Take Time To Enjoy The Simple Things In Life

A few weeks ago I went to Coombe Abbey with my friend, it was a very special treat because we had afternoon tea there and it was lovely to get a glimpse of the inside of the building. It was a very cold and blustery day and my asthma was playing up so we only went for a short walk before having tea, but we came across some beautiful clumps of snowdrops hidden away at the side of the building. They are so small and fragile but so beautiful, to me seeing them push through the ground when the weather is still so cold and miserable is a sign of hope that spring is not too far away.

Until this year I hadn't visited Coombe Abbey since 1986. Eric (my first husband) and I used to go there sometimes just after we were married; we lived in Rugby at that time. It has changed so much since then, but my life has changed beyond recognition too. Back then we had everything to look forward to, so much has happened since then, some of it good especially the children, and sadly some of it such as Eric's illness and death not good at all. My life is so different now, I have learnt to take pleasure in the simple things in life and to take time to enjoy what I have now rather than always looking for something better in the future

Road Rage

I think of myself as a fairly placid even tempered person generally, but I have to admit that there are a certain things that make my blood boil. The mere mention of milk floats has me gnashing my teeth and thinking evil thoughts. I could almost cope with at horrible noise they make, like an overworked hair dryer, but I can't forgive them for getting in my way or for moving so slowly that you could be forgiven for thinking that they were not moving at all. I encounter three milk floats every morning as I take various family members to school and work. They have a number of things in common, they are all driven by dubious looking men of a certain age who make up for their own inadequacies by disregarding the rules of the road and creating total chaos. All of them think it is OK to double park while they wander off to deliver the milk in their own sweet time. The one that I encounter in the ring road even weaves between lanes to cause maximum disruption and he doesn't exactly double park, it would be more accurate to say that he recklessly abandons his milk float skewed across two lanes of traffic! If only I had a hand grenade!!

Robbie thinks it is really funny that I get so wound up about milk floats and whenever he gets the chance he mentions them just to get a reaction - and it always works! The other day he tried to tell me that milk floats were perfectly designed for a quieter time on urban roads, he then asked me to think back to my childhood and remember how efficient milk delivery was. He is right it was certainly much faster and more efficient, because it took place long before rush hour. When I was very young our milkman had a horse, it didn't double park and it could easily outpace a milk float!

Every Picture Tells A Story

When Robbie goes on a rail tour I get sick of hearing about it. Before he goes he talks about the route, the engines, the arrangements and what he plans to wear. When he is there he rings me to tell me where he is, what he is doing and being Robbie he makes absolutely sure that I have all the details. When he gets home he shows me the photos and tells me about it all over again and just to be absolutely sure that he didn't miss anything! He is always tired when he gets home because according to him he works very hard during a rail tour, but thanks to a photo taken by one of his friends I know just how exhausting it is. As they say, the camera never lies!!

I am not usually overjoyed about Robbie going off on rail tours leaving me on my own for the weekend with all the routine chores to do. I would rather spend our weekends together because weekdays are very busy and we have very little 'us time'. I guess the moral is to be careful what you wish for because Robbie has arranged a 'special treat' for me - he is taking me on a rail tour. I told him that I wasn't keen on going but he said that he loves Deltics and he loves me so I should love Deltics too! When that didn't work he pointed out that we are a similar age so I should like Deltics - that certainly didn't work!! I do quite like travelling by train but I would rather travel on a proper train with an electrical socket to plug my laptop in. As it was my treat it should have been my choice, but there was no way that Robbie would miss the chance to see his beloved Royal Scots Grey.

I Should Have Stayed in Bed

Robbie went off on a rail tour in the early hours of this morning, so I had the day to myself. I decided that I would get up bright and early and head into town for one or two important purchases that can not be put off any longer. My bed was very comfortable and it was hard to force myself to get up when another half hour in bed listening to Radio 4 seemed so tempting, but I overcame temptation and plodded off to the bathroom. Oreo was sitting at the top of the stairs begging to be fed, I ignored his pleas and sent him back downstairs. Oreo brings out Robbie creative side, I was very impressed by his use of alliteration the other day when he chased the cat out of the kitchen calling him a "Furry Fat F..............". Ever the opportunist Oreo noticed that I had not closed the bedroom door properly and when I came back from the bathroom he was curled up on the end of the bed next to my mobile phone listening to Traffic Line! He must have stepped on the phone and hit the speed dial and found the only number there that will be charged on top of my call plan - typical!

