Regrets, I Have A Few ..........................

Today would have been my Silver Wedding Anniversary, but sadly Eric and I only clocked up 17 years before his life was cut short by cancer. My life is very different now Robbie and I are together and the children are grown up and busy with their own lives. How am I supposed to feel? I really don't know. I can't help feeling pangs of regret for the life that we might have had and the pain of watching my children grow up without their dad and knowing that he has missed out on so much is something that I can not begin to put into words. People often say that life goes on, that's true, life goes on like it or not and you have to make the best of it. More to the point that is exactly what Eric would have wanted us to do. When I look at the children I see him in so many different ways, a smile, an expression, a mannerism and even in a particular way of walking. He would be so proud of of all their achievements and the confident and independent young people they have become. I often wonder what he would think about me and Robbie, I know that he would want me to be happy and to get on with the rest of my life, I think he would find it amusing that I had chosen someone so very different, but he would have been pleased that the children had the love and support of a caring step father. So perhaps more than anything today has reminded me not to dwell for too long on the what if's. Instead I will treasure the memories the life we had, and I will live my life to the full and value all the people who mean so much to me.