing will be done and all the boring weekend tasks will have been delt with – and Robbie will get home and tell me how tired he feels! Men!!

Alarmed

As usual the alarm clock went off far too early, it still felt like the middle of the night and I didn't want to get up, but when Robbie informed me that it was an hour later than our usual time to get up, I was suddenly wide awake. I have to take my mum to an appointment today so I had a very tight schedule and I was annoyed about getting up late. I was just sitting on the bed when Robbie burst in again to inform me that he was wrong and that it was an hour earlier than he thought! I was annoyed with him because that is a horrible way to wake up, but at least I was on schedule after all.

In a Minute!

I hope our neighbours go to bed early because if they had glanced out of the window at close to midnight they would have seen a very odd sight. The wind and rain had caused the fence at the end of our garden to lean perilously and Robbie had been promising all evening that he would go and investigate 'in a minute'. For someone who deals with train times accurate to the minute, he is far less respectful of time in his personal life! He managed to put off inspecting the fence until bedtime when it could not be ignored any longer because Meg needed to go out in the garden. Robbie ventured out wearing in a jacket, PJ trousers and Dr Marten boots and armed with a torch! I can't imagine what the neighbours would have thought, but at least the fence is secure (for now at least).

Zombie!

Yesterday was a day of constant rushing around. I had to take my mum to Wood Green Animal centre at Godmanchester because she is adopting a little dog and we had to take her dog to meet the new dog. They got on well and I am sure the new dog will have a lovely home with mum, but these things take up so much time – and we have to go back again on Thursday to collect the dog!

I spent the rest of the day rushing around just to get my normal jobs done before I went to work., then after work I had Robbie wanting me to pick him up from the station while Sam needed picking up at exactly the same time at the other end of town! Robbie had been out for a meal (and a drink or two). He was normal but talkative when we got home, but at about 11pm he decided to rearrange the furniture in the lounge! It almost caused an argument, but eventually I gave up and went to bed leaving Robbie sotting at the newly positioned table tapping away on his laptop. He didn't come to bed and I couldn't be bothered to go and look for him. Apparently he fell asleep sitting in front of his laptop, he claims the wall stopped him falling off his chair and when he eventually woke up he had slumped forward and was using the keyboard as a pillow! He was in such an akward position that he could hardly move, but he eventually stumbled up to bed!

The Sights You See ...................

Now I know why they say that you should be careful what you wish for. I am fairly used to sharing the house with assorted teenagers (and a 36 year old who closely identifies with his inner child!) so I am used to challenging behaviour of one kind or another. I have been wishing that a certain 14 year old would grow out of his aversion water, and that our daily battles about having a shower would be a thing of the past. My wish came true! He has discovered the joys of soap in a big way. Every time I go into the bathroom it looks as if there has just been a tidal wave, there are so many lotions and potions around the bath that it it takes me ages to move everything before I clean the bath. He uses so much shampoo, shower gel, deodorant, aftershave and assorted smelly stuff that breathing apparatus is required before entering the bathroom, but there is something even worse than all that. He balances a great big mirror behind the taps at the edge of the bath! The last thing I want is to sit and look at myself when I am in the bath, and when Robbie is in the shower - no I will not go on, some images are just shouldn't be imagined. I keep removing the mirror and it keeps mysteriously reappearing. I almost find myself longing for the old days!