When I came downstairs I found that a scale version of the Alps had been created on our kitchen floor. This was further evidence of Robbie's unique approach to life. He had to stay awake until the early of the morning and he said he would make a start on the weekend laundry. The 'mountains' were Robbie's version of sorting the washing into various loads according to colour - all I can say is that he can identify trains by colour and livery far more accurately than he can sort laundry! I re-sorted the loads and restored some sort of order to the kitchen, then I went to town - not my favourite Saturday morning activity but I couldn't put it off any longer.

I accomplished quite a lot in an hour and by then I'd had more than enough of town it was far too crowded for my liking. The next job on my list was a brief trip to the supermarket, Well, it should have been a brief trip but it seemed as if the whole world had chosen that moment to go to Morrisons, so even parking the car was a challenge. Then when I got inside it looked as if I would never get out again because they had no basket only checkouts working and I refuse to use those dreadful self serve things that shout at you as if you are simple and then announce to the whole store that you have 'a problem in the bagging area'! Finally I got served by a real human being and I was free to enjoy a nice afternoon visiting my friend..

On my way home I had three missed calls from my daughter and two more from my son, so I pulled over and phoned them to see what was wrong. I was relieved to find that there was nothing wrong, my daughter just wanted to make absolutely sure that I would be home in time to give her a lift because she was going out with a couple of friends - nice to know I have my uses!

What Planet is He On?

I know Robbie can be a bit random at times but on Friday evening he looked up from his laptop and started talking about the Clangers and why they didn't fall off their planet. I have considered many questions about the clangers over the years but I have never given the atmospheric conditions of their (imaginary) planet. I have wondered how Major Clanger acquired a military rank when the clangers do not have an army and I gave more than a passing thought to the soup dragon's reproductive habits, apparently there was only one soup dragon so where did the baby soup dragon come from? I was very tempted to tell him that being knitted allowed them to cope with the sparse atmosphere of their planet, but I know Robbie too well and such a comment would have led to him talking about Clangers all weekend. So I just asked him what made the Clangers pop into his head, he explained that one of his friends had commented about it on facebook, apparently her son had asked why Clangers don't fall off their planet. Obviously kids go for the easy questions these days. When Sam was little he liked to watch Coronation Street with his Grandma and one day he asked "How did the doctors make Hayley into a girl?" I would have preferred a nice safe question about the Clangers!!

A Question of Gender

Robbie phoned me from work today, just to say hello and to tell me about his day. He has something of the Reginald Perrin about him and he always provides me with a detailed account of his journey to work, paying special attention to any delays and the exact time of arrival. Today he told me that he would be having coffee with a friend of his on 28th Feb. I think it was mentioning the date that set him off, he told me that there was a very important birthday on 28th. After a brief moment of panic, I informed him that no one in our family had a birthday on that day. He told me that the most important female in his life would be 50 on that day. I said that he must have a secret woman because none of the women I could think of would be 50 any time soon. I was only mildly surprised when he said that he was talking about his favourite Deltic, Royal Scots Grey! he told me that all engines are female. He may know a lot about trains but he is wrong about that. My favourite engine is male and he was 50 in 2009, his name is Ivor, whoever heard of a girl called Ivor!!

As I was Going Up the Stair

Every time I go up and down stairs a little rhyme comes into my head.

As I was going up the stair
I met a man who wasn't there,
He wasn't there again today
I wish that man would go away

The reason for that particular rhyme is because Robbie has managed to make his presence felt even if he is not physically present. As most of his friends know he has passion for Dr Marten boots and he has far too many pairs (in my opinion). For a while they took over the bedroom until I banished them to the hall, but even in the hall they seemed to have a secret life and they would creep out and trip whoever passed by. Robbie decided that the stairs would be the ideal display / storage space for his boots. Ever since Christmas we have had a pair of Dr Martens on left hand side of each step (next to the wall) with just two empty steps at the bottom. Every time he goes up and down stairs he admires his boots and thinks about the how he will fill the last two empty spaces. He has his eye on a grey pair with a different sort of surface, they are dimpled, he likes them but I think they look like DMs with acne. I guess they are a lot better than the tartan pair that he lusts after. When I go up and down stairs I don't admire the boots, I just think what a pain it is to move them every time the stairs are hoovered and I make a mental note to make sure that he doesn't try to display his New Rock boots on the stairs, if I fell over those I could end up in hospital!

There and Back Again

Robbie had promised me a nice relaxing trip to York on Saturday, but it almost didn’t happen because my asthma decided to play up on Friday afternoon. I was feeling much better by Saturday morning so I agreed to go out as long as Robbie didn’t rush me. Usually he has me trotting backwards and forwards along the platform like a demented hen as he tries to predict exactly where he needs to stand in order to get his favourite seat. I hate running up and down stairs between platforms at the best of times, but if he had tried that today I think I would have collapsed in a heap.

Baldric Burgess had a cunning plan to make up time, we travelled from Northampton to Tamworth, then we caught a Cross Country service to Derby and we were just in time to catch the 9.46 Southampton Central to Newcastle service which took us to York. We wouldn’t have made that train if we had gone via Birmingham. My new netbook is so small and portable that I was able to tuck it into my rucksack and I sat on the voyager catching up on my mail and editing photos, that really is my idea of heaven.

We waited for several minutes at Doncaster and as I glanced out of the window I had an uncomfortable feeling that we may have been invaded by a foreign power. There was no need to worry it was just a group of East Coast staff in their rather unfortunate uniform. I wonder if the company were striving for the Russian border guard look or if they just stumbled upon it by accident.

When we got to York Robbie was bouncing around like Tigger, he was really excited about going to the National Railway Museum again. He loves the shop at the NRM and he kept calling me over to look at all the interesting goodies he had spotted. We spent ages looking at everything, there were some lovely books and DVDs. Robbie bought himself a couple of mounted prints and I bought him a poster and a 1907 Bradshaws railway map (because I wanted it too) it’s amazing.

We had a nice journey back to Birmingham on a Voyager, but sadly there was no catering until Derby. I like travelling on Cross Country services, the staff are usually friendly and helpful, the biscuits are lovely, but the tea is absolutely dire. There is so much that they do right, so surely it shouldn’t be beyond them to produce something that bears a passing resemblance to a cup of tea!

Things That Go Chomp in the Night

Robbie came very close to being harmed a few nights ago. I should be used to him testing my tolerance to the limit, but when he wakes me up at night he really is asking for trouble. Last Friday I wet to bed at around midnight and Robbie promised that he would not be far behind. I listened to the radio for a little while, but when it became clear that Robbie was not going to turn up any time soon, I turned off the light, settled down and went to sleep.

Much later I was woken by the sound of the bedroom door bursting open and Robbie clomping in talking (to himself or to his imaginary friend) about pants. I reluctantly opened one eye to look at the alarm clock, it was past 2am and Robbie was deciding what pants he wanted to wear in the morning. I closed my eye again and decided to be asleep, it didn't seem to bother him because he was going to talk to me anyway. The subject changed from pants to delayed trains and I knew that 'staying asleep' was the right decision.

Suddenly there was a big thump as a heavy object landed on the bed next to me, it made me jump and I gave up on the idea of 'staying asleep'. I rolled over to find that the Argos catalogue was next to me on the bed. At about the same time Robbie launched himself onto the bed and then spent what felt like hours beating his pillows and flapping the duvet around. I was getting seriously irritated and I was already planning cruel and unusual punishments, but he was totally oblivious. He propped his pillows up against the headboard unwrapped a toffee picked up the Argos catalogue and turned on the light. That was the final straw, I found my voice and told him in no uncertain terms to turn off the light. He refused, so I turned it off myself. He put it back on saying that 20 minutes with the Argos catalogue wasn't much to ask. I sat up and informed him that aggressive toffee chewing and browsing catalogues was NOT a bedroom activity especially at past 2am! I gave him a choice, either read and chew in the bathroom or stop being an idiot and go to sleep. Reluctantly he chose the latter, with a look of defeat he turned off the light, snuggled down and was instantly asleep. I was too angry to sleep, the chomping had been replaced with strange snoring noises like the sound of a balloon deflating!

Where Did The Time Go?

It was Emily's 22nd birthday yesterday. Birthdays tend to make you notice the passing of time and I found myself wondering where all the years had gone. I can remember Emily as a little girl so clearly that in one way it seems like no time at all since she was a confident, articulate and inquisitive little girl, yet when I stop to think back it feels as if those those days are so remote that they are part of a different lifetime. I am so glad that we took time to enjoy life and have fun with our children when they were young, and also that we enjoyed each and every milestone of their childhood. Emily has grown into a lovely young woman, I am very proud of her and her brother and sister, and now that they are grown up they bring me every bit as much happiness as when they were little. If I had one piece of advice to pass on to my children it would be not to put off living because you are too busy or because you don't have enough money. Enjoy the time that you have now and the people in your life now because things change so quickly. You can't make time stand still, but you can take a wealth of happy memories with you into the future